The world of a woman.

[Trumo]

after 12 fucking days her mum, the ratty cuntflap fucked off.

 

Freedom.

 

Pirates?

[PestiRed]

after 12 fucking days her mum, the ratty cuntflap fucked off.

 

Freedom.

To be fair, it's a long journey from Somalia to Norway so she's not just going to stay a day or two

[Bjornebye]

after 12 fucking days her mum, the ratty cuntflap fucked off.

 

Freedom.

Ratty cuntflap?

 

You aren't Somalian

[General Dryness]

Ratty cuntflap?

 

You aren't Somalian

Yeah, if he'd gone for "sweat from a baboons balls" or "rhinoceros pizzle" it would have been more convincing.

[ZonkoVille77]

after 12 fucking days her mum, the ratty cuntflap fucked off.

 

Freedom.

Did you get a look at her grey pubes?

[PestiRed]

Just noticed that the house suddenly has small ceramic pigs everywhere. Asked the missus and they are traditional good luck new year pigs (wtf?). Apparently we have done this every year for the past seven years.

 

I'm sure she's fucking with my head and somewhere there is a world of man thread where she's laughing at me

[chrisbonnie]

Get your missus a hobby.

Scrolling through the thread having a good laugh and I come across this.

 

Being honest, how many women actually have hobbies?

 

I know they like to say they have to cook the dinner, so how could they possibly have the time. But honestly. Does the average woman have a hobby?

 

I asked my missus for weeks before Christmas. "fancy getting yourself a hobby, then it would make it easier to get you something for Christmas". As ever, the script came out. "how could I possibly hand time for a hobby because I have to cook YOUR DINNER"

 

I don't know any man that doesn't have a hobby, not bloody one. But women, I honestly don't know one woman with a hobby. Who the fuck would be happy with this as their life sequence.

 

Wake up, drive to work. Sit all day at a desk. Drive home, make dinner, watch emmerdale.

 

That's it. We've evolved from monkey's yet somehow stopped at that :blink:

[Trumo]

Scrolling through the thread having a good laugh and I come across this.

 

Being honest, how many women actually have hobbies?

 

I know they like to say they have to cook the dinner, so how could they possibly have the time. But honestly. Does the average woman have a hobby?

 

I asked my missus for weeks before Christmas. "fancy getting yourself a hobby, then it would make it easier to get you something for Christmas". As ever, the script came out. "how could I possibly hand time for a hobby because I have to cook YOUR DINNER"

 

I don't know any man that doesn't have a hobby, not bloody one. But women, I honestly don't know one woman with a hobby. Who the fuck would be happy with this as their life sequence.

 

Wake up, drive to work. Sit all day at a desk. Drive home, make dinner, watch emmerdale.

 

That's it. We've evolved from monkey's yet somehow stopped at that :blink:

 

She could cut out Emmerdale you know. I'll let YOU tell her that!

[Guest davelfc]

Being honest, how many women actually have hobbies?

 

 

A lot of men have hobbies because it gives them an excuse to spend time away from their partners. It also saves some of that hard earned cash from being spent on hanging baskets and candles. 

 

How any woman cannot find the time for a hobby is a mystery, tap tap, whirr whirr, bing! Being the average cooking skills these days. I mean they have washing machines, dish washers, tumble dryers, vacuum cleaners. There are no coal fires to clean out, no brass doorstep to polish. Food is delivered to the door, vegetables supplied pre cut and meals ready to eat at the flick of a microwave.

 

The job of housewife has been almost completely automated but apparently it still retains the same 'hard work' job description.

 

I suppose it's pretty hard to fit in a hobby when you're trying to fit in a whole day of shit tv and gossip.

 

Now I realise that what I have written is completely sexist at first glance and that there are many men that are single or stay at home fathers. I've yet to hear one complain or big up the job of cleaning a modern home. In fact having done the job myself I would say that it's pretty easy these days and I'd be embarrassed to mention it as an excuse for not being able to spend 8 hours doing something else.

[stringvest]

I understand some lads have kids with these people and have to find a way around it but, seriously, if you haven't then why on earth don't you just tell these people to stop acting like cunts or fuck off?

 

Right on brother.  Stig, you need to listen to the flame-haired Virginia Ironside.  

[Chairman Meow]

Ratty cuntflap?

 

You aren't Somalian

 

Fucking hell another person on this nightcat isn't Somalian thing. He so clearly is Somalian, I mean his stories are so convincing and all that.

[Liverpool lad]

Scrolling through the thread having a good laugh and I come across this.

 

Being honest, how many women actually have hobbies?

 

I know they like to say they have to cook the dinner, so how could they possibly have the time. But honestly. Does the average woman have a hobby?

 

I asked my missus for weeks before Christmas. "fancy getting yourself a hobby, then it would make it easier to get you something for Christmas". As ever, the script came out. "how could I possibly hand time for a hobby because I have to cook YOUR DINNER"

 

I don't know any man that doesn't have a hobby, not bloody one. But women, I honestly don't know one woman with a hobby. Who the fuck would be happy with this as their life sequence.

 

Wake up, drive to work. Sit all day at a desk. Drive home, make dinner, watch emmerdale.

 

That's it. We've evolved from monkey's yet somehow stopped at that :blink:

I used to go out with a girl who was a bit dull. Traded her in for one who is a keen horse rider so I can go to Birmingham on the 17th for a piss up and she will go riding. We will then do something on the Sunday together. Radical I know

[chrisbonnie]

I used to go out with a girl who was a bit dull. Traded her in for one who is a keen horse rider so I can go to Birmingham on the 17th for a piss up and she will go riding. We will then do something on the Sunday together. Radical I know

Horse riding. An expensive hobby. But a hobby none the less.

 

You lucky bastard.

[Dr Nowt]

Mine's always remarked on it as a plus point of mine that I encourage her to go out with her mates*, on weekends away abroad with them*, go to a mate's to get pissed, watch a film and stay over*, etc, rather than fly off the handle and demand she spends all her time with me.

 

Even allowing for the fact her exes are presumably bellends if they didn't do similar, what the fuck is it all about that her mates also comment how I'm so easy going and it's great I let her do whatever she wants?  It can't be that rare?

 

Win/win, surely?

 

* Yes I know she's really dogging/at a bukkake party/having an affair with my brother and everyone he knows, etc. 

[Rico1304]

Mine's always remarked on it as a plus point of mine that I encourage her to go out with her mates*, on weekends away abroad with them*, go to a mate's to get pissed, watch a film and stay over*, etc, rather than fly off the handle and demand she spends all her time with me.

 

Even allowing for the fact her exes are presumably bellends if they didn't do similar, what the fuck is it all about that her mates also comment how I'm so easy going and it's great I let her do whatever she wants?  It can't be that rare?

 

Win/win, surely?

 

* Yes I know she's really dogging/at a bukkake party/having an affair with my brother and everyone he knows, etc.

 

Auto reply

 

Hi, thanks for your message, I'm afraid I'm at a dogging session with Lizzie's bird at the moment so can't reply.

 

In my absence please contact Dennis at TLW as he's the only one not invited.

 

I'll get back to you next week.

[Harry Squatter]

It took ages for one of my ex birds to get her head round the fact that I played 5 a side and went boxing training during the week. Her so called hobbies consisted of going round to her mums and sisters house and talking about her family to them. She would then go home and watch the soaps. It got to the point where she said she had to fit in around me and demanded to see me on one of the nights I was training.

 

I asked her why I had to see her on that particular night when I was free other nights but she demanded to see me on that night just to prove a stupid pathetic point to herself.

 

My mates ex wife hated him playing footy on a Saturday and issued an ultimatum to him "it's football or me". He said "can you get my boots for me, I think they are under the stairs"

[RoboRiise]

Just noticed that the house suddenly has small ceramic pigs everywhere. Asked the missus and they are traditional good luck new year pigs (wtf?). Apparently we have done this every year for the past seven years.

 

I'm sure she's fucking with my head and somewhere there is a world of man thread where she's laughing at me

 

Good job Remmie doesn't do this.  Pigs out all over the house.

[A Red]

I know a couple of blokes that stopped going out once they were in serious relationships. They were worried their birds would pull someone else if they went out and therefore figured if they didnt go out their women couldnt either. Not that they admitted it.

 

Surprise,  surprise once single the phone would be ringing.

[Harry Squatter]

I know a couple of blokes that stopped going out once they were in serious relationships. They were worried their birds would pull someone else if they went out and therefore figured if they didnt go out their women couldnt either. Not that they admitted it.

 

Surprise, surprise once single the phone would be ringing.

One of my mates started seeing some bird and became a total lapdog. Wouldn't go anywhere or do anything. Jibbed me off loads of times to keep his bird happy so I just never bothered ringing him again.

 

Never saw him for six months then he texts me out the blue asking to come out on the pull in town. I asked why he wanted to do that when he was all loved up but he said "oh she fucked me off last week". I just laughed and hung up on him.

[Liverpool lad]

Works well. She looks at the fixtures and plans her hobby around it. Groundbreaking

 

And horseriding isn't cheap but her spending money stops all that resentment that stupid couples have.

 

Relationship guru me

[Dr Nowt]

Auto reply

 

Hi, thanks for your message, I'm afraid I'm at a dogging session with Lizzie's bird at the moment so can't reply.

 

In my absence please contact Dennis at TLW as he's the only one not invited.

 

I'll get back to you next week.

 

Try and get her to stay overnight will you, mate?

[Liverpool lad]

It took ages for one of my ex birds to get her head round the fact that I played 5 a side and went boxing training during the week. Her so called hobbies consisted of going round to her mums and sisters house and talking about her family to them. She would then go home and watch the soaps. It got to the point where she said she had to fit in around me and demanded to see me on one of the nights I was training.

 

I asked her why I had to see her on that particular night when I was free other nights but she demanded to see me on that night just to prove a stupid pathetic point to herself.

 

My mates ex wife hated him playing footy on a Saturday and issued an ultimatum to him "it's football or me". He said "can you get my boots for me, I think they are under the stairs"

There is normally a disgruntled mother in the background saying 'he is walking all over you' because I am having a pint.

[Chairman Meow]

Try and get her to stay overnight will you, mate?

 

It's fine, I'm picking her up and taking her round to the Household Cavalry once the boys are done. 

[Dr Nowt]

It's fine, I'm picking her up and taking her round to the Household Cavalry once the boys are done. 

 

Good man.  Not back before 12:00 Sunday, thanks.  Make sure she's cleaned her teeth.

[Rushies tash]

Mine's always remarked on it as a plus point of mine that I encourage her to go out with her mates*, on weekends away abroad with them*, go to a mate's to get pissed, watch a film and stay over*, etc, rather than fly off the handle and demand she spends all her time with me.

 

Even allowing for the fact her exes are presumably bellends if they didn't do similar, what the fuck is it all about that her mates also comment how I'm so easy going and it's great I let her do whatever she wants?  It can't be that rare?

 

Win/win, surely?

 

* Yes I know she's really dogging/at a bukkake party/having an affair with my brother and everyone he knows, etc.

 

Mines out on the lash tonight with one of her mates. She always asks out of courtesy, but she knows it'll be a yes. Same the other way round, she almost kicks me out the door. We spend a lot if time together, so it's good to have a break - though her friends also say 'how good I am' for 'letting her out'.