Dr Nowt

Chelsea era, by the looks of it.

Speaking of Beckham. Did smile when I saw people saying he’d sold his soul last week. Like he’s had a single crumb of that left to flog at any point this millennium. Like saying Jordan’s become promiscuous lately because she’s been spotted holding hands with someone.

Just lacking a wee bit of keeping your focus bitterly on future times when he isn’t here.

Bollocks to that. I’ve staked an internet reputation I don’t have on Naby failing hard. The way I look at it, being proven correct here is my birthright and I’ll be damned if the realistic hopes of Liverpool winning silverware is going to put its filthy hands on my birthright.

Every second he’s their manager is a day spent in pure sunshine for Liverpool fans. This really is a golden period. Thanks, Glazers.

Really pleased I took out that subscription for MUTV. Worth its weight in gold.

Sky Sports Premier League Live mate. Fuck knows re the second bit. Apparently Carragher, Neville and Jermaine Defoe’s opinion on what is wrong with Manchester United is of greater importance than what Jurgen Klopp thought about Liverpool’s record ever win over them. Priorities.

They’ve switched channels and Klopp is allegedly about to come on, for anyone as slow on the uptake as me.

According to BBC live text Klopp is already in his press conference. They’ve made a right fucking arse of this.

And that was merely an hors d'oeuvre compared to getting Rafa sacked for cheering him relentlessly while doing this to them at The Pit in a few weeks.

Fitting that the last touch of that game was from Peter Kay.

‘And we mustn’t forget how well that fella she met on Bumble has been pummelling my wife at ours every Tuesday while I’m at the office. He really has been performing wonderfully and I’m genuinely happy for him.’

My Mum’s round and has been listening to me cheering, laughing etc all game so is fully aware we’re 5-0 up. Just asked me which side’s fans it was when we were giving it the oles in possession 5 minutes or so ago.

Really should have rolled that to Curtis.

Naby Leita.