Lapdancing bars

[Elmyn Noos]

Anyone frequent one? I'd never been to one in England before until last night as thought them a bit seedy. However, ended up in Silks in Leeds last night and have to say my opinion has changed. The birds were fit as fuck, there was no hard sell for a dance, and they were happy to stand and chat with you at the bar. I shall be certainly be going back.

[Mike84]

Don't go to x in the city in Liverpool. It's shit.

[Flying Pig]

Advice to lap dance virgins.

 

1. Always pay for individual dances and never together as this ruins the opportunity to watch the artistry of the dances that your mates have paid to oggle before splurging your fiver on some other bint.

 

2. Never wank in the bar.

 

Hope this helps.

 

 

PS. I actually find them a bit intimidating.

[TheBitch]

Lapdancing bars are ace, the birds always smell so good.

 

 

Oh and look good too.

[Charles Penrose]

I went to Spearmint Rhino a couple of years ago where I was talked into having one of them there lap dances.

 

To be honest I felt thoroughly uncomfortable throughout the entire process. Little Chris didn't even twitch.

 

Had to laugh at my mate walking out and telling that he got on 'really well' with the girl who had been rubbing against him for £25 a time. That's probably why he had something like five lap dances from her in less than an hour.

 

And then there was the Russian girl who spent half hour trying to get me to have a lap dance from her, telling me tales of her homeland. When I proceeded to tell her I was out of cash she turned away and in the broadest Birmingham accent imaginable said to her colleague: "He a rooooiiiiggghhhhtttt bloody cheapskate he is".

[Yerma'satexan!]

Went to one called 4Play whilst bladdered in Budapest after the Debrecin game. My mate (who posts on here under Mr. Beast) got a private dance in a room. He came back a little flustered. He told us he was starting to fall asleep mid dance. He then awoke to find the girl bent right over with her drawers down and her arse in his face, he shit himself (probably thought he was gonna be accused of something or other) pulled her drawers up on her and left the room. Good times.

[Elite]

Never been to one and don't see the point.

 

There is no pleasure element to it. If I have a naked lady infront of me, I want to shag her or knock one off over her. Not just watch.

[robbief]

Been to the pen and wig a few times. They do smell good, they use body lotion before they come out.

 

It is a good laugh with the lads but the worst tease ever. Rather get my bird to strip off for me and know i'm actually gna get my end away!

[TheBitch]

Went to one called 4Play whilst bladdered in Budapest after the Debrecin game. My mate (who posts on here under Mr. Beast) got a private dance in a room. He came back a little flustered. He told us he was starting to fall asleep mid dance. He then awoke to find the girl bent right over with her drawers down and her arse in his face' date=' he shit himself (probably thought he was gonna be accused of something or other) pulled her drawers up on her and left the room. Good times.[/quote']

 

Mr.Beast should be negged for that really.

[AVEEZ]

I have entertained clients in the following lap dancing bars in Leeds and had a thoroughly good time -

 

Blue Coyote

Red Leopard

and Purple Door (albeit not been in here for an age nor aware if it s still open!)

Buffalo Lounge

 

I have never been in SIlks but I'm guessing they are much of a muchness - especially when you are putting it through on expenses!!!

 

The drinks are way over priced buit the girls are in my experience v beautiful and v friendly even to those not wanting to have dances!

 

The worst thing about these places are the desperados in there as its the nearest they ever get to a piece of skirt!

[Ezekiel 25:17]

They're ok, I've been maybe ten times in the last ten years, the last time I qwent though it was shit, I don't know why but I got nothing out of it at all, was just bored and wanting her to finish.

[odris]

Theres something about a bunch of men all within close proximity and all sporting a semi that weirds me out, I don't know, it might just be me.

[dirty_sanchez]

I spent several hundred quid on them on my stag do. One of them hit me in the balls with a belt. It hurt a lot and I folded up on the stage in front of all the other punters.

[mattyq]

I've been to a few for stag dos etc. Always had a laugh although the best ones are in Bulgaria as they encourage groping, which is nice

[Wor Horse]

They're shite.

[rondeco]

Lap-dancing bars? Full of tits..

[Mel Wood]

Woudn't go to one here for some reason, but my cousin owned one in New Jersey so spent many happy nights in there.

 

Club Hello in Budapest was alright, on my stag weekend, but my private dance was poorly timed, clashing with the lesbian snake show on stage at the same time.

 

Still, you lives and learns. Delay the private one till ten past and get both shows. Kerching! This advise was brought to you by Skinflint Pervs & Co.

[piscinin]

Should come over here, you can shag them too if you want. If you're really lucky, like a bloke at a place where I used to work was, you get to watch yourself in action on the local news channel the following day.

[Guest PurpleNose]

Never been to one and don't see the point.

 

There is no pleasure element to it. If I have a naked lady infront of me, I want to shag her or knock one off over her. Not just watch.

 

This is also my view.

[The Great Jacko]

This is also my view.

 

Should get yourself over to Toronto. The clubs near the airport are the best. I went to one that was just great - pool talbes with blokes in checked shirts playing pool and businessmen in front of a big stage being propositioned by the birds. Brilliantly - for no apparant reason that I could fathom, the birds make a decision when you take up their offer of a dance and either go to a darkly lit area to the left of the stage or a brightly lit area to the right.

 

A FRIEND OF MINE went left twice - first time had a bit of a dance then got a noshing - second time there was no dancing just unzipped the jeans, got the old fella out and rode him like a bucking bronco - happy days. For that person.

 

If you went right you just got a normal dance with maybe a chance to feed the pony if you were lucky. Weird but great.

[Johnni]

Woudn't go to one here for some reason, but my cousin owned one in New Jersey so spent many happy nights in there.

 

 

I just find the whole concept of sitting there whilst a naked woman dances in front of you with her arse in your face and you can't do nothing quite uncomfortable & annoying.

[Mr. Beast]

Went to one called 4Play whilst bladdered in Budapest after the Debrecin game. My mate (who posts on here under Mr. Beast) got a private dance in a room. He came back a little flustered. He told us he was starting to fall asleep mid dance. He then awoke to find the girl bent right over with her drawers down and her arse in his face' date=' he shit himself (probably thought he was gonna be accused of something or other) pulled her drawers up on her and left the room. Good times.[/quote']

 

AHEM!

 

I should make it clear this is complete defamation of my good character. i didn't pull up any pants apart (sic) from my own here. I was having a dance, didn't realy want one - i fancied her mate, but she asked me twice so i went along with it- getting quite physical then she starts pulling my pants down - i'm like 'hold on i'm a gentlemen pervert, easy!' she counters by whispering in my ear "i'm really fcked up" that was enough - i have a strict moral code - and yeah, i was a little fazed by it all. still harbour a certain amount of regret. also it was before the game, not after. after and proceedings may have been different or exactly as you described actually!

 

it's a moral mindfield till you get a boner or get scared.

 

PS. Yerma'satexan! asked a girl to shit in his hands. FACT.

[Paisley Red]

AHEM!

 

I should make it clear this is complete defamation of my good character. i didn't pull up any pants apart (sic) from my own here. I was having a dance, didn't realy want one - i fancied her mate, but she asked me twice so i went along with it- getting quite physical then she starts pulling my pants down - i'm like 'hold on i'm a gentlemen pervert, easy!' she counters by whispering in my ear "i'm really fcked up" that was enough - i have a strict moral code - and yeah, i was a little fazed by it all. still harbour a certain amount of regret. also it was before the game, not after. after and proceedings may have been different or exactly as you described actually!

 

it's a moral mindfield till you get a boner or get scared.

 

PS. Yerma'satexan! asked a girl to shit in his hands. FACT.

 

Laughing out loud at that mate, genius post. So, Yerma'satexan!, tell us about this shit catching request.

[Mr. Beast]

Laughing out loud at that mate, genius post. So, Yerma'satexan!, tell us about this shit catching request.

 

 

he's probably gonna be too drunk to use a keyboard for the next 36hrs so i must at this point admit i may have been a little creative with the truth there.

 

he did deny the advances of many a young lady asking for a dance - coz he has a girlfriend and he reads schopanauer or some shit like that. he also refused to buy a mate a "Surprise Show" for 100 euro. COMPLETE HOMO!

[drewy]

At this moment in time I'm in Patong, Phuket, shove your English lap dancing bars up your arse.

 

Only 8 days to go what a bastard!