The world of a woman.

[lifetime fan]

Or...you know...just don't go out with utter cunts.

 

Blokes don't do it for me though.

[lifetime fan]

Don't you just love the way they think everything you say is a lie.

 

Now I dare say many blokes don't help with this but their clear failure to understand a man is embarrassing. 

 

Lots of sex, not too much nagging, lots of sucktreats and not too much mentalness and we're quite easily pleased.

 

But we have snapping points and when I tell you the dog comes first believe me you daft cunt.

[Ian Sea]

Don't you just love the way they think everything you say is a lie.

 

Now I dare say many blokes don't help with this but their clear failure to understand a man is embarrassing.

 

Lots of sex, not too much nagging, lots of sucktreats and not too much mentalness and we're quite easily pleased.

 

But we have snapping points and when I tell you the dog comes first believe me you daft cunt.

You're asking for trouble telling your bird that the dog comes first mate, even if it is true. That was never going to go down well!

[Mook]

He probably knows her well enough to know that a bottle of wine will shut her up. Bigger picture and all that.

A woman shutting up after a bottle of wine is a new one on me, they're usually ten times worse.

 

My motto is when they start nagging, it's time to fuck off to the pub. Or to bed.

[Paulie Dangerously]

 

But we have snapping points and when I tell you the dog comes first believe me you daft cunt.

Mine was moaning it's cold last night. She got told to put a jumper on. It's the warmest October in our living memory.

 

I went into the hall and the dog was in a curled up ball which we call 'the Stanisphere' (Stan is Sphere) which he does when he is cold. I ran up stairs and put the heating on.

 

When I came down... Christ if looks could kill

 

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

Mine was moaning it's cold last night. She got told to put a jumper on. It's the warmest October in our living memory. I went into the hall and the dog was in a curled up ball which we call 'the Stanisphere' (Stan is Sphere) which he does when he is cold. I ran up stairs and put the heating on. When I came down... Christ if looks could kill

 

I'd imagine thats because the dog can't put on a jumper. It makes perfect sense.

 

Also, dogs are loyal. Dese hoes ain't.

[Paulie Dangerously]

I'd imagine thats because the dog can't put on a jumper. It makes perfect sense.

 

Also, dogs are loyal. Dese hoes ain't.

To be fair he has got a fleece jacket but if he wore it in the house he wouldn't feel the benefit outside

[lifetime fan]

You're asking for trouble telling your bird that the dog comes first mate, even if it is true. That was never going to go down well!

 

Haha True.

 

He always will though and she knew from the very beginning the baggage I came with and 'could deal with it'. She was the one that wanted more than just fucking.

 

Well now I've fucked off.

[lifetime fan]

Mine was moaning it's cold last night. She got told to put a jumper on. It's the warmest October in our living memory. I went into the hall and the dog was in a curled up ball which we call 'the Stanisphere' (Stan is Sphere) which he does when he is cold. I ran up stairs and put the heating on. When I came down... Christ if looks could kill

 

Paulie, I owe you a pint. That is fucking brilliant.

[alles ist gut]

To be fair he has got a fleece jacket but if he wore it in the house he wouldn't feel the benefit outside

Sorry, negged by mistake, I'll rep some other stuff...

[lifetime fan]

Sorry, negged by mistake, I'll rep some other stuff...

 

I sorted it.

[Bjornebye]

Don't you just love the way they think everything you say is a lie.

 

Now I dare say many blokes don't help with this but their clear failure to understand a man is embarrassing.

 

Lots of sex, not too much nagging, lots of sucktreats and not too much mentalness and we're quite easily pleased.

 

But we have snapping points and when I tell you the dog comes first believe me you daft cunt.

You haven't told us what she did to the dog?!

[lifetime fan]

You haven't told us what she did to the dog?!

 

Was short with him a few times when she was ill, I pulled her on it, she said something I didn't like and the toys went out the pram.

[Major Tom]

Did you give her two for flinching?

[Total Longo]

I went into the hall and the dog was in a curled up ball which we call 'the Stanisphere' (Stan is Sphere)

 

Thanks for the explanation there, Paulie.

[Paulie Dangerously]

Thanks for the explanation there, Paulie.

Thought I'd clarify

[Bjornebye]

Did you give her two for flinching?

And you call me a thug..

[Major Tom]

And you call me a thug..

 

I call you a lout, not a thug.

[lifetime fan]

Did you give her two for flinching?

 

No. Tempted though.

[Bjornebye]

I call you a lout, not a thug.

Oh thats fine then.

 

Now go and smack a pregnant woman with ebola

[Major Tom]

Oh thats fine then.

 

Now go and smack a pregnant woman with ebola

 

What?

[Captain Turdseye]

She invited me to download some quiz game she was playing the other night, then spent 2 hours calling me a cunt for being better at quizzes than she is.

[setreal]

Who is your wife?

[Bjornebye]

Glad your out the doghouse Jon

[Captain Turdseye]

Glad your out the doghouse Jon

I got out after a couple of days and she got in mate. Great success.