Instant cunt identifiers

[General Dryness]

On 16/10/2021 at 05:42, Dr Nowt said:

Do you shee the beasht?

[Section_31]

Anyone who uses the phrase 'mainstream media'.

[Harry Squatter]

17 hours ago, Section_31 said:

Anyone who wants a wacky funeral.

"Oooohhh, ooh I want everyone to wear pink or fancy dress and not cry, also want something hilarious as my funeral song"

[Tony Moanero]

1 hour ago, Section_31 said:

Anyone who uses the phrase 'mainstream media'.

It sounds cuntish, but I’ve never heard anyone use it. In what context is it used?

[Tony Moanero]

17 minutes ago, Harry Squatter said:

"Oooohhh, ooh I want everyone to wear pink or fancy dress and not cry, also want something hilarious as my funeral song"

Nah, people should have what they want.

[Harry Squatter]

3 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

It sounds cuntish, but I’ve never heard anyone use it. In what context is it used?

Covid deniers and anti vaxxers use it all the time. 

[AngryOfTuebrook]

2 hours ago, Section_31 said:

Anyone who uses the phrase 'mainstream media'.

Better if they abbreviate it to MSM.

[Tony Moanero]

Using the phrase “I have no words”. 

 

I’m sick of seeing this shit on telly and the internet.

 

[Captain Willard]

Anyone who puts their qualifications on their business card or in their e mail signature 

 

captain Willard 

 

(Bsc, MBA, etc etc) 

[General Dryness]

12 minutes ago, Captain Willard said:

Anyone who puts their qualifications on their business card or in their e mail signature 

 

captain Willard 

 

(Bsc, MBA, etc etc) 

You have every right to inform people that you have a bronze swimming certificate. 

[Trumo]

People who turn right to go into a car park they can see from the road is fucking jammed, thus blocking traffic going in the opposite direction.

[Remmie]

On 28/10/2021 at 20:41, Section_31 said:

Anyone who wants a wacky funeral.

What's a wacky funeral? 

[easytoslip]

6 minutes ago, Remmie said:

What's a wacky funeral? 

I should imagine it's one that's got quirky tunes and behaviour reflecting what a crazy character he or she was and how they would of approved. 

 

[YorkshireRed]

On 03/11/2021 at 17:12, Captain Willard said:

Anyone who puts their qualifications on their business card or in their e mail signature 

 

captain Willard 

 

(Bsc, MBA, etc etc) 

You’re right about this.

 

YorkshireRed

 

CSE Woodwork 

Cub Scout Home Economics Badge

Cycling Proficiency Test (Pass)

Community Service Completion Certification

[Chairman Meow]

On 06/09/2021 at 14:43, YorkshireRed said:

The better weather can also inspire us romantic poets:

 

The sunny weather,

reminds me of Heather,

we had sex by her bin,

cos her boyfriend was in.

 

I'm welling up here 

 

On 28/10/2021 at 20:39, Harry Squatter said:

People who can't interact or handle being sociable with anyone outside of their little clique of friends or family. 

 

I'm like that, except I can also barely handle being sociable with my friends and family as well and I'm not a, oh fair enough.

 

 

On 03/11/2021 at 17:12, Captain Willard said:

Anyone who puts their qualifications on their business card or in their e mail signature 

 

captain Willard 

 

(Bsc, MBA, etc etc) 

It's a plague amongst all the lecturers at uni, plus any associations they are members off etc.

 

Desperate attempt to make themselves seem clever, presumably because they actually know they are lecturing purely because they couldn't cut it in the real world.

 

The majority of them have more content in their signatures than they do in their lecture slides. 

[Mook]

Using the phrase 'Happy Friday'.

[Harry Squatter]

2 hours ago, Chairman Meow said:

 

I'm welling up here 

 

 

I'm like that, except I can also barely handle being sociable with my friends and family as well and I'm not a, oh fair enough.

 

 

It's a plague amongst all the lecturers at uni, plus any associations they are members off etc.

 

Desperate attempt to make themselves seem clever, presumably because they actually know they are lecturing purely because they couldn't cut it in the real world.

 

The majority of them have more content in their signatures than they do in their lecture slides. 

My comment meant more about banter merchants who have their own in jokes and phrases with their little social circle but can't really function outside that. 

 

I know one lad who does this with his mates and brother but he can't interact with anyone outside of his own little bubble because no one gets his shit jokes and bizarre sayings. 

 

I know there's loads of us who would quite happily not bother with a lot of people unless we had to but it's just funny to watch people who are king of their own little crew squirm and malfunction if you remove them from it.

[Curly]

1 hour ago, Mook said:

Using the phrase 'Happy Friday'.

Anything that nods to the upcoming weekend and a firm fuck off to the shite work week behind you, I’m all for. I’ll even enjoy a gif if sent to me. My favourite I’ve ever been sent is below:

[Harry Squatter]

My mates brother does day countdowns on Facebook because he's had the same shite job for years despite doing nothing to look for a new one or better himself.

 

You think he would have a massive blowout or do interesting things at the weekend but all he does is watch Saturday night telly with his Yoko Ono bird drinking Carling. Him and his bird literally do everything together. 

[redinblack]

17 minutes ago, Harry Squatter said:

My mates brother does day countdowns on Facebook because he's had the same shite job for years despite doing nothing to look for a new one or better himself.

 

You think he would have a massive blowout or do interesting things at the weekend but all he does is watch Saturday night telly with his Yoko Ono bird drinking Carling. Him and his bird literally do everything together. 

What sort of life is that?

 

Carling is shit.

[Tony Moanero]

1 hour ago, Harry Squatter said:

My mates brother does day countdowns on Facebook because he's had the same shite job for years despite doing nothing to look for a new one or better himself.

 

You think he would have a massive blowout or do interesting things at the weekend but all he does is watch Saturday night telly with his Yoko Ono bird drinking Carling. Him and his bird literally do everything together. 

Does he post on here? I just had a quick trawl through the Small pleasures thread but couldn’t find any mention of shit Saturday night telly and Carling.

[Harry Squatter]

1 minute ago, Tony Moanero said:

Does he post on here? I just had a quick trawl through the Small pleasures thread but couldn’t find any mention of shit Saturday night telly and Carling.

No, he's an Evertonian so that's even more misery for him.

[sir roger]

Sammy Wilson DUP , Cunt so he is.

 

Fancy being the only non-Tory mp to back the effort to get that corrupt weasel off during the week

[Captain Howdy]

People who say “come with”

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

On 05/11/2021 at 08:52, YorkshireRed said:

You’re right about this.

 

YorkshireRed

 

CSE Woodwork 

Cub Scout Home Economics Badge

Cycling Proficiency Test (Pass)

Community Service Completion Certification

VERBAL DIARRHEA. Buildings and Standards Trade Association Rules Diploma.