THE TLW TAVERN (no virus talk allowed, just small talk pub bollocks)

[Bjornebye]

5 minutes ago, KMD7 said:

The lad on the left plays Kryten in Red Dwarf. 

 

How? he lost a leg in the Falklands 

[KMD7]

15 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

 

How? he lost a leg in the Falklands 

He has a spare

[Dave D]

19 hours ago, Clem H Fandango said:

is happy hour 6-8?

The new Brewery are telling us we have to be more inclusive and welcoming.

 

I didnt want to discriminate against Unhappy people so we now have "Unhappy" hour where drinks prices are doubled.

 

Its proved very popular     

[Bjornebye]

Anyone wanna buy a monkey? 

[Dave D]

26 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Anyone wanna buy a monkey? 

I might know someone but it would depend on what colour?

[Bjornebye]

7 minutes ago, Dave D said:

I might know someone but it would depend on what colour?

 

Green 

[Dave D]

5 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

 

Green 

He might take two off your hands.   

[Bjornebye]

Just now, Dave D said:

He might take two off your hands.   

 

I've only fucking got one what sort of caper do you think I'm running here 

[Dave D]

1 minute ago, Bjornebye said:

 

I've only fucking got one what sort of caper do you think I'm running here 

Ok. I'll ask a few of the regulars, although I think alot of them have already got one

 

[Strontium]

On 21/11/2022 at 16:41, Clem H Fandango said:

is happy hour 6-8?

 

6-8 is two hours, what kind of stunt are you trying to pull here?

[Dave D]

Packed in here tonight- going to have to make it one in one out 

 

[Rushies tash]

When does the quiz start?

[Dave D]

33 minutes ago, Rushies tash said:

When does the quiz start?

Quiz night is tomorrow- its World Cup themed.

 

Small hint- first question will be- 

List alphabetically  the nations participating that  allow head scarf wearing gay people that eat pork and drink beer?

 

NO shouting out the answer please

 

 

 

[VladimirIlyich]

3 hours ago, Dave D said:

Packed in here tonight- going to have to make it one in one out 

 

God,your clientelle are now carrying 'man bags.' The only thing a man should have in a bag is his testicles!

[AngryOfTuebrook]

4 hours ago, Strontium said:

 

6-8 is two hours, what kind of stunt are you trying to pull here?

I can't believe Rico lied to me.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

34 minutes ago, VladimirIlyich said:

God,your clientelle are now carrying 'man bags.' The only thing a man should have in a bag is his testicles!

Gone to the dogs, this place.

[VladimirIlyich]

1 minute ago, AngryOfTuebrook said:

Gone to the dogs, this place.

Dont insult the barmaid like that she's the only one who'll work here.

[Bjornebye]

10 minutes ago, AngryOfTuebrook said:

Gone to the dogs, this place.

Oy! One mans ale house is another mans lap dancing club 

[Caramac]

Who's that guy over by the window?

 

Sure I've seen him on tlw before. Can't quite put a name to him though...

 

[AngryOfTuebrook]

Just a pint of lime and soda for me please @Dave D.  I'm trying to do Dry January.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

On 21/11/2022 at 16:37, Bjornebye said:

De Jong is class 

 

[VladimirIlyich]

It looks like this place is empty and they've all gone to the Gay Disco down the road. I've even heard somebody has gone home to watch Love Actually on a pirate dvd. I think I sold him that! He'll be shocked to find its a whole series of Captain Pugwash though.

[Dave D]

11 hours ago, AngryOfTuebrook said:

Just a pint of lime and soda for me please @Dave D.  I'm trying to do Dry January.

Thats a relief- we had our license revoked after that guy brought all those horses in on New Years Eve. It was quiet at the time so it was suggested we had an impromptu "indoor grand national" 

I had my reservations but went with it. 

The atmosphere was great until someone lost a £3.50 bet when one of the horses pulled up and refused to jump the pile of tables near the finish line. 

Things got heated and next thing the pub was packed with police and VETS.

 

Due to get license back this weekend  

 

   

   

[TheHowieLama]

Thought this place got cancelled.

[Rushies tash]

Anyone know whose pound this is on the pool table?