Yer ma, / Da jokes

[Scott_M]

You didn't let me down.

[Tony Moanero]

You didn't let me down.

Lighten up, mate.

 

I very much doubt anyone on here makes 'Yer Ma' jokes away from the Internet. I, for one, certainly don't. I do, however, enjoy posting jokes that are intentionally shit and repetitive, on here, as shit jokes amuse me.

 

'Yer Ma' jokes are not a Liverpool thing at all. Kids all over the country make them, as do kids in America, and probably the rest of the world.

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

Your ma is so fat, that I'm genuinely ashamed that I arse fucked her 127 times.

[Oh Buoy]

Scott M's ma tells ya ma jokes and isn't from Liverpool. 

[Fugitive]

Scott M's Ma wears Lonsdale knickers

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Yer Ma watches Teletext and thinks it's Internet.

[Harry Squatter]

Yer mar is so fat that all her holiday photos are aerial shots.

[setreal]

'Yer Ma' jokes are not a Liverpool thing at all. Kids all over the country make them, as do kids in America, and probably the rest of the world.

 

Deine Mudder.

 

[JohnnyH]

Yer Ma's lovely.

 

 

 

Always space for niceties.

[Scott_M]

Lighten up, mate.

 

I very much doubt anyone on here makes 'Yer Ma' jokes away from the Internet. I, for one, certainly don't. I do, however, enjoy posting jokes that are intentionally shit and repetitive, on here, as shit jokes amuse me.

 

'Yer Ma' jokes are not a Liverpool thing at all. Kids all over the country make them, as do kids in America, and probably the rest of the world.

 

 

It's mainly based on a lad at work who uses them & each time he says it, it's met with a collective roll of the eyes from the rest of the team.

[Alan Sex]

Yer ma's s fat that when she sits on my face I mffff mfff mffffffff.

[Fowlers God]

Ya Da'

[Strontium]

Yer ma's got a Jewson's card

[Dr Nowt]

Yer ma goes to KFC to lick other people's fingers

[ZonkoVille77]

Yer ma makes lightsabre sounds during sex

[Bjornebye]

Yer ma types right click into the search engine

[AngryOfTuebrook]

As ever, Trumo wins.

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

Yer ma is bigger than the club

[manwiththestick]

Ya ma makes you Vesta Chow Mein for Sunday dinner.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

Yer ma is bigger than the club

Yer da's never heard of the cunt.

[Alan Sex]

Yer ma's a single mother cos yer da fucked off when he found out she was pregnant, and never paid a penny in child support. Not that you would know as you've never met him and spend all your time visiting your crack whore ma in hospital where she's dying from shithouse AIDS she got from a bad needle her pimp gave her.

[Bjornebye]

Yer Da wins the womens 1500 metres 

[General Dryness]

Yer das a racewalker.

[Ginny]

YE ma's a slag

[AngryOfTuebrook]

http://www.clickhole.com/blogpost/i-put-fat-suit-understand-what-its-be-your-mom-2061

 

 Put On A Fat Suit To Understand What It’s Like To Be Your Mom

Margaret Simms

Blogger

As a thin, conventionally attractive woman, there’s no denying that society affords me privileges that aren’t extended to everyone. I’ve always been aware of this to some extent, but I’ve never truly grasped just how difficult life can be for people who don’t have the looks or body type our culture idealizes. That’s why I recently decided to spend a day in a fat suit in order to understand what it’s like to be your mom.

 

You may think that this sounds like a gimmick, but please know that I embarked on this experiment only hoping for greater insight and empathy. I wanted to feel the way your mom feels when she steps on a scale and it says “To be continued.” I wanted to experience the same embarrassment she experiences when measuring her waistline with an odometer, or having to rent a U-Haul in order to get carryout. In wearing the fat suit, I was wearing the stigma that burdens your mom every single day. And I quickly learned that it wasn’t easy.

 

From the moment I put on the fat suit, it became clear that your mom’s life was way more challenging than I ever could’ve imagined. You can’t sit down without first checking for innocent bystanders. You can’t roll over in bed without getting your passport stamped. You can’t even take a selfie without using Google Maps. Little mundane tasks and actions suddenly become tremendous ordeals, and yet, for your mom, that’s just reality.

 

Things got even harder once I left the house. Walking a mile in your mom’s shoes means so much more than destroying millions of dollars worth of asphalt and infrastructure. It means having poachers constantly trying to kill you for your tusks. It means walking into a restaurant and seeing a sign that says “MAXIMUM OCCUPANCY: 100 PEOPLE OR YOUR MOM.” It means leaving your home in a raincoat and having everyone shout “Taxi!”

 

After just a few minutes outside, I desperately wanted to take the fat suit off and return to my normal life. It was crushing to think that your mom doesn’t have this option, that 24/7, 365, she has no choice but to get by in a world where hot dog carts are constantly following her like baby ducks. While I could happily go back to my life of thin privilege, she would have to continue going to SeaWorld to take baths and continue having small objects orbit around her wherever she goes. And that’s not fair.

 

After all, who cares that she has to iron her pants on the driveway? Who cares that her blood type is nougat? Who cares that she orders her Ubers honey-glazed? She’s a human being just like everyone else, regardless of the fact that if you search her name on Wikipedia you get redirected to “Neptune.”

 

To feel what your mom goes through and to experience the cruel judgment of strangers and livestock appraisers that she faces every single day was incredibly eye-opening. It left as huge of an impression on me as your mom leaves on the Richter scale, and it made me realize that everybody—skinny people and land-dwelling super-mammals alike—is equally deserving of happiness and respect. Period.