Instant cunt identifiers

[easytoslip]

25 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Nah, worse are the ones who go "Oh I know me too". The same cunts do it about anything.

 

"I got hit by a car this morning" "Me too, fucker sped off as well" 

 

"I woke up getting bummed by the ghost of my nan" "She woke me up with a blow last night, dirty isn't she" 

What a strange thought, that last paragraph. 

[Bjornebye]

1 minute ago, easytoslip said:

What a strange thought, that last paragraph. 

You should have been there mate 

[Mudface]

38 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Nah, worse are the ones who go "Oh I know me too". The same cunts do it about anything.

 

"I got hit by a car this morning" "Me too, fucker sped off as well" 

 

"I woke up getting bummed by the ghost of my nan" "She woke me up with a blow last night, dirty isn't she" 

'Black dog'. As in, 'my black dog is blacker than your black dog'. Every workplace is infested with the cunts.

[Bjornebye]

1 hour ago, Mudface said:

'Black dog'. As in, 'my black dog is blacker than your black dog'. Every workplace is infested with the cunts.

I prefer “elevenerife” 

[Mudface]

1 minute ago, Bjornebye said:

I prefer “elevenerife” 

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Elevenerife

 

Haha.

[Bjornebye]

10 minutes ago, Mudface said:

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Elevenerife

 

Haha.

Haha. Trevors a cunt 

[Elite]

On 09/09/2020 at 23:23, Bjornebye said:

I prefer “elevenerife” 

Those types of people have zero self-awareness, even if you say that they won't get it and go searching for summer breaks to 'Twelverife.'

 

I can't interact with those sorts of people, they are incredibly self-absorbed and pay no attention to anyone's problems/achievements but their own.

[Elite]

2 hours ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Anyone who puts their qualifications in their signature at the bottom of their e mail. Definitive. 

Yeah very annoying.

 

Elite

City And Guilds in Paper Mache Modelling

 

[lifetime fan]

7 minutes ago, Elite said:

Those types of people have zero self-awareness, even if you say that they won't get it and go searching for summer breaks to 'Twelverife.'

 

I can't interact with those sorts of people, they are incredibly self-absorbed and pay no attention to anyone's problems/achievements but their own.

I married one of those cunts. 
 

*shakes head in shame*

[Elite]

11 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Colonel Kurtz

BsC (Hons) in school of fucking life 

The 'School of life' must have terrible offsted reports as everyone I've met that studied there is as thick as fuck.

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

7 minutes ago, Elite said:

The 'School of life' must have terrible offsted reports as everyone I've met that studied there is as thick as fuck.

 

Higher grades than the school of hard knocks though.

[easytoslip]

4 hours ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Anyone who puts their qualifications in their signature at the bottom of their e mail. Definitive. 

What the fuck is a qualification,! Does it entitle you to anything? Yours disgruntled and qualified. 

[Bjornebye]

The only people worse than the cunts who use terms like “the school of life” are those who look down their nose to others, are condescending and speak like they k ow everything and you know fuck all. Often they are too into their own shit that they believe it. They usually have very few real friends and easily take offence when challenged. 

[Elite]

1 hour ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Ha Ha. Well at least it would have taught you that Ofsted is capitalised and has only got 1 f. And its "School of fucking life" . School of life is a different place. Maybe you went to that one. 

Tory cunt.

[easytoslip]

1 hour ago, Bjornebye said:

The only people worse than the cunts who use terms like “the school of life” are those who look down their nose to others, are condescending and speak like they k ow everything and you know fuck all. Often they are too into their own shit that they believe it. They usually have very few real friends and easily take offence when challenged. 

They're sometimes called Sociopaths. 

[AngryOfTuebrook]

On 26/06/2020 at 22:43, Karl_b said:

No such thing as 'road tax' is there? 

Not since 1937.

 

Motorists have been moaning about something that doesn’t exist for 83 years.

[Evelyn Tentions]

I liked the bloodhound in the old Perishers cartoons. B.H. (Calcutta)(failed)

[John102]

Anyone who describes themselves as a petrol head.

[Bjornebye]

9 hours ago, John102 said:

Anyone who describes themselves as a petrol head.

A mate of mine in school who never really came across like a car blert at all got bought a Nissan GTIR something or other by his Dad for his first car. had them silly dump valves and all that 'suped up' crap in it. To be fair the thing was rapid although why someone would want a car like that unless they were actually racing is beyond me. Anyway at 17/18 he never had anything but a fit bird in the passenger seat. I saw him when I was about 20 and he was seeing some bird (think a slightly more skanky Jakki Degg) who frequently got her bristols out in that boy racers magazine from the early 00's (cant remember what it was called). This lad couldn't have pulled in the Grafton under normal circumstances which proves that cars do attract the girls. 

 

I've not spoken with him in years but his facebook profile picture for years was a blue Subaru impreza so you know the kind of cat we are dealing with here. 

 

The fucking meffs. 

[Remmie]

A skanky Degg sounds like a glorious euphemism. 

 

 

[Bjornebye]

5 minutes ago, Remmie said:

A skanky Degg sounds like a glorious euphemism. 

 

 

She was my favourite when I was younger.

 

Degg that is not skanky degg. I bet she's got 8 kids with 6 different juice head drug dealers by now. An eye-shadow of her former-self. Probably goes out with a fella who every weekend has a few lines then kicks off about her getting her chebs out for the world 20 years ago on a car-park on the st-helens link road despite only knowing her for 8 months. 

[Bjornebye]

3 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

A mini novel just there. Are chebs and Bristols the same things ? 

Yes depending on the mood. 

[Remmie]

I'd cheb her, right in the Bristols

[Stouffer]

2 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

A mate of mine in school who never really came across like a car blert at all got bought a Nissan GTIR something or other by his Dad for his first car. had them silly dump valves and all that 'suped up' crap in it. To be fair the thing was rapid although why someone would want a car like that unless they were actually racing is beyond me. Anyway at 17/18 he never had anything but a fit bird in the passenger seat. I saw him when I was about 20 and he was seeing some bird (think a slightly more skanky Jakki Degg) who frequently got her bristols out in that boy racers magazine from the early 00's (cant remember what it was called). This lad couldn't have pulled in the Grafton under normal circumstances which proves that cars do attract the girls. 

 

I've not spoken with him in years but his facebook profile picture for years was a blue Subaru impreza so you know the kind of cat we are dealing with here. 

 

The fucking meffs. 

Subaru bellends; can't stand them.

[General Dryness]

34 minutes ago, Stouffer said:

Subaru bellends; can't stand them.

Same. Subaru is the weapon of choice for the urban boy racer bellend in NZ. Mostly beat up old Imprezas and Legacys.

 

Dribbling spacktards, the lot of 'em.