Spare a thought for Everton

[Ezekiel 25:17]

EVERY CLUB WANTS TO BE EVERTON.

[stringvest]

 

Look at this Mum. LOOK AT IT!!! You made me give up my education, my dream to become the manager of a large regional department store, the respect of my peers, my colleagues and my neighbours. Just because when I was 14 I was good at football. I listened to you. I believed in your dreams. AND LOOK WHERE IT GOT ME! I HOPE YOU ROT IN HELL!

[SCOUSE TAPAS]

The thing is with Everton is they are genuine unflushable turds.The amount of times they should of gone down(considering there squad)and they never do.

 

Infact they somehow end up finishing top 10 most seasons.

 

They sell players and very rarely buy any,they pick up some good players who are injury prone(saha,yak)and somehow go on unbeaten runs playing shit football.

 

There ground pre dates the bible,there chairmen dosent have a clue and they have about 2 players worth any money(how cahill is still there is beyond belief).

 

Surely there luck has to dry up soon and the unflushable turd that is Everton is finally flushed down to the lower tier of the game.

[Jennings]

August 31st 2011 will live long in the memory for me, as it was the day that I decided to stop investing my money in Everton football club.

 

Let me say though, blah blah blah...

 

They're in his heart. They're in his soul.

[Whelan]

I have just realised who he looks like!

 

Mental Mickey from Only Fools and Horses

 

[silverlining]

Look at this Mum. LOOK AT IT!!! You made me give up my education, my dream to become the manager of a large regional department store, the respect of my peers, my colleagues and my neighbours. Just because when I was 14 I was good at football. I listened to you. I believed in your dreams. AND LOOK WHERE IT GOT ME! I HOPE YOU ROT IN HELL!

 

There is no way that he hasn't killed and eaten several people.

 

He makes Richard Ramirez look like Richard Attenbrough

[silverlining]

I just had this e-mail from my brother:

 

"Mikky was my favourite player for several seasons but he hasn't looked his old self for a long time now and at 29 , £10m £12m is decent enough and we lose his £75k pw.

 

Beckford was terrific business. A free signing, 10 goals plus a return of £3m to £4.5m is to be applauded. He was never going to be a real force as a Premiership striker.

 

Yak? We all sang Feed the Yak and he took that too literally. Fat purple Aki. He was a decent striker a few seasons back but has been dead weight for a while now. £1.5m plus what/ £40k pw off the wage bill was the right thing to do.

 

We need pace in the side and Drenthe appears to have it in abundance. Also signed the top striker in Argentina League

 

Seems to me that yesterday might perhaps prove to be a really good day for EFC……I HOPE"

 

Poor lad.

[Einch]

The thing is with Everton is they are genuine unflushable turds.The amount of times they should of gone down(considering there squad)and they never do.

 

Infact they somehow end up finishing top 10 most seasons.

 

They sell players and very rarely buy any,they pick up some good players who are injury prone(saha,yak)and somehow go on unbeaten runs playing shit football.

 

There ground pre dates the bible,there chairmen dosent have a clue and they have about 2 players worth any money(how cahill is still there is beyond belief).

 

Surely there luck has to dry up soon and the unflushable turd that is Everton is finally flushed down to the lower tier of the game.

 

Excellent stuff. There is a precedent for flushing unflushable turds as Coventry City did this for a while before finally accepting their fate. As the game has become more polarised I would expect, and hope, that what took 5 bad seasons to accomplish for Coventry will take only two, please god make it only one, for the bittersh.

[Anubis]

I just had this e-mail from my brother:

 

"Mikky was my favourite player for several seasons but he hasn't looked his old self for a long time now and at 29 , £10m £12m is decent enough and we lose his £75k pw.

 

Beckford was terrific business. A free signing, 10 goals plus a return of £3m to £4.5m is to be applauded. He was never going to be a real force as a Premiership striker.

 

Yak? We all sang Feed the Yak and he took that too literally. Fat purple Aki. He was a decent striker a few seasons back but has been dead weight for a while now. £1.5m plus what/ £40k pw off the wage bill was the right thing to do.

 

We need pace in the side and Drenthe appears to have it in abundance. Also signed the top striker in Argentina League

 

Seems to me that yesterday might perhaps prove to be a really good day for EFC……I HOPE"

 

Poor lad.

 

At least the asylum lets him write to you.

[The Acolyte]

My favourite part of that Argie guy is that Leicester City had him on trial... and thought he was rubbish.

 

Thats true a bitter told me that as well when i commented on the Argie possibly being a good signing. Even their own fans don't hold out much hope for this guy!

[The Acolyte]

Is it true that the day before Everton's one and only home friendly against Villareal pre-season just gone they went and painted the seats the DAY BEFORE the game so had to close the main stand due to wet paint, thus losing out on revenue. Some bitters told me that but I just can't believe them!

[AquiMan]

Theres a Bluenose protest in town over Kenwright today

[AquiMan]

Is it true that the day before Everton's one and only home friendly against Villareal pre-season just gone they went and painted the seats the DAY BEFORE the game so had to close the main stand due to wet paint, thus losing out on revenue. Some bitters told me that but I just can't believe them!

 

It sure is, kenwrights got them business brains don't ya know

[Section_31]

Been a distinct lack of ribbing from blueshite of late. They're in that wonderful headspace where they know they're shit and can't risk getting into a football discussion. Enjoy it while it lasts, although all blues have a clever built in redundency which kicks in when times are tough, they all have a 'proxy club' and a 'proxy player'. They'll tell you they think Liverpool are shit, you'll explain why they're not but how Evertone really are shit - at which point they'll say something like 'That Sergio Aguero though, some player him, bet you wish you had someone like him.'

 

Bitters argue like women.

 

"You cheated on me with my brother."

 

"Yeah well ten years ago my mum asked you if you wanted some toast and you said no."

[Dougie Do'ins]

Is it true that the day before Everton's one and only home friendly against Villareal pre-season just gone they went and painted the seats the DAY BEFORE the game so had to close the main stand due to wet paint, thus losing out on revenue. Some bitters told me that but I just can't believe them!

They did paint the seats but the story of them losing money because of it is shite. They would only have lost out on revenue had there been people getting turned away at the turnstiles due to lack of seats. Anyone who watched or was at the Vilareal game will confirm, there was an abundance of empty seats in the attendance of 16,682.

[sir roger]

It's not all gloom for the Blooze, they are in for James Beattie as a free agent.

 

I can't imagine he has lost weight since he left Goodison.

[The Acolyte]

They did paint the seats but the story of them losing money because of it is shite. They would only have lost out on revenue had there been people getting turned away at the turnstiles due to lack of seats. Anyone who watched or was at the Vilareal game will confirm' date=' there was an abundance of empty seats in the attendance of 16,682.[/quote']

 

So they painted them knowing there was no one to sit in them?!

I would take the piss but I don't know what our attendance was for the Valencia game!

[firemarshall]

So they painted them knowing there was no one to sit in them?!

I would take the piss but I don't know what our attendance was for the Valencia game!

 

I reckon it was over thirty thousand

[GUS]

New Everton site - Everton Time

 

EvertonTime | The Last Time Everton FC Signed A Player

[Acid]

New Everton site - Everton Time

 

EvertonTime | The Last Time Everton FC Signed A Player

 

Surely that last time, if only to add to their argument, should be the last time they won the league?

[Strontium]

It's not all gloom for the Blooze, they are in for James Beattie as a free agent.

 

I can't imagine he has lost weight since he left Goodison.

 

 

I'm still hoping to see an emotional Goodison return for the presently unattached prodigal son, Francis Jeffers.

[Kopite]

"What do you mean this isn't Chelsea?"

[Dougie Do'ins]

So they painted them knowing there was no one to sit in them?!

I would take the piss but I don't know what our attendance was for the Valencia game!

36,606

[Chocoholic]

"What do you mean this isn't Chelsea?"

 

That pic has got "I've been HAD" all over it. Have you ever seen anyone so enthusiastic holding a shirt of their new club before? He hasn't even bothered to take off his jacket for the pic, he just can't be arsed to look any way bothered.

 

It looks like a line-up pic. "Is this the man holding the shirt you saw him with that day he mugge... I beg your pardon, the day you mugged him?"

[Unrighteous]

EVERY CLUB WANTS TO BE EVERTON.