Fucking Chili in my eye.

[Nantwich girl]

What a fucking twat of a cunt this shit is. Cutting up some Jalapeno's and stupidly rubbed my eye and now I feel like ripping the fucker out the socket. Is it true that rinsing your eye with milk gets rid of the pain?

 

No it's a myth. You need to chop up more jalapeños then rub them between your palms. Once you have done that, you need to take your little chap out and rub it very fast between your palms. It won't cure your eye pain but it will take your mind off it for a while.

[RedinSweden]

You can consider yourself fortunate it wasn't one of these:

 

BBC News - 'Record-breaking' chilli is hot news

 

 

I have had the second one down on that list Bhut Jolokia, only in a sauce, but that stuff was fecking hot.

[Captain Turdseye]

No it's a myth. I always chop up more jalapeños then rub them between my palms. Once I have done that, I take my little chap out and rub it very fast between my palms. It doesn't cure my eye pain but it does make me feel better about pretending to be a woman.

 

You're a dirty fucker Nige.

[Redder Lurtz]

Snorting that Original Source mint shaving gel isn't too clever either. Had a shave with that stuff last night and thought I felt a snotty nose coming on so I sniffed up hard. Turns out it was the shaving gel. I thought I was going to die.

[Fugitive]

This is a bit Simonish but the worst thing I've ever stupidly done along these lines is snort salt. That was fucking awful and hurts everywhere above the chest area. Your nose burns like shit, your head wants to explode, you cant open your eyes, your throat dies and your chest tightens up.

 

All because of a drunken dare whilst drinking tequila.

[Captain Turdseye]

This is a bit Simonish but the worst thing I've ever stupidly done along these lines is snort salt. That was fucking awful and hurts everywhere above the chest area. Your nose burns like shit, your head wants to explode, you cant open your eyes, your throat dies and your chest tightens up.

 

All because of a drunken dare whilst drinking tequila.

 

I give one of my dads mates a line of salt once before a night out, told him it was coke. He spent the first hour in the pub rubbing his nose and saying "Good stuff that innit"

 

That must have been some weak salt.

[Guest simon]

You're a compulsive liar.

 

And your a compulsive knob head.

[Fugitive]

I give one of my dads mates a line of salt once before a night out, told him it was coke. He spent the first hour in the pub rubbing his nose and saying "Good stuff that innit"

 

That must have been some weak salt.

 

He must have a fucking granite nose. It was fucking horrible and I was in agony for about 20 minutes. The only thing it accomplished was sobering me up.

[Fugitive]

And your a compulsive knob head.

 

That should be You're.

[Reacher]

Snorting that Original Source mint shaving gel isn't too clever either. Had a shave with that stuff last night and thought I felt a snotty nose coming on so I sniffed up hard. Turns out it was the shaving gel. I thought I was going to die.

 

Fuckinh right mate, my ex brought me some of the shower gel stuff home years ago. Had a shower all was good, got out and dried myself of my scrot felt like it was on fire. Was in agony, binned it.

[Trumo]

Fuckinh right mate, my ex brought me some of the shower gel stuff home years ago. Had a shower all was good, got out and dried myself of my scrot felt like it was on fire. Was in agony, binned it.

 

Blimey, that's a bit drastic!

 

 

(Oh, you mean the shower gel.)

[Carvalho Diablo]

You can consider yourself fortunate it wasn't one of these:

 

BBC News - 'Record-breaking' chilli is hot news

 

 

There's a new sheriff in town...the Trinidad Moruga Scorpion.

 

Trinidad Moruga Scorpion - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

[YOUTUBE]a2CPqX9e7go[/YOUTUBE]

[Red Phoenix]

As a huge fan of chilli, I hope I never ever have to experience this, ouch!

 

As for milk though : I thought it would help seeing as it's supposed to be a type of alkaline? As a dairy product it's apparently digested and turned into acid, but it seems to work when first drank to neutralize heat from eating hot food, so should've worked the same if you'd tried it on your eye.

[Stouffer]

I love jalapeños; the firey little bastards. D' is doing a tortilla bake and I'll be distributing them liberally.

[RJ Fan club]

I love jalapeños; the firey little bastards. D' is doing a tortilla bake and I'll be distributing them liberally.

I've got the Boy to mind and the lads over on Saturday while the birds are on a hen do.

 

I'm using the time to make jalapeño and cheese stuffed burgers

 

http://www.foodrepublic.com/recipes/5-awesome-stuffed-burger-recipes/

[Tony Moanero]

I love jalapeños; the firey little bastards. D' is doing a tortilla bake and I'll be distributing them liberally.

Negged for the sake of it.

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

This is a bit Simonish but the worst thing I've ever stupidly done along these lines is snort salt. That was fucking awful and hurts everywhere above the chest area. Your nose burns like shit, your head wants to explode, you cant open your eyes, your throat dies and your chest tightens up.

 

All because of a drunken dare whilst drinking tequila.

 

Years ago a mate stumbled down the stairs in the early hours after a party at his house to find this powder on his kitchen table. Thinking it was coke, as it would normally be present at the party, he snorted it.

 

It was bleach from a pack of his girlfriends hair dye.

[Stouffer]

I've got the Boy to mind and the lads over on Saturday while the birds are on a hen do.

 

I'm using the time to make jalapeño and cheese stuffed burgers

 

http://www.foodrepublic.com/recipes/5-awesome-stuffed-burger-recipes/

That looks fricking awesome.

[RJ Fan club]

That looks fricking awesome.

They were good, I made half the batch with Gouda and BBQ sauce, the other with Gouda and jalapeño.

 

However I also made Armadillo Eggs

 

http://www.food.com/recipe/armadillo-eggs-stuffed-jalapenos-78708

 

What's not to love about jalapeño stuffed with cream cheese, more cheese (Gouda), surrounded by sausage meat then wrapped in bacon. Cooked in the oven, then finished on the barbie?

 

Sexual Chocolate

[Dr Nowt]

Dorset Chili festival yesterday. Found something called a 7 Pot Brain Strain chili; they're meant to be quite pokey at around 1.4 million on the scale.

 

Asked the lad manning the stall if he's eaten one and he said absolutely no chance, but pointed me to a tester jar of the extract they make from it and said "I eat that though."

 

Had a big bump of it, then he goes "But only a tiny drop in a large pot of something, it's dangerous to eat it like that."

 

Funny little bastard, was agony for a good ten minutes. One of the hottest things I've ever tried, up there with Satan's Shit, Ten Minute Burn etc, except I was primed for those.

 

For this one, I was expecting a punch in the stomach and got one in the cock. Nothing like strangers pointing and laughing at you.

[Trumo]

[Babb'sBurstNad]

Dorset Chili festival yesterday. Found something called a 7 Pot Brain Strain chili; they're meant to be quite pokey at around 1.4 million on the scale.

 

Asked the lad manning the stall if he's eaten one and he said absolutely no chance, but pointed me to a tester jar of the extract they make from it and said "I eat that though."

 

Had a big bump of it, then he goes "But only a tiny drop in a large pot of something, it's dangerous to eat it like that."

 

Funny little bastard, was agony for a good ten minutes. One of the hottest things I've ever tried, up there with Satan's Shit, Ten Minute Burn etc, except I was primed for those.

 

For this one, I was expecting a punch in the stomach and got one in the cock. Nothing like strangers pointing and laughing at you.

 

I went a couple of years back and quickly realised my love of chilis hadn't prepared me for some of their testers. It's really hard to pretend something isn't hot as you're crying, but I think I pulled it off.