Have a rant thread

[Liverpool lad]

Through work I have to deal with a bit of debt collection and it really gets on my fucking tits when they bullshit me about the money. I don't lose much sleep if somebody does the company for a few quid, but I fucking hate listening to them trying to blag me and thinking they are succeeding. As I work for the company I have to be nice to them when deep down you are thinking 'you lying bastard'.

 

I fucking hate post offices too, I pop in there now and again for stamps for the office and have to watch people withdraw all their money and pay every fucking bill on a multitude of cards, it takes fucking ages for them to do it. All the staff are slow as shit as well.

[Liverpool lad]

People who have been in the armed forces for about 3 months and start talking about squaddie life and how everyone in 'civvy street' is a bit soft.

[Captain Turdseye]

I call tarts "queen" all the time. Got a few strange looks when I was doing it in Vegas.

 

I was shagging some bird a couple of years ago and she used to call all women "Queen" and all men "Chicken" in a horribly over exaggerated Scouse accent. Got right on my nerves. Sneaked her out of my ma's house early in the morning a couple of times because it was that bad, had to fuck her off after about 3 weeks.

[Section_31]

Young lads in pubs, they all think they're 10 men these days. It's enough to make you grateful for a Tory Government knowing their dreams are being destroyed.

[Champ]

Sunburn? Sunburn? I am so fucking cold I'm thinking of putting the heating on

[Hooch]

Yep, winter is on it's way. Joy.

[lifetime fan]

Lashing down here but not cold.

 

Can't wait to finish work and get the dog out in the rain.

[melons]

Sunburn? Sunburn? I am so fucking cold I'm thinking of putting the heating on

 

Mine went on for a few hours last night, i figured being sat on the couch in all the layers i usually wear for camping i could justify it.

[Skidfingers McGonical]

Young lads in pubs, they all think they're 10 men these days. It's enough to make you grateful for a Tory Government knowing their dreams are being destroyed.

 

Easy Tiger.

[TheBitch]

Easy Tiger.

 

Hahaha, when I read Sec's post, I actually said out loud 'WHOA'.

[Bobby Hundreds]

Proffessor green makes me feel ashamed to be a human being. Though I suppose it's good to be alive during interesting times the fact I'm alive whilst this talentless prick exists is something I suppose or I'd never believe he was real and that people actually pay him. Shame on you. He's possibly my only doubt about evolution that a process of survival of the fittest spanning over billions of years could culminate in that twat being alive and actually successful.

[A_S]

When you are in a bar and get to the front and are waiting patiently, then some cunt slips in from behind you to a vacancy created by a just-served customer.

 

The busy bartender then looks up from closing the register and asks 'who's next?' and the jammy cunt who KNEW you were there before them just goes right on ordering without having the courtesy to ask you to go first.

 

Does my fucking head in.

[Chairman Meow]

The amount of warning messages that every piece of software has these days.

 

Trying to do a simple fucking task this morning and getting bombarded with pointless fucking messages rather than being able to just run a bit of browser based java and then print a label and mainfest out for the courier. Fuck off with telling me the software is out of date, the site I am visiting is secure and the that fucking Acrobat has been updated for about the 100th time this year. I know there are updates available, I just don't care or need them because the machine fucking worked and is more than capable of doing what I am trying to do just like it has every day for the past 3 years you fucking cunts.

[JagSquared]

Cunts on facebook who put "hilarious" middle names into their profiles in an effort to look unique and seem interesting. Well you don't all you are fucking doing is telling people how much of fucktard you are and your need to validate your personality through others. No one gives a fuck of you think you should be known as the "badman" your just a skinny sack of shit that wouldn't scare an ant.

 

The worst culprit of this is a friend and I use that term loosely as i met the fucker around twice who insists on using the middle name "happy" despite being a manic depressive fuck with a drinking problem. Now I could block him bit that would remove the ability to watch this persons descent to fuckwittery. The most annoying thing is seeing this twats face pop up everytime I try and say happy birthday to any real friends as Facebook insists on trying to tag them!

[VladimirIlyich]

Wigs.

 

Or more specifically American middle aged and old men who show up on shows about cold cases or murders in bumfuck,arizona from 20 years ago and because they speak on camera think they need to have hair.

 

You look fuckin' ridiculous,you are better off showing the natural course of events you idiots.

[Harry Squatter]

Cunts on facebook who put "hilarious" middle names into their profiles in an effort to look unique and seem interesting. Well you don't all you are fucking doing is telling people how much of fucktard you are and your need to validate your personality through others. No one gives a fuck of you think you should be known as the "badman" your just a skinny sack of shit that wouldn't scare an ant.

 

The worst culprit of this is a friend and I use that term loosely as i met the fucker around twice who insists on using the middle name "happy" despite being a manic depressive fuck with a drinking problem. Now I could block him bit that would remove the ability to watch this persons descent to fuckwittery. The most annoying thing is seeing this twats face pop up everytime I try and say happy birthday to any real friends as Facebook insists on trying to tag them!

 

 

I see lots of cunts pop up on my friends status with stupid middle names like 'the daddy' or 'madman' or 'sparkly' and others who change their names round every few months.

 

Some bird on mine knows some bad self important art student type who has a boring name but decides to call himself "dan itsreallyme" why the fuck anyone would do this is anyone's guess. He put on his profile "do not friend request me unless I ask you to" in block capitals. I got about 50 people to friend request him, he put another warning on stating no one should request him, now the stupid twathas disabled his account.

[Unrighteous]

I see lots of cunts pop up on my friends status with stupid middle names like 'the daddy' or 'madman' or 'sparkly' and others who change their names round every few months.

 

Some bird on mine knows some bad self important art student type who has a boring name but decides to call himself "dan itsreallyme" why the fuck anyone would do this is anyone's guess. He put on his profile "do not friend request me unless I ask you to" in block capitals. I got about 50 people to friend request him, he put another warning on stating no one should request him, now the stupid twathas disabled his account.

 

That's inspired, mate. Brilliant.

[Acid]

Cunts on facebook who put "hilarious" middle names into their profiles in an effort to look unique and seem interesting. Well you don't all you are fucking doing is telling people how much of fucktard you are and your need to validate your personality through others. No one gives a fuck of you think you should be known as the "badman" your just a skinny sack of shit that wouldn't scare an ant.

 

The worst culprit of this is a friend and I use that term loosely as i met the fucker around twice who insists on using the middle name "happy" despite being a manic depressive fuck with a drinking problem. Now I could block him bit that would remove the ability to watch this persons descent to fuckwittery. The most annoying thing is seeing this twats face pop up everytime I try and say happy birthday to any real friends as Facebook insists on trying to tag them!

 

Witnessed some of this myself recently. Im off to uni next month and I emailed the university to ask to be put with people my own age, not the young rowdy lot and I got an email back saying that they understand and they get a few of those requests each year. So I think oh thats good, someones got my back.

 

I got my room number yesterday and I had a look to see if anyone in the freshers group on facebook had anyone else in my flat.

 

Top result: (first name) Legen Dairy (last name)

 

Kill me now.

[Reacher]

Twats that buy Audi alloy wheels for their fifteen year old golf. What the fuck is that all about?

[ZonkoVille77]

Didn't read through the whole thread but here's my rant.

 

Cunts at ATM machines pressing buttons like its a fuckin playstation. I've honestly been stuck for up to 10 minutes sometimes with pricks fuckin around. Putting the card in and out like its going to miraculously increase their bank balance each time. Cunts.

 

ATMs are hardly new fuckin technology.

Its a fuckin cash dispenser! Put in your card, type your pin and select the amount. Finished. End of.

 

Shouldn't take more than 2 minutes the cunts.

[The Guest]

Fucking police cunts. Not all police just the cunts. Had me fucking livid on the weekend.

 

In town on friday on a night out. Walking down the road when this matrix van is rolling forward literally rolling into the main pathway. This is a good 20 metres in front of me and is rolling across my path. 3 or 4 of these cunt bizzys are on the near side of it. I look at the van and think well it's rolling forward I will just walk around the back of it.

 

At this point cunt number 1 decides to put his arm in front of me. The van is a good 10 metres away.

 

"Watch where you're going. Can you see that big yellow thing in front of you there?" I instantly thought what is this wanker after. I was polite and apologised, even though there was no fucking need as I was nowhere fucking near this van. Waited about 2 secs when he moved his arm and jogged round the back of the van to get out of the way of whatever the fuck they were doing. At no point did I get within 5 metres of this fucking thing.

 

I start to ring my mate as the whole reason I was heading back in this direction was to find him. I felt a hand grab my arm from behind. I turned round and he said "Put the phone down" and before he had basically even said that he was shouting "Put the fucking phone down!"

 

Still being polite "I'm sorry what's wrong?" "You know whats wrong, do you realise you could get sent down for 3 months for what you have just done"?

 

I actually thought the cunt was taking the piss. I was laughing as if to try and difuse the situation and said "I was just trying to find my mate, I have lost him and I wanted to just get out the way of the van." I could see him just waiting for any reason to throw me in the back of this van. He was absolutely seething. All the other cunts were pretending like this conversation wasn't going on.

 

"Stop fucking smiling lad!"

 

Sober as a fucking judge not slurring a word and speaking perfect english "Sorry mate I have had a few drinks and I just want to find my mate"

 

"If you can't handle your ale, I suggest you don't drink."

 

I was just looking at him puzzled with literally about 100 responses in my head ready to tear this cunt a new arsehole. It's probably a good job I was sober.

 

"Go on get lost" he said to me.

 

What the fucking hell gives these cunts a right to talk and act to people in this manner? It's a fucking disgrace and no wonder so many people hate the police when you have cunts acting like this and other bizzys just letting him get away with it.

[Special K]

Proffessor green makes me feel ashamed to be a human being. Though I suppose it's good to be alive during interesting times the fact I'm alive whilst this talentless prick exists is something I suppose or I'd never believe he was real and that people actually pay him. Shame on you. He's possibly my only doubt about evolution that a process of survival of the fittest spanning over billions of years could culminate in that twat being alive and actually successful.

 

Every time that advert he does for Relentless energy drink comes onto the telly I break every toe in my feet due to them curling so hard.

 

It's fucking embarrassing. Then i think about it and realise the younger generation laps that shit up. Sad times.

[Joe Le Taxi]

When you are in a bar and get to the front and are waiting patiently, then some cunt slips in from behind you to a vacancy created by a just-served customer.

 

The busy bartender then looks up from closing the register and asks 'who's next?' and the jammy cunt who KNEW you were there before them just goes right on ordering without having the courtesy to ask you to go first.

 

Does my fucking head in.

 

This. I was in Revs on Saturday and I let the guy who was queuing ahead of me go and he said he was surprised I did that and said thanks.

 

It's mainly down to shitty bar staff though. My cousin is assistant manager in a bar and he is constantly telling staff to number the customers at the front of the queue so you don't get people pushing in.

[JagSquared]

Bit of an irrational one and I may actually be just a bit mental here...

 

When your watching a TV show and they are making scrambled eggs, while they chat talking to their husband/ wife/ partner /child what ever the fuck. They then proceed to put a bit of eggs in their plate and then in some of their own and then put the pan back with some egg left in.... WHO THE FUCK DOES THAT? Just share the fucking eggs and be done with it, why leave some in the pan? It really does my head in when I see it, I have no idea why.

[Guest davelfc]

Bit of an irrational one and I may actually be just a bit mental here...

 

When your watching a TV show and they are making scrambled eggs, while they chat talking to their husband/ wife/ partner /child what ever the fuck. They then proceed to put a bit of eggs in their plate and then in some of their own and then put the pan back with some egg left in.... WHO THE FUCK DOES THAT? Just share the fucking eggs and be done with it, why leave some in the pan? It really does my head in when I see it, I have no idea why.

 

The sick bastards.