The GF Parenting Thread

[Rico1304]

Izzy goes swimming twice a week at Stockport.  After the session the showers are really busy so we agreed she’d just come to me poolside, collect her bag and get changed when they’d finished.   It’s chaotic so I’m waiting for about 5 mins then thought she’d probably in the changing rooms waiting for her bag. I have to go the long way back through reception to get where she’d be.  Got there and no sign,  went down to the showers, no sign.  Thiught we may have crossed so went back poolside.   No sign.  
 

By this point I’m fucking shitting myself.  I can honestly say I’ve never been more scared in my life.  I’m shouting her, parents are looking but no knowing what to do.  I go to the office and a women goes through to the loos and finds her in the shower cubicle.  
 

I then go from furious to overjoyed to furious to overjoyed and can feel the adrenaline.  Without a doubt the scariest 10 mins of my life.  

[YorkshireRed]

10 hours ago, Rico1304 said:

Izzy goes swimming twice a week at Stockport.  After the session the showers are really busy so we agreed she’d just come to me poolside, collect her bag and get changed when they’d finished.   It’s chaotic so I’m waiting for about 5 mins then thought she’d probably in the changing rooms waiting for her bag. I have to go the long way back through reception to get where she’d be.  Got there and no sign,  went down to the showers, no sign.  Thiught we may have crossed so went back poolside.   No sign.  
 

By this point I’m fucking shitting myself.  I can honestly say I’ve never been more scared in my life.  I’m shouting her, parents are looking but no knowing what to do.  I go to the office and a women goes through to the loos and finds her in the shower cubicle.  
 

I then go from furious to overjoyed to furious to overjoyed and can feel the adrenaline.  Without a doubt the scariest 10 mins of my life.  

Been there mate. Mine are older now but my eldest disappeared in a crowded shopping centre when he was about five. I thought he was with the wife, she thought he was with me. 
 

He was probably only gone a little over five minutes, but the feelings of panic were unlike anything I’d had before or since. We found him looking in a shop window, I don’t think he even knew he was lost.

 

I now worry about him getting home safely from a night out in town. He’s only just gone eighteen, so has only been a few times. No way I’m sleeping until I hear him come in though.

 

Bloody kids. 

[Bob]

7 minutes ago, YorkshireRed said:

Been there mate. Mine are older now but my eldest disappeared in a crowded shopping centre when he was about five. I thought he was with the wife, she thought he was with me. 
 

He was probably only gone a little over five minutes, but the feelings of panic were unlike anything I’d had before or since. We found him looking in a shop window, I don’t think he even knew he was lost.

 

I now worry about him getting home safely from a night out in town. He’s only just gone eighteen, so has only been a few times. No way I’m sleeping until I hear him come in though.

 

Bloody kids. 

On that theme, I was our for a works meal this week and one chap was saying how his wife has a tracking app on his lads phone and she uses it to check that he got home safely each night, but he’s at uni.

 

reminded me of that episode of black mirror - angel eye I think.

 

you’re gonna drive yourself absolutely nuts doing that, surely?

[Captain Turdseye]

3 hours ago, Bob Spunkmouse said:

On that theme, I was our for a works meal this week and one chap was saying how his wife has a tracking app on his lads phone and she uses it to check that he got home safely each night, but he’s at uni.

 

reminded me of that episode of black mirror - angel eye I think.

 

you’re gonna drive yourself absolutely nuts doing that, surely?

 

Spooky. We had a lot of grief with MiddleTurd a couple of weeks ago, caused mainly by shit she’s been up to on her phone. 

The long and short of it is, she’s now resolved to spend much more time with the rest of the family and one of the first things I chose to start watching of an evening with her is Black Mirror. Not got around to watching that one yet though. I jumped straight to Nosedive as a “see how crap social media really is” kind of thing and I’m just picking at random most nights because I’ve only seen them all once myself. 
 

I know she can track her brother. I don’t know why he’s allowed that to happen. Haven’t asked. 

[Bob]

11 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

 

Spooky. We had a lot of grief with MiddleTurd a couple of weeks ago, caused mainly by shit she’s been up to on her phone. 

The long and short of it is, she’s now resolved to spend much more time with the rest of the family and one of the first things I chose to start watching of an evening with her is Black Mirror. Not got around to watching that one yet though. I jumped straight to Nosedive as a kind of “see how crap social media really is” kind of thing and I’m just picking at random most nights because I’ve only seen them all once myself. 
 

I know she can track her brother. I don’t know why he’s allowed that to happen. Haven’t asked. 

It’s not an easy watch from memory. It’s very good, but uncomfortable. It stuck with me for a long time.

[YorkshireRed]

My eldest has my old phone. As a result I can track him. 
 

Found myself doing it a couple of times when he’s been out at night. A practice that can only lead to bad things. 

[Captain Willard]

12 hours ago, YorkshireRed said:

Been there mate. Mine are older now but my eldest disappeared in a crowded shopping centre when he was about five. I thought he was with the wife, she thought he was with me. 
 

He was probably only gone a little over five minutes, but the feelings of panic were unlike anything I’d had before or since. We found him looking in a shop window, I don’t think he even knew he was lost.

 

I now worry about him getting home safely from a night out in town. He’s only just gone eighteen, so has only been a few times. No way I’m sleeping until I hear him come in though.

 

Bloody kids. 

Mrs Willard dropped our 12 year old at football at 7 tonight , drove home and rang me in Germany only for me to tell her training was cancelled. The trouble is the other dads fill the What app thread with blokey banter so you have to scroll through pages and pages of shit to get any actual information. She drove back to the now deserted and dark playing fields but no sign. He had got a lift back from another mum. All of this unfolding whilst I am stuck in Germany and getting texts from her every 5 mins. Very stressful half hour. 

[Captain Turdseye]

Struggling to get some ideas out of Turdsette for her ‘main’ Xmas present, so I’ve just added a couple of bits to her list. 
 

 

[Champ]

1 hour ago, Captain Turdseye said:

Struggling to get some ideas out of Turdsette for her ‘main’ Xmas present, so I’ve just added a couple of bits to her list. 
 

 

She’s much nicer than you

[Captain Turdseye]

11 minutes ago, Champ said:

She’s much nicer than you

I’ll have you know the Spirograph and Linkee board game were my ideas as well. 

[Karl_b]

We have a 14 month old that has never slept through, that relies on a bottle to get to sleep and wakes 4/5 times a night. Someone remind me why we did this.

[Ezekiel 25:17]

24 minutes ago, Karl_b said:

We have a 14 month old that has never slept through, that relies on a bottle to get to sleep and wakes 4/5 times a night. Someone remind me why we did this.

You just need an older kid, mines 17 and he always sleeps through.

[Karl_b]

1 minute ago, Ezekiel 25:17 said:

You just need an older kid, mines 17 and he always sleeps through.

Swap?

[Paulie Dangerously]

25 minutes ago, Karl_b said:

We have a 14 month old that has never slept through, that relies on a bottle to get to sleep and wakes 4/5 times a night. Someone remind me why we did this.

 

Pity rep. 

 

Won't give advice because it's worthless. 

[Karl_b]

Also, your lad is now 17?! Fuck, we're all old.

[Bob]

On 29/11/2022 at 15:09, Captain Turdseye said:

I’ll have you know the Spirograph and Linkee board game were my ideas as well. 

I knocked Linkee off you as a present for grandma as we often play board games on a Wednesday when I collect her from there as they take her swimming after school.

 

bloody hard isn’t it?

 

I like it a lot, but it’s very much me can my dad with my girl a minor contributor to grandads team.

[Captain Turdseye]

11 minutes ago, Bob Spunkmouse said:

I knocked Linkee off you as a present for grandma as we often play board games on a Wednesday when I collect her from there as they take her swimming after school.

 

bloody hard isn’t it?

 

I like it a lot, but it’s very much me can my dad with my girl a minor contributor to grandads team.

We played it over Xmas. Turdsette ended up being the quizmaster and me and my boy almost came to blows because I decided to remove one of his letters, instead of taking one from the in-laws who were about to win. 
 

I just wanted to cement second place. 

[Champ]

10 hours ago, Karl_b said:

We have a 14 month old that has never slept through, that relies on a bottle to get to sleep and wakes 4/5 times a night. Someone remind me why we did this.

 A boy?

[Karl_b]

17 minutes ago, Champ said:

 A boy?

Girl.

[Champ]

29 minutes ago, Karl_b said:

Girl.

Ha! Then I have no advice for you. I was going to tell you that boys are rubbish!

 

Seriously, unless there are health issues it’s time for the tough love

[JohnnyH]

11 hours ago, Karl_b said:

We have a 14 month old that has never slept through, that relies on a bottle to get to sleep and wakes 4/5 times a night. Someone remind me why we did this.

I have a 4 and a 5 year old who don't sleep through.  The 4 year old wakes at 22:30 every night and insists on coming into bed with us (my wife is usually in bed by then) and if you say no, he goes off on one and fully wakes up so we don't argue as at least he just climbs in and goes to sleep.  His older brother then usually follows at around 02:30.  Then which ever is quick enough between my wife and me to get out and get to the spare room gets a bit of sleep.  The other suffers with boots to the back and head for the rest of the night.

 

Basically what I'm saying is you've years of this to go.

[Bob]

42 minutes ago, JohnnyH said:

I have a 4 and a 5 year old who don't sleep through.  The 4 year old wakes at 22:30 every night and insists on coming into bed with us (my wife is usually in bed by then) and if you say no, he goes off on one and fully wakes up so we don't argue as at least he just climbs in and goes to sleep.  His older brother then usually follows at around 02:30.  Then which ever is quick enough between my wife and me to get out and get to the spare room gets a bit of sleep.  The other suffers with boots to the back and head for the rest of the night.

 

Basically what I'm saying is you've years of this to go.

As the saying goes, you’ve made your own bed there. 
 

say no. Accept the kick off. Accept misery and pain for a few weeks or whatever. It will pass. You’re setting an expectation that this behaviour is ok and even more than that, it’s normal. 
 

knock it on the head or you’ll have this for years ahead.

[JohnnyH]

7 minutes ago, Bob Spunkmouse said:

As the saying goes, you’ve made your own bed there. 
 

say no. Accept the kick off. Accept misery and pain for a few weeks or whatever. It will pass. You’re setting an expectation that this behaviour is ok and even more than that, it’s normal. 
 

knock it on the head or you’ll have this for years ahead.

No.  I won't be doing that.

[Bob]

21 minutes ago, JohnnyH said:

No.  I won't be doing that.

Fair enough. 
 

Seems like an odd decision from where I’m sitting choosing the option that is “maybe sometimes get a nights sleep if I win the middle of the night run to the spare room” 

[Mook]

Bob is correct, that nonsense should have been knocked on the head immediately.

 

@Karl_b The only advice I can give is to get the bairn into a routine. Our youngest was awful for nine months until we found the perfect routine & he was never much bother after that. Obviously everybody is different.