What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

[Chip Butty]

25 minutes ago, tokyojoe said:

Yesterdays offering cooked by yours truly. Co-op chipolatas, smoked bacon, M&S black pud, fried bread and egg.

 

And please note NO FUCKING BEANS!

 

I'd like to do some acid and look at this breakfast for a while. 

[Mudface]

1 hour ago, Bjornebye said:

Who lives closest to Dave? We might need an intervention 

And an ambulance, judging by the bacon. Actually, this is one thing Ivermectin might be good for.

[Strontium]

1 hour ago, TheHowieLama said:

It looks like a culinary interpretation of an elephant with translucent ears.

 

"Hannibal Crossing the Alps" by Salvador Dali

[Brownie]

And you were all having a go at mine…

[Bob]

4 hours ago, tokyojoe said:

Yesterdays offering cooked by yours truly. Co-op chipolatas, smoked bacon, M&S black pud, fried bread and egg.

 

And please note NO FUCKING BEANS!

“Smoked” is part of the bacon curing process, not an instruction on how to cook it. Jesus that whole plate looks terrible.

[DalyanPete]

20 hours ago, tokyojoe said:

Yesterdays offering cooked by yours truly. Co-op chipolatas, smoked bacon, M&S black pud, fried bread and egg.

 

And please note NO FUCKING BEANS!

Fried bread looks boss but as others have said wtf with the bacon?

I thought the egg was a potato cake.

[DalyanPete]

Love this thread so much.

It's worth putting the breakfasts up just to read the comments.

[DalyanPete]

On 31/01/2022 at 12:36, Mike D said:

 

Bernies Too Station Road Maghull. £6.50 for everything with as many cups of tea you want. Extra sausage instead of beans.

Cooked tomatoes would have been nice and swap the innersoles with bacon.

[Boss]

21 hours ago, tokyojoe said:

Yesterdays offering cooked by yours truly. Co-op chipolatas, smoked bacon, M&S black pud, fried bread and egg.

 

And please note NO FUCKING BEANS!

 

That bacon is the worst food-related thing I've ever seen, and I've seen crime scene photos of Richard Chase blending people's organs into a smoothie. 

[tokyojoe]

At least I've got the guts to post my own creation. I'm amazed most of you lot aren't dead from food poisoning.

[lifetime fan]

Went away for a few days walking in Cornwall last week. 
 

Didn’t get a chance for a full breakfast but we did go to Inkies for a bacon roll. Bloody pricey at a fiver just for a bacon bap but they hand cure and hand slice all their own bacon. It was fucking lovely. 
 

 

[lifetime fan]

9 minutes ago, tokyojoe said:

At least I've got the guts to post my own creation. I'm amazed most of you lot aren't dead from food poisoning.

Have you seen the fucking state of that raw pig?  

[Bjornebye]

16 minutes ago, lifetime fan said:

Went away for a few days walking in Cornwall last week. 
 

Didn’t get a chance for a full breakfast but we did go to Inkies for a bacon roll. Bloody pricey at a fiver just for a bacon bap but they hand cure and hand slice all their own bacon. It was fucking lovely. 
 

 

Thanks for almost getting the thread back on track Col. Looks bloody gorgeous that. 

[Bjornebye]

25 minutes ago, tokyojoe said:

At least I've got the guts to post my own creation. I'm amazed most of you lot aren't dead from food poisoning.

I'm just relieved your still posting mate x 

[Tony Moanero]

53 minutes ago, lifetime fan said:

Went away for a few days walking in Cornwall last week. 
 

Didn’t get a chance for a full breakfast but we did go to Inkies for a bacon roll. Bloody pricey at a fiver just for a bacon bap but they hand cure and hand slice all their own bacon. It was fucking lovely. 
 

 

Looks great, that. I’d have some lettuce and tomato on it. Hot BLT is lovely.

[lifetime fan]

1 minute ago, Tony Moanero said:

Looks great, that. I’d have some lettuce and tomato on it. Hot BLT is lovely.

The bacon was like 3 slices of gammon it was so thick. 
 

As I said pricey, but would defo go again. 

[YorkshireRed]

Breakfast at the kind of hotel in Derby that has a brothel next door.

 

I didn’t fancy bacon. I didn’t actually fancy the breakfast but felt duty bound to get something and post a picture.

 

My waitress had very crooked teeth. I found myself wondering if she also works next door after the breakfast shift has finished.

 

5/10.

 

 

[Bruce Spanner]

4 minutes ago, YorkshireRed said:

Breakfast at the kind of hotel in Derby that has a brothel next door.

 

I didn’t fancy bacon. I didn’t actually fancy the breakfast but felt duty bound to get something and post a picture.

 

My waitress had very crooked teeth. I found myself wondering if she also works next door after the breakfast shift has finished.

 

5/10.

 

 

 

Negged, no excuses.

 

In my world that'd be an outright ban, but these pinko fucking libtards who run the show like 'inclusion' or some other fluffly shite that allows bottom feeders to exist on the interwebs.

[Ezekiel 25:17]

On 31/01/2022 at 19:19, tokyojoe said:

Yesterdays offering cooked by yours truly. Co-op chipolatas, smoked bacon, M&S black pud, fried bread and egg.

 

And please note NO FUCKING BEANS!

Nah this is Blackpool rock isn't it, nice try.

[Karl_b]

20 minutes ago, YorkshireRed said:

Breakfast at the kind of hotel in Derby that has a brothel next door.

 

I didn’t fancy bacon. I didn’t actually fancy the breakfast but felt duty bound to get something and post a picture.

 

My waitress had very crooked teeth. I found myself wondering if she also works next door after the breakfast shift has finished.

 

5/10.

 

 

Absolutely horrendous; you poor bastard. Repped for taking one for the GF.

[Remmie]

I made this and am expecting abuse as is standard but make it, it's "gurtlush"

 

You can't see most of it which is annoying as the best bit is underneath. It's eggy chilli crumpets, topped with a fried egg and a halloumi lattice with a tomato and avocado salad topped with sriracha. Took less than 10 minutes to knock up and is really nice. 

[Tony Moanero]

1 minute ago, Remmie said:

I made this and am expecting abuse as is standard but make it, it's "gurtlush"

 

You can't see most of it which is annoying as the best bit is underneath. It's eggy chilli crumpets, topped with a fried egg and a halloumi lattice with a tomato and avocado salad topped with sriracha. Took less than 10 minutes to knock up and is really nice. 

Cunt plate. The food looks tasty, though.

[Mike D]

Posh twat

[Bjornebye]

On 03/02/2022 at 07:50, YorkshireRed said:

Breakfast at the kind of hotel in Derby that has a brothel next door.

 

I didn’t fancy bacon. I didn’t actually fancy the breakfast but felt duty bound to get something and post a picture.

 

My waitress had very crooked teeth. I found myself wondering if she also works next door after the breakfast shift has finished.

 

5/10.

 

 

You can buy a better breakfast than that out of the Argos catalogue 

25 minutes ago, Remmie said:

I made this and am expecting abuse as is standard but make it, it's "gurtlush"

 

You can't see most of it which is annoying as the best bit is underneath. It's eggy chilli crumpets, topped with a fried egg and a halloumi lattice with a tomato and avocado salad topped with sriracha. Took less than 10 minutes to knock up and is really nice. 

Fuck this 

[Bob]

36 minutes ago, Remmie said:

I made this and am expecting abuse as is standard but make it, it's "gurtlush"

 

You can't see most of it which is annoying as the best bit is underneath. It's eggy chilli crumpets, topped with a fried egg and a halloumi lattice with a tomato and avocado salad topped with sriracha. Took less than 10 minutes to knock up and is really nice. 

Looks boss.