Wayne and Coleeeeen

[Chuck Fadanoid]

GMTV have got wedding day updates every fucking 8 seconds. The world truly is fucked.

[sparta7]

Could we have another option entitled "Do You Give A Flying Fuck?"

[melons]

ha, i only knew about this because of the news this morning, i mean THE NEWS FFS, how is this news worthy??

 

anyway, i give it about 5 years, he's got away with far too much already, she's a walk over where he's concerned, *well in my opinion.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(*that to them is worth fuck all)

[Guest PaddyBerger15]

So Coleen, what was it that first attracted you to the thick, ugly, Baboon faced, multi, multi Millionaire Wayne Rooney then?

[Chuck Fadanoid]

Could we have another option entitled "Do You Give A Flying Fuck?"

 

That's a given.

[reder]

Who gives a shit, really. They will probably be together until Wayne quits football and the cash stops rolling in.

 

The coverage of this story completely ruined my morning viewing of Priya Kaur-Jones, the hottest babe on GMTV for many a year.

 

Mandatory photo supplied below to conform with GF rules :

 

Priya Kaur-Jones

[Section_31]

Pair of classless twats, he spits on the floor indoors and she looks like she's permanently sniffing a fart.

[dudek#1]

Typical GMTV. Aimed at housewife bints who spend all day eating tuna mayonnaise jacket potatoes and belieiving them to be healthy, drive a Mégane Scenics at 5mph with baby on board stickers everywhere and spend their husbands' dosh on shit. These sorts lap up shit like Rooney's wedding. That's the target audience of GMTV.

[RJ Fan club]

I think they're an inspiration to a generation of youngsters. Wayne a charming and delightful young man who respects his elders, whilst Coleen is an Asda keeping it real style guru akin to being the British Sarah Jessica Parker.

 

I for one can't wait to see the wedding photo splashed all over some cheap tasteless magazine cover.

 

Like decomposing plastic bags, they will last years.

[Thants]

I thought they were married. I don't do gossip very well. If I bought a magazine it would be 'Mild!'

[Chuck Fadanoid]

Typical GMTV. Aimed at housewife bints who spend all day eating tuna mayonnaise jacket potatoes and belieiving them to be healthy, drive a Mégane Scenics at 5mph with baby on board stickers everywhere and spend their husbands' dosh on shit. These sorts lap up shit like Rooney's wedding. That's the target audience of GMTV.

 

Well put. I should probably add that I only saw GMTV this morning while I was making my cereal, as it was on in the kitchen. I of course was in the other room watching Euronews, the only acceptable news channel.

[Bourbon]

Spoon-feeding society useless shite as ever. Media diversion and we buy it in spades.

 

As for the other two Jeremy Kyle contestants, I always thought it was a "convenience" relationship; Wayne bangs anything that'll let him and she has long been seeing a local fella her age.

 

Within a year and she'll get £mills*

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*See what I did there?

[Section_31]

Greta Garbo, and Monroe

Dietrich and DiMaggio

Marlon Brando, Jimmy Dean

On the cover of a magazine

 

Grace Kelly; Harlow, Jean

Picture of a beauty queen

Gene Kelly, Fred Astaire

Ginger Rogers, dance on air

 

They had style, they had grace

Rita Hayworth gave good face

Lauren, Katherine, Lana too

Bette Davis, we love you

 

 

Anyone remember when peoeple were famous for being good at things and not just because they were married to someone?

I can imagine Frank Sinatra getting barred from a Croxteth pub for spitting on the floor too.

[melons]

Typical GMTV. Aimed at housewife bints who spend all day eating tuna mayonnaise jacket potatoes and belieiving them to be healthy, drive a Mégane Scenics at 5mph with baby on board stickers everywhere and spend their husbands' dosh on shit. These sorts lap up shit like Rooney's wedding. That's the target audience of GMTV.

 

Good grief, i so don't fit a stereo type... Ive never had a baby on board sticker, erm, what purpose do they serve?

 

 

Within a year and she'll get £mills

 

She deserves every penny if she has to have sex with him.....

[aws]

Good grief, i so don't fit a stereo type... Ive never had a baby on board sticker, erm, what purpose do they serve.

 

Save kidnappers loads of time when they're lining up targets.

[melons]

Save kidnappers loads of time when they're lining up targets.

 

 

*disappears to buy enough child on board thingies to cover back windscreen*

[Plewggs]

The forum is in a very uncharitable mood this morning regarding the nations best-loved couple. No wonder none of you were invited to the wedding.

 

I have no doubt our star-crossed lovers will live happily ever after, and have lots of beautiful sprogs. Personally I can’t wait for the first-born to arrive if only to learn what they’ll name it. To my musically attuned ears Plewggs Rooney sounds ace.

 

If you were Wayne or Colleen what would you call your first born? Bear in mind you are celebs, so summat commonplace and routine is out of the question.

 

As a source of inspiration, here are some actual names of kids born to celebrity couples. It’s a tough act to follow, try not to laugh.

 

 

Aanisah: Macy Gray (also mother to Tahmel)

 

Apple: Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow

 

Astrella Celeste: Donovan and Linda Lawrence (also parents to Oriole Nebula)

 

Atherton Grace: Don Johnson and Kelley Phleger

 

Audio Science: Shannyn Sossamon

 

Aurelius Cy: Elle Macpherson and Arpad Busson

 

Blue Angel: U2's The Edge and Aislinn O'Sullivan

 

Bluebell Madonna: Geri Halliwell

 

Brooklyn: David and Victoria Beckham (also parents to Romeo and Cruz)

 

Calico: Alice and Sheryl Cooper (also parents to Sonora Rose)

 

Camera: Arthur Ashe and Jeanne Moutoussamy

 

Destry: Steven Spielberg and Kate Capshaw

 

Diezel Ky: Toni Braxton and Keri Lewis (also parents to Denim Cole)

 

Fifi Trixibell: Bob Geldof and Paula Yates (also parents to Peaches and Pixie)

 

Fuchsia: Sting and Frances Tomelty

 

Gaia: Emma Thompson and Greg Wise

 

Gulliver: Gary Oldman and Donya Fiorentino

 

Heaven: Lil' Mo (also mother to God'Iss Love Stone)

 

Heavenly Hiraani Tiger Lily: Paula Yates and Michael Hutchence

 

Hopper: Sean Penn and Robin Wright

 

Ireland: Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger

 

Jaz: Steffi Graf and Andre Agassi

 

Jazz Domino: Joe Strummer

 

Jermajesty: Jermaine Jackson and Alejandra Genevieve Oaziaza (previously married to Jermaine's brother Randy)

 

Kal-El Coppola: Nicholas Cage (Kal-El is Superman’s original birth name)

 

Kyd: David Duchovny and Tea Leoni

 

Lark Song: Mia Farrow and André Previn

 

Lennon: Liam Gallagher and Patsy Kensit

 

Liberty: Ryan Giggs

 

London Emilio: Slash

 

Luna Coco Patricia: Frank Lampard and Elen Rive

 

Marquise: 50 Cent

 

Memphis Eve: Bono

 

Moon Unit: Frank Zappa, also father to Dweezil and Diva Muffin

 

Moxie CrimeFighter: Penn Jillette (also father to Zolten)

 

Ocean: Forest Whitaker (also father to Sonnet and True)

 

Pilot Inspektor: Jason Lee and Beth Riesgraf

 

Poppy Honey: Jamie and Jules Oliver (also parents to Daisy Boo)

 

Rocket: Robert Rodriguez (also father to Racer, Rebel and Rogue)

 

Rufus Tiger: Roger Taylor also father to Tiger Lily and Lola Daisy

 

Saffron Sahara: Simon and Yasmin Le Bon (also parents to Amber Rose and Tallulah Pine)

 

Sage Moonblood: Sylvester Stallone and Sasha Czack (also parents to Seargeoh)

 

Satchel: Spike Lee and Tonya Lewis Lee

 

Seven Sirius: Andre Benjamin and Erykah Badu

 

Shiloh Nouvel: Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie

 

Sosie: Kevin Bacon and Kyra Sedgwick

 

Suri: Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes

 

Tallulah: Bruce Willis and Demi Moore (also parents to Scout and Rumer)

 

Willow Camille Reign: Will Smith and Jada Pinkett-Smith

 

Zola Ivy: Eddie Murphy and Nicole Mitchell

[RJ Fan club]

Like Romeo and Juliet, Cleopatra and Mark Antony, Scarlett O’Hara and Rhett Butler, Orpheus and Eurydike; I think this will prove to be one of the all time great enduring love storys.

 

I just hope Fag Ash Lil doesn't make it a love triangle like, Arthur, Lancelot and Guinevere.

[melons]

If evidence was ever needed not to get high before naming your child, Plewggs has just given it.

[Section_31]

If evidence was ever needed not to get high before naming your child, Plewggs has just given it.

 

I'm going to call my kids Apollo and Boomer.

[Bourbon]

Rash and Imminent Charters. Going for twins.

 

Already booked in for a Tuesday birth.

[Tom R]

I don't know what that disgusting fucking skanky slag sees in that fuck ugly multi-millionaire cuntpig.

[Section_31]

I don't know what that disgusting fucking skanky slag sees in that fuck ugly multi-millionaire cuntpig.

 

I'm reliably informed by people on these boards that young Coleen was often heard to say "Eeeeeeeeee e makez me syick" before he signed professional forms at the bitters.

And that young wazza did infact have another Mrs who worked at the local supermarket but is now - forever forgotten.

[Stu Monty]

Just heard on Newsbeat on Radio 1

 

"I'm Tits McGee, and I'm over in Italy where Wayne and Coleen have just tied the knot, more Wayne and Coleen news coming up"

 

There is no more. That's it. They got married, and that's not even real news.

[melons]

I'm going to call my kids Apollo and Boomer.

 

If you can get reported to child services for neglect or what ever, by letting your 9 year old walk home from school alone, then , fuck, surely a name would warrant child abuse too?