What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

[Evelyn Tentions]

20 hours ago, Barrington Womble said:

I went back to ddk in pimlico this week. The choice of 1 sausage was mine - the breakfast comes with one of stuff and you top it up. 12 quid including tea. There was pretty much nothing wrong with it at all, I couldn't find anything I'd have changed really, except the white pudding was small, so I might have doubled that. All good quality food, all well cooked. And for you weird non-beaners, the beans are in a pot. I don't think I can ever give anything a 10 as the search for the perfect cooked breakfast would be over. But this is as good as I've had in a long enough time I can't recall a better one. And for that part of the world, pretty good value. 

 

 

Fucking disgusting.

Beans have no place on a fry up, whether you like them or not. A cheap plate filler introducrd by cheap transport caffs in London to fill the plate at minimal cost.Tasteless lumps of starch flavoured by a revolting imitation tomato glop full of chemical additives.

Potato things have only been used for the last few years, reconstituted mash held together by addittives. Used because its easier than making a proper fried bread slice.

That black pudding looks like it was cut with a bacon slicer. If it was any thinner you'd be able to see the plate through it.What happened to proper black puddings like this. At least the same size as the bags of meat flavoured bread crumbs sold as sausages.

[YorkshireRed]

6 minutes ago, Evelyn Tentions said:

Fucking disgusting.

Beans have no place on a fry up, whether you like them or not. A cheap plate filler introducrd by cheap transport caffs in London to fill the plate at minimal cost.Tasteless lumps of starch flavoured by a revolting imitation tomato glop full of chemical additives.

Potato things have only been used for the last few years, reconstituted mash held together by addittives. Used because its easier than making a proper fried bread slice.

That black pudding looks like it was cut with a bacon slicer. If it was any thinner you'd be able to see the plate through it.What happened to proper black puddings like this. At least the same size as the bags of meat flavoured bread crumbs sold as sausages.

Are you suggesting this purple item, resembling a dog turd is edible?

[TheHowieLama]

15 hours ago, Evelyn Tentions said:

 

Finding this thread easier to masturbate to.

[Remmie]

8 hours ago, TheHowieLama said:

Finding this thread easier to masturbate to.

Purple turds are your thing? Each to their own

[Bob]

Breakfast this morning, sat overlooking Loch Oich, beside the well of the seven heads and it’s memorial, in a beautiful roadside cafe garden, associated with the “well of the seven heads cafe”

 

I had the full Scottish, missus had the veggie.

 

mine was 1 egg, 2 bacon, 2 sausages, haggis, black pudding, toast, potato scone and beans.

 

mark off for serving in a box irrespective of whether taking away or eating here in the garden. Mark off for the toast being cheap bread and under toasted. Finally a mark off for the haggis really not being very nice (to my pallate), otherwise very good effort. Super bacon and sausage, good egg. 
 

lovely way to get the day started, and a 7/10 breakkie to boot.

 

 

[Bjornebye]

Beautiful scenery although it looks like the seven heads took turns head butting your breakfast before it was served 

[Pidge]

Is that bean juice loose in the box?!

[Tony Moanero]

On 23/08/2021 at 09:02, Spy Bee said:

I've gradually, but definitely gone off a full fry-up. I now like smashed avocado, scrambled eggs and crispy bacon on toast, with a healthy splash of tabasco sauce. 

Negged, especially for “smashed”.

[Tony Moanero]

1 hour ago, Bob Spunkmouse said:

 

Lovely view, shit breakfast.

[YorkshireRed]

1 hour ago, Bob Spunkmouse said:

Breakfast this morning, sat overlooking Loch Oich, beside the well of the seven heads and it’s memorial, in a beautiful roadside cafe garden, associated with the “well of the seven heads cafe”

 

I had the full Scottish, missus had the veggie.

 

mine was 1 egg, 2 bacon, 2 sausages, haggis, black pudding, toast, potato scone and beans.

 

mark off for serving in a box irrespective of whether taking away or eating here in the garden. Mark off for the toast being cheap bread and under toasted. Finally a mark off for the haggis really not being very nice (to my pallate), otherwise very good effort. Super bacon and sausage, good egg. 
 

lovely way to get the day started, and a 7/10 breakkie to boot.

 

 

10/10 for the view.

 

Nine points lost immediately for being served in a box.

 

A further three point reduction for the warm bread. 
 

Bacon, Sausage and Egg are worth five points. 
 

Potato effort one point as you’re abroad.

 

Attempting to hide the beans, minus three.

 

Total = 1/10.

[Bruce Spanner]

@Tony Moanero

 

When you were at your heifer stage what was on your breakfast plate.

 

Quantities please?

[YorkshireRed]

I thought I’d treat my youngest to a fancy lunch at Morrison’s Supermarket Cafe. His choice…

 

A breakfast.

[Tony Moanero]

15 minutes ago, Bruce Spanner said:

@Tony Moanero

 

When you were at your heifer stage what was on your breakfast plate.

 

Quantities please?

6 sausages 

4 rashers of bacon

3 fried eggs

4 generous slices of black pudding

300g mushrooms

2 tomatoes

4 slices of toast

2 slices of fried bread

 

1 litre of apple juice

 

[Captain Turdseye]

23 minutes ago, YorkshireRed said:

10/10 for the view.

 

Nine points lost immediately for being served in a box.

 

A further three point reduction for the warm bread. 
 

Bacon, Sausage and Egg are worth five points. 
 

Potato effort one point as you’re abroad.

 

Attempting to hide the beans, minus three.

 

Total = 1/10.

 

6 minutes ago, YorkshireRed said:

I thought I’d treat my youngest to a fancy lunch at Morrison’s Supermarket Cafe. His choice…

 

A breakfast.

That’s the first time I’ve ever laughed at one of your breakfast critiques. Repped. 
 

Then I scroll down two posts and see that you had to go and squander it. 

[Tony Moanero]

6 minutes ago, YorkshireRed said:

I thought I’d treat my youngest to a fancy lunch at Morrison’s Supermarket Cafe. His choice…

 

A breakfast.

A treat? I dread to think what you give him as punishment when he misbehaves!

[Paulie Dangerously]

1 hour ago, Bob Spunkmouse said:

Breakfast this morning, sat overlooking Loch Oich, beside the well of the seven heads and it’s memorial, in a beautiful roadside cafe garden, associated with the “well of the seven heads cafe”

 

I had the full Scottish, missus had the veggie.

 

mine was 1 egg, 2 bacon, 2 sausages, haggis, black pudding, toast, potato scone and beans.

 

mark off for serving in a box irrespective of whether taking away or eating here in the garden. Mark off for the toast being cheap bread and under toasted. Finally a mark off for the haggis really not being very nice (to my pallate), otherwise very good effort. Super bacon and sausage, good egg. 
 

lovely way to get the day started, and a 7/10 breakkie to boot.

 

 

Every item floating on the beans. DISCUSTING

[Captain Turdseye]

5 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

6 sausages 

4 bacon

3 fires eggs

4 generous slices of black pudding

300g mushrooms

4 tomatoes

4 slices of toast

2 slices of fried bread

 

1 litre of apple juice

 

That’s roughly what I’ll eat if we have a fry up at home. But with no black pudding (she can’t cook it properly) and with beans (lots of them) instead of tomatoes. 

[Captain Turdseye]

Did you have anything @YorkshireRed or did you just sit there commentating on his?
 

“Look at the state of that sausage. You should be ashamed of yourself, you sick fuck”

 

”The bacon isn’t even cooked. Would have been better for you if we’d gone ahead with the abortion”

[Bjornebye]

15 minutes ago, YorkshireRed said:

I thought I’d treat my youngest to a fancy lunch at Morrison’s Supermarket Cafe. His choice…

 

A breakfast.

 

 

[Captain Turdseye]

They could have at least given him a clean plate. 

[Bruce Spanner]

13 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

6 sausages 

4 rashers of bacon

3 fried eggs

4 generous slices of black pudding

300g mushrooms

2 tomatoes

4 slices of toast

2 slices of fried bread

 

1 litre of apple juice

 

 

Amazing, cheers, T.

 

6 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

That’s roughly what I’ll eat if we have a fry up at home. But with no black pudding (she can’t cook it properly) and with beans (lots of them) instead of tomatoes. 

 

Really, mine would be two bacon, one sausage, one egg, fried slice, tomato, a couple of toast and maybe beans, depends on how I feel and that's me in a food coma for the rest of the morning/afternoon.

 

I feel emasculated by you two real men.

[Mudface]

18 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

6 sausages 

4 rashers of bacon

3 fried eggs

4 generous slices of black pudding

300g mushrooms

2 tomatoes

4 slices of toast

2 slices of fried bread

 

1 litre of apple juice

 

Christ- apple juice is full of sugar, ditch that.

[Captain Turdseye]

1 minute ago, Bruce Spanner said:

 

Amazing, cheers, T.

 

 

Really, mine would be two bacon, one sausage, one egg, fried slice, tomato, a couple of toast and maybe beans, depends on how I feel and that's me in a food coma for the rest of the morning/afternoon.

 

I feel emasculated by you two real men.

On the rare occasions we have a fry-up at home it’s usually an evening meal, so the food coma thing isn’t an issue. 

[Tony Moanero]

1 minute ago, Bruce Spanner said:

 

Amazing, cheers, T.

 

 

Really, mine would be two bacon, one sausage, one egg, fried slice, tomato, a couple of toast and maybe beans, depends on how I feel and that's me in a food coma for the rest of the morning/afternoon.

 

I feel emasculated by you two real men.

Nowadays, I’d have two or three sausages, two rashers of bacon, two slices of black pudding, mushrooms, two tomatoes and a couple of slices of toast.

[Bruce Spanner]

24 minutes ago, YorkshireRed said:

I thought I’d treat my youngest to a fancy lunch at Morrison’s Supermarket Cafe. His choice…

 

A breakfast.

 

What is this 'matter' here?

 

 

I'm seconding the social services call.