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About melons

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    TLW Season Ticket Holder
  • Birthday 19/12/1976

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    Women with pregnancy related psychological disorders.
  • Biography
    I am your worst nightmare, until you meet my mum or sister.

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  1. melons

    FAO stevebaby

    His feet, can you not see those shorts? I said if they were useless if he chose them to help us find him if he got lost, a bright top or hat maybe, not 1993 neon shorts. Great company, but questionable colour choices. I'm not sure his missus would have let him out the house had she known he had those packed, or thinking about it, she totally did and knew that any woman wouldn't give him a second look in them? Absolute honour putting Green Jesus up and yep, a fair bit emotional. Managed to ensure that everyone that sat near us (as I was thoroughly organised, picnic mat and camping chairs obviously) was fully aware of how he came to being, so play nice with any new forumites making enquiries. Also, don't take camping chairs with you as people really think you're organised and have your shit together thus and tend to gravitate towards you the more pissed they get. Do we have washing instructions for Green Jesus, please tell me i'm not doing it by hand? Also whose next for him, or is anyone heading over to North Wales? I've got some velcro rip ties/ribbon that can go in the bag it'll make easier for you to pop him up. Honest it really was lovely being able to do this.
  2. melons


    And its here....
  3. melons

    Mark Drakeford

    Yeah, i reckon that helps a lot. Plaid did really well too this time though, and with whats going on in NI, the calls for devolution will only grow unless central government is fully hauled over. Be interesting to see if both BJ and KS end up being charged, the impact of the next election could be quite something.
  4. melons

    The Monster Munch Showdown

    Pickled onion and a can of fizzy vimto, my mid morning work break sorted. The crisp shortage a few months ago had me panic buying if i saw them and rationing (hiding them from the rest of the house) them when i was able to buy them. There is currently a full six pack and a single left over from a multipack in the cupboard. All of the beef and flaming hot remain. Clearly pickled onion flavour wins.
  5. Still can't believe it never worked out. Still love you though. Also, those brilliant messages in the reps and negs boxes, ooo they used to fill my evenings with delight! Fuck off. 30? Can you speak clearly yet?
  6. melons

    Mark Drakeford

    Benefits aren't devolved like they are in Scotland. Yet whilst they're not able to offer benefits, they swerve around it with grants and extra subsidies. From September, every primary school age child will get free school meals, and then even in holidays they've ran SHEP for the last few years in many counties (it's under a new name now that i can't recall). Student finance for further education and student finance for higher education is much better, our nurses and NHS students still get bursaries. I love living in Wales, me. And yes, Drakeford speaks like your grandad reading you a bedtime story, but he's on par with Thornbury when the vicious quips come out. Also like how Welsh Labour and Plaid working together are moving to wanting a more independent Wales. Welsh Labour and Labour are very different.
  7. melons

    Family Strife

    My nan died in 2008, as some of you remember as i went on to deal with some fucking horrific family shite following. Recently (in June) came across some paperwork that was never followed up, turns out there was some money held in an annuity. in 2016 a relative claimed she had died with no will, provided a death certificate and a birth certificate proving to be her son and claimed 2/5ths of the money (he also blagged he was claiming my mothers). Annuity company didn't bother to check that there was a will and probate logged with .gov and paid out. Logged a complaint in September, detailed the 30+ hours of calls i've made, the 17 names of people i've dealt with and they responded last month - they're still refusing to pay out the full amount. To top it all, they've offered me a whole £200 compensation for the hassle they've caused. Yeah, with the ombudsman now, like. Families can be right cunts - my mother has also called me a money grabbing bitch and informed me she wants nothing to do with me as i'm willing to watch this cunt uncle have a heart attack and criminal charges against him... just as he was willing to put me through criminal charges when he claimed i'd flooded my nans house deliberately following her death to claim on the insurance. So, if anyone has a family member thats died and you're not sure of their pensions etc - all you need is a death certificate and evidence of your family connection (in this case birth certificate) and you've nailed it.
  8. melons

    Police are cunts

    The point remains. Its unacceptable to treat an animal like that, but you're ok treating humans that way. And would you look at that - a post further down you concede it's not a hammer. You'd have the poor bastard hung before you got the full facts in your face, and then you'd twist them to suit your agenda. I'd go with that.
  9. melons

    Police are cunts

    And at several points he raises his arms defensively, and clearly unsteady on his legs. 2 coppers initially, the rest followed after he'd been tasered and was clearly even more disorientated. totally had the ability to do a bit of DIY with his rucksack and 2 tesco bags. Stop and think before you type, eh? Totally. I also had him as the local gym knob staring at his body in the mirrors all day pretending that his gut is all strength and muscle...
  10. melons


    About right, but I could only dream of it being tarmac... 6 hours of digging when we're snowed in, and that was after 5 days of waiting for it to thaw.
  11. melons


    Yeah but the only time I walk up half of it is if I've got to go down the drive and get the post. We're about half way up a hill by comparison to some of these mountains pictured. It's the Berwyn Mountain range. Actually, Easter sunday is another day we are a sure thing to go up, clock up around 5 miles just hiding the kids Easter eggs all over the place before 7am. We then wake them up, get 2 camping chairs out to plonk in a field where we get an ace view of then walking past most of the eggs. The rule is what they don't find, we get to keep. First one is when we start with the eggs around 5.30 second image some time has passed and they're still hunting. You can just about make out the kids on that one.
  12. melons

    Police are cunts

    He didnt comply, lots of people don't comply, doesnt warrant the actions of the copper. My point of the dog was that the RSPCA would have somone strung up for that. You seem to be condoning the coppers actions. Hes clearly a knuckle dragging bully who needs to get back into some training. The fucking state of him there with the taser on a man who could barely stand.
  13. melons


    You're massive wrong uns, I'm nauseous just looking at some of those images and heights. Congratulations Bitch, still negged though. Can't believe you're going to be like, proper unavailable. She must be incredibly special. X Anyway, my mountain climb this morning... ha, as if. My mountain view when taking dick head rescue dog out for his walk at 8 this morning... Aran mountain range from Llyn Tegid.
  14. melons

    Police are cunts

    The fact that not all things or people respond appropriately, the guy wasn't aggressive, he was hardly a threat, so no. No you don't get to justify or make a snide comment as though it's ok to taser and boot someone because he'd been given enough warnings. You wouldn't boot shit out of your dog or taser it if it didn't respond the way you wanted it, why is it ok to do it to a human being?
  15. melons

    Police are cunts

    How many warnings does your dog get before you taser it and kick it while its down?