Date thread

[Jairzinho]

Can you elaborate?

 

You living in Spain now mate?

 

They more interesting over there?

 

Living in Sevilla.

 

More attractive, intelligent, interesting, forthright, etc. Obviously this doesn't apply to them all, or all British women. Just generally. I often have/had no idea what to say to British women.  

 

Had one yesterday, and another on Tuesday. Yesterday's was a second date, and it already feels so relaxed. Already taking the piss out of each other, pulling each other up on stuff, etc. I like that.

 

I think the slight language barrier makes for a really good ice breaker as well. You're basically forced to be slightly self-deprecating which removes any of the forced/formal bullshit. 

 

But yeah, mainly because Andalucian women are mesmerically beautiful.

 

This weekend's is a Betis season ticket holder. Been whatsapping each other about their Champions league campaign in 2005/06. 

[Hooch]

Denilson and Joaquim on the wings, remember wishing we'd sign one of them.

 

Sounds great that mate. 

[Jairzinho]

Even when they are dawdling in front of you on the pavement ?

 

They get swerved. In every sense of the word.

[General Dryness]

They are extremely fit. Really fit. There's one one i work with slightly hairy arms. I still want to loaf one up her dung hoop

 

Keep your machete handy.

 

And no, thats not a euphemism for penis.

[Alan Sex]

Keep your machete handy.

 

And no, thats not a euphemism for penis.

Don't get the two confused. Bit difficult to explain why you are slapping a bird around the face with your cock while she is bleeding out from a machete up the vaginal passage.

 

Sorry officer, it's all just a funny mix up!

[TheBitch]

What did you do, Bitch?

 

 

Got old

 

Say it ain't so, Champ.

[General Dryness]

Don't get the two confused. Bit difficult to explain why you are slapping a bird around the face with your cock while she is bleeding out from a machete up the vaginal passage.

 

Sorry officer, it's all just a funny mix up!

 

I finally know where I went wrong after all these years. In jail.

[Alan Sex]

I finally know where I went wrong after all these years. In jail.

It seems that long nights with the other inmates helped you to open up.

[General Dryness]

It seems that long nights with the other inmates helped you to open up.

On the plus side, I can fart without the noise giving me away.

[Shitty Arse]

Genuine question. If you were a recovering addict/alcoholic and you were apprehensive about telling potential dates about it. What would you do?

[VladimirIlyich]

Genuine question. If you were a recovering addict/alcoholic and you were apprehensive about telling potential dates about it. What would you do?

Get pissed and show up late?

[lifetime fan]

Genuine question. If you were a recovering addict/alcoholic and you were apprehensive about telling potential dates about it. What would you do?

Just say you don't drink/use if it comes up in conversation.

[Fowlers God]

Do a line of her tit

[lifetime fan]

Do a line of her tit

Really?

 

 

[Paulie Dangerously]

Genuine question. If you were a recovering addict/alcoholic and you were apprehensive about telling potential dates about it. What would you do?

I'd just do dates in coffee shops, cinemas etc and when drinks come up just say you don't.

[RJ Fan club]

Really?

 

 

She's got some seriously wonky boobage going on

[sir roger]

She's got some seriously wonky boobage going on

 

Mods, please take this to the Danielle Lloyd thread

[Tony Moanero]

Genuine question. If you were a recovering addict/alcoholic and you were apprehensive about telling potential dates about it. What would you do?

I'd say I didn't drink alcohol. If she asked why, I'd say I was a recovering alcoholic who was x amount of months/years sober. Lying about these things tends to come back and bite you on the arse.

[Jairzinho]

I'd say I didn't drink alcohol. If she asked why, I'd say I was a recovering alcoholic who was x amount of months/years sober. Lying about these things tends to come back and bite you on the arse.

 

And if she has a problem with it, she's probably a cunt anyway.

[KMD7]

Been reading through this thread from the start again.  

 

bigbak, Leg

[Jairzinho]

Tonight was ace. She was nervous as fuck last week, mainly about her English (she had no need to be). This week she was really relaxed, and quite funny. Went fucking spastic at the waiter who completely forgot her order. Absolutely pissing myself. The fella looked like he was going to cry.

[Nunavut Patrick]

Tonight was ace. She was nervous as fuck last week, mainly about her English (she had no need to be). This week she was really relaxed, and quite funny. Went fucking spastic at the waiter who completely forgot her order. Absolutely pissing myself. The fella looked like he was going to cry.

Bad sign mate, you will end up being the waiter in six months.

 

Bum and bin....bum and bin...

[Nunavut Patrick]

I met a girl off pof, went for a drink at a lounge, then a second date which led to Spunkmouse levels of car snogging and some side boob feeling.

 

Then a week or so of phone calls, texting, failing to match work schedues and then she sent a text saying she didnt think it would work out...like I was getting binbagged but wasnt aware we were actually going out...

 

Reminded me of when Kramer was ' fired'...

 

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=O5XT9CifIlY

 

Have I just been binned again???

[Jairzinho]

Bad sign mate, you will end up being the waiter in six months.

 

Bum and bin....bum and bin...

 

Ha, good luck to her. She'd get a rather different response.

[Herp McDerp]

Ha, good luck to her. She'd get a rather different response.

 

He does have a point though, I've found that people that treat waiters/waitresses/people in the service industry like shit tend to be douchenozzles.