little things that annoy the shit out of you

[VladimirIlyich]

7 hours ago, sir roger said:

I always imagine the Captain's shed to be based on Dexter's killing room.

Fixed.

 

[Bobby Hundreds]

Feels like every single job I need to do something goes wrong, simple thing like they'll send a wrong part or something is missing or the previous person who fixed something cut corners creating issues now.

 

The latest is windscreen wipers fuck you and fuck sites that say type in your reg and we will tell you what you need.

[Captain Turdseye]

Didn’t put my phone on charge properly last night. Gutted. 

[Trumo]

Mesh-backed office chairs. Barely any weight saving compared to a solid-backed chair, and the plastic behind the mesh is merely a dust trap as they collect an impressive amount of clothing fibre.

[Bob]

2 hours ago, Bobby Hundreds said:

Feels like every single job I need to do something goes wrong, simple thing like they'll send a wrong part or something is missing or the previous person who fixed something cut corners creating issues now.

 

The latest is windscreen wipers fuck you and fuck sites that say type in your reg and we will tell you what you need.

Had that with mine a while ago. Ended up being told I needed to order specially online, which I obviously didn't. Waited til I needed a service in the end.

[Harry's Lad]

5 minutes ago, Bob said:

Had that with mine a while ago. Ended up being told I needed to order specially online, which I obviously didn't. Waited til I needed a service in the end.

Or you could just get a refill from a motor factors. A five minute job and a fraction of the price.

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

2 hours ago, Bobby Hundreds said:

Feels like every single job I need to do something goes wrong, simple thing like they'll send a wrong part or something is missing or the previous person who fixed something cut corners creating issues now.

 

The latest is windscreen wipers fuck you and fuck sites that say type in your reg and we will tell you what you need.

Our house is like that, everything is a big rigmarole. Convinced her Ma cursed me when she died. A few cleansing rituals seemed to do the trick, next step would be a house blessing. 

[Bob]

1 hour ago, Harry's Lad said:

Or you could just get a refill from a motor factors. A five minute job and a fraction of the price.

It's all well and good typing that, but who knows what the fuck that means? Nobody. 

[Creator Supreme]

12 minutes ago, Bob said:

It's all well and good typing that, but who knows what the fuck that means? Nobody. 

I do.

[Harry's Lad]

23 minutes ago, Bob said:

It's all well and good typing that, but who knows what the fuck that means? Nobody. 

Have a good look at the wiper blade. Take a photo if necessary.

Take the old blade out of the frame, swap the sprung steel bars into a new rubber blade and reassemble making sure the blade is secure in the frame.

Use the old blade to measure the new one when you cut it.

It's piss easy mate.

 

 

[John102]

This popped into my head just now.

 

When you get those articles saying who the fastest football players are, then they compare their speed to Usain Bolt, when he broke the world record. 

 

They always compare the footy players top speed against Bolt's average across the entire race, including the standing start and when he is goosed at the end. May be alone on this.

 

And also GF Incels who neg footy chat.

[VladimirIlyich]

2 minutes ago, John102 said:

This popped into my head just now.

 

When you get those articles saying who the fastest football players are, then they compare their speed to Usain Bolt, when he broke the world record. 

 

They always compare the footy players top speed against Bolt's average across the entire race, including the standing start and when he is goosed at the end. May be alone on this.

 

And also GF Incels who neg footy chat.

Thems the rules here. No f**ty on the GF.

[John102]

[sir roger]

3 hours ago, John102 said:

You get those articles saying who the fastest football players are, then they compare their speed to Usain Bolt, when he broke the world record. 

 

They always compare the footy players top speed against Bolt's average across the entire race, including the standing start and when he is goosed at the end. May be alone on this.

 

As a bit of balance, they are wearing footy boots on grass as well.

[John102]

 

Parenting

[VladimirIlyich]

2 hours ago, John102 said:

 

Parenting

Pics or GTFO.

[Bjornebye]

The way John Torode says yoghurt on masterchef. The irritating twat “yo-gurt” fuck you man 

[Creator Supreme]

26 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

The way John Torode says yoghurt on masterchef. The irritating twat “yo-gurt” fuck you man 

Fun fact: Natural yo-gurt can be used to soothe an irritated twat.

[A Red]

"Home cooked food"

 

No it isn't, you don't cook it at home and bring it in.

[Bruce Spanner]

TV presenters, especially newsreaders, who can not tie a tie.

 

You must have a team in wardrobe, ask for a double fucking Windsor you fucking clowns.

[sir roger]

Was quite pleased at timing a late run to the till in Morrisons and arriving behind only one other person. My smirk soon disappeared when this guy brings out 5 vintage bags for life ( I think Gateway and Victor Value were involved ) , places them all in the packing bit and proceeds to mull over every fucking item he has bought like he was on the Antiques Roadshow  before deciding which bag to propel it into. The bags take up so much room the young cashier has to stop putting stuff through about halfway through his shop and hand items to the bastard one by one. When he has everything loaded he realises he has too many tins in one of the bags and can't lift the fucker, so redistributes them exceedingly slowly to other bags. It then dawns on the arsehole that he is expected to pay and then goes into a duffle bag in his trolley searching for a wallet or cards which he finds after emptying all kinds of shite first. Of course his first card doesn't work but eventually he concludes his business and tootles off without a backward glance at the veins popping out on my forehead, or the old bloke in a blazer behind me who had turned to his wife and said ' Grab my arm, Mary or I swear I am going to punch this cunt ' during the pantomime.

 

 

[VladimirIlyich]

5 hours ago, Creator Supreme said:

Fun fact: Natural yo-gurt can be used to soothe an irritated twat.

It doesn't seem to work on John Torode.

[Champ]

7 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

The way John Torode says yoghurt on masterchef. The irritating twat “yo-gurt” fuck you man 

Serves you right for watching it

[Bjornebye]

Just now, Champ said:

Serves you right for watching it

Absolutely. 

[Champ]

5 hours ago, A Red said:

"Home cooked food"

 

No it isn't, you don't cook it at home and bring it in.

I swerve anywhere that uses that tired expression. You just know it’s going to be reheated pre packed shite