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Captain Turdseye

Season Ticket Holder
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Everything posted by Captain Turdseye

  1. Captain Turdseye

    Other Football 2021/22

    The 2021 season is firmly in the rear view mirror now. Champions League qualification starts tonight with Celtic up against Midgetland, who you’d imagine are a much better team than them, based on the last few European campaigns. The number of Everton players under investigation for noncing currently stands at one but there is of course plenty of time for that to change. Other interesting things to look out for in ‘other football’ this season are the removal of the away goals rule, Spurs failing miserably in the most uninspiring competition since the SportPesa Cup and FIFA attempting to fundamentally change the rules of the game forever, switching everyone off for good and allowing Dave U to close us down and focus on his golf website. https://hypebeast.com/2021/7/fifa-new-football-rules-trials-30-minute-halves-sin-bin-throw-ins
  2. Captain Turdseye

    Happy Birthday Champ

    The nicest, kindest, most considerate and best looking poster on this forum is celebrating her 40th birthday today. Happy Birthday, Cath x
  3. Ha. Coincidentally I did a five-fold on Victor last week or the week before. Four teams won and I was expecting the free bet. Didn’t realise they’d stopped doing it, which was a bit of a pisser.
  4. Always do four if I’m on Paddy Power. Money back as a free bet if one lets you down. Inevitably my Tuesday one usually pays for another losing bet on Wednesday in CL weeks.
  5. Maybe got away with one or two bits but we are a fucking fantastic football team. 21 games unbeaten.
  6. Aye. So much to say. Great game for the neutral. Get Fabinho on and it could still be a great game for us.
  7. Captain Turdseye

    Geordie Arabia

    My bird’s mum and dad are Geordies. Her dad doesn’t really talk much about footy because they’re shite. I’m interested to see if that changes now because he’s not an arsehole, he’s a good bloke. I know he streams games on his laptop if he’s in but he’s not one who watches games religiously. He came over to watch one Liverpool vs Newcastle game here but he drank a bottle and a half of red wine before half time and was nodding off for most of the second half. It was a shit game, to be fair. Her mum doesn’t watch footy but I can’t post about her dad without mentioning that her ma is a snide little goblin cunt.
  8. Captain Turdseye

    Geordie Arabia

    The House of Saud are buying Newcastle United according to the Wall Street Journal. What do you make of this?
  9. Captain Turdseye

    Saudi Arabia

    I started this thread and the Geordie Arabia one. I wonder if MBS will throw me a few quid.
  10. Captain Turdseye

    Saudi Arabia

    House of Saud: A Family at War - New documentary series started on the BBC the other night. http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b09m53d9 Did anyone watch it? Admittedly my knowledge of the situation in the Middle East isn’t the greatest so I found it very interesting. How do people see things going for this new Crown Prince?
  11. Captain Turdseye

    YouTube

    People of TLW. Please humour my eight year old daughter by liking this pathetic video… https://youtube.com/shorts/0E1QL-Q1wcY?feature=share … and if you’re feeling particularly generous, like the other five that I’ve uploaded too. I wouldn’t recommend watching them because they’re nonsense, but it will please her enormously and rep will follow.
  12. Captain Turdseye

    Coronavirus

    Red Phoenix has hacked Howie’s account!
  13. Captain Turdseye

    Coronavirus

    Negative for me and the girls. My missus’ result hasn’t come through yet but there’s surely not much chance of her having it, considering we share a bed.
  14. Captain Turdseye

    Coronavirus

    There’s fuck all wrong with him. It’s me who deserves the sympathy, running around the house catering to his every whim. Every time he hears the kettle he shouts “I’ll have one!”
  15. Captain Turdseye

    Coronavirus

    Positive for the boy. Still waiting for the rest of our test results. Home schooling for the youngest begins again tomorrow. *repeats to self* It’s only three days. It’s only three days. It’s only three days.
  16. Captain Turdseye

    Keir Starmer

    I’m another that knows nowt about economics and I’m not trying to catch you out here because I genuinely don’t know the answers and I can’t be arsed Googling. What were the deficits in previous years? Surely the financial year ending March 2021, for obvious reasons, must have had some big differences to the years prior, including the years in the run up to the last General Election?
  17. Captain Turdseye

    Other Football 2021/22

    Arsenal up to 12th. They’re still fighting for this title.
  18. Captain Turdseye

    Coronavirus

    One positive result out of the five tomorrow means I’m back to home schooling for the rest of the week. *sigh*
  19. Captain Turdseye

    Coronavirus

    He had a bit of a cold last week that came and went. There’s no way of knowing but maybe the LFT picked up on the last of that. He’s had the single vaccine dose that he was allowed. Me and her are double jabbed. I guess we could have had it without knowing. I don’t know. He’s fine. We’re all fine. That one positive LFT has just thrown up loads of questions.
  20. Captain Turdseye

    Coronavirus

    Positive LFT for my boy over the weekend. He had a total meltdown over the prospect of him missing school. Fucking nerd. He’s isolated in his room, testing negative now on the LFT’s and we’re all in limbo until tomorrow when the PCR tests come back, hopefully negative. Stressful as fuck.
  21. Captain Turdseye

    Golf thread / my new project

    Missed this. I’d probably have just took the punt on McNealy anyway. I can’t afford to bet on half the field like some people.
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