El Dangerous

Above all else he’s a Tory. Fuck Harry Kane.

Big fan of the Colombians.

I don’t for one second believe that Real would want that contract back on their books. He’s the archetypical luxury player.

Do one of Klopp and Mbappe doing dad and lad stuff with Mbappe in one of those strapped in baby carriers.

THE REACH OF HIS ARMS!

I’d take the fat tranny shagging version just for shits and giggles tbh.

Who bought Anubis the Stephen Fry joke book?

For the forward position I’d like a more conventional central forward with room to develop. Mane, Mo, and Jota all offer the same kind of threat. Bobby sews it all together and Origi is supposed to be the wild card. If we’re replacing Origi in that bunch then someone like Isak makes perfect sense. He’s quick and mobile enough to not slow down the others but he’s a bit different. You don’t see it at the quoted £60m or whatever but who knows what voodoo hoodoo Magic Mike can work. I did see a low scoring Brazilian at Hertha linked and he looked every bit the Bobby lite I could imagine us going for as well.

We also won’t do release clauses anymore either which was a deal breaker with Haaland moving from Salzburg.

Sign Mbappe on a free next year, give him £1m per week plus £50m sign on bonus spread across a 5 year contract. Sell him within a week for £200m sign Haaland for £70m plus £20m sign on and £500k per week. Buy a top top third choice goalkeeper with the profits.

Whether Mbappe leaves this year or next he’s becoming the highest paid player in the world. Either way it won’t be at our club.

I think it’s much fairer to compare him to Minamino, a player of similar physicality and position than it is to a generational talent. We didn’t sign Mane when he left them either, if Daka is any good we’ll pay double when we know what we’re getting for our money.

Shame about Daka, you wouldn’t mind taking the chance on him for the price of what we’ll get for big Div and Wilson but you wonder in the club will have reservations after Minamino. Maybe the thinking is that if we can get Neuhaus for a reasonable fee we can go a bit bigger on a forward.

What Leeds you to this conclusion?

Rafa wouldn’t even wave to his own kids at Sports Day.