Works Christmas Nights out

[grazywalker]

Got two this year

One next Friday in Leeds . I only took over that office in November so it is all a bit new . May have to be a bit careful , probably won't be but should be .I have the kitty so I hope to fuck thme all off at about 8.00pm

18th in Manchester .Now that could get messy indeed. There are about 100 going to that one so I should be able to hide in a dark corner until the cheesy 80's music comes out then I am proper fucked .

[Fugitive]

I've got to go to a 21st Party for some bird tonight. Rumours are that the place will be rammed full of ladies aged 21 and under.

 

I really dont want to go but I feel I have to at least show my face for a few hours out of respect.

 

*smirks*

 

Fanny ahoy.

[Skidfingers McGonical]

I concur, as I was there also. It was the most cringeworthy moment in the history of christmas parties.

 

Skidders, you did have the chance to get off at 5pm back into town where I ended up in the croc (probably listening to Paulie Dangerously slaughter Baby Got Back) till the wee hours of the morning.

 

Oh and to add to last night, there was only funny moment of the evening. There was a raffle, yes it was that shite, and if you won you got a bottle of wine and put into a national draw for a holiday to Kuala Lumpar next year. One of the lads had his name drawn out and I swear I thought he was going to start crying and I'm thinking "fucking hell, it's only wine." He thought he'd won the holiday. The best part of the night was watching him slowly realise he'd won a bottle of pomagne.

 

Ha ha that was boss that moment.

 

I got home for about 6, went to Tesco got a bottle of red preparing myself for a visit to the croc later on. But I passed out and fell asleep till half ten.

[Furmedge]

Ha ha that was boss that moment.

 

I got home for about 6, went to Tesco got a bottle of red preparing myself for a visit to the croc later on. But I passed out and fell asleep till half ten.

 

Hardcore

[Faustus]

People talking about a Christmas night out with their work almost makes me wish I had a job.

[Anny Road]

I'm the boss at our place and I usually get more pissed than any of the miserable bastards. Usually ends with me getting chinned by the wife for groping the cleaner during robbie singing angels in some hell hole.

[odris]

I'm the boss at our place and I usually get more pissed than any of the miserable bastards. Usually ends with me getting chinned by the wife for groping the cleaner during robbie singing angels in some hell hole.

 

Any jobs going? You sound like a cool boss.

[Anny Road]

Any jobs going? You sound like a cool boss.

You dancin

[odris]

Errr yes? Was that the right answer? Did i get the job?

[Anny Road]

I will need a full CV including any embarrassing incidents and whether or not you take beans on a fry up.

[odris]

Anthony O'Driscoll

 

Age: 19 and a half

 

Previous Experience: None

 

Embarrassing Incidents: Not many....yet

 

Beans: No thanks

[Anny Road]

Anthony O'Driscoll

 

Age: 19 and a half

 

Previous Experience: None

 

Embarrassing Incidents: Not many....yet

 

Beans: No thanks

 

 

FAIL.

 

The job has gone to a Muslim single parent IVF gay amputee.

 

 

Edit, Who served in Afghanistan

[odris]

Did i not mention i descend from a long line of Mexicans? Think about that you racist motherfucker!

[Anny Road]

Did you say mexican

[manwiththestick]

Our's is on the 19th but i'm not going because they're all knobs. Last one i went to was in 2006 and i only went then to try and get a grip with the office hottie of which i was successful but it was somewhat dampened by the fact that she could hardly talk and smelt of sick.

[Anny Road]

The best story I have about christmas nights out is maybe a story about how liverpool has cahnged in a few years.

 

I was traveling around the states and spend a long month or so in the florida keys, fishing, drinking. Anyway Margarita was the drink of choice.

 

Came back to Liverpool to meet up with my old colleagues and the christmas night out was in a mexican place. I order a Margarita. Whats that? I was asked. Fuck off.

[TheBitch]

I was traveling around the states and spend a long month or so in the florida keys, fishing, drinking. Anyway Margarita was the drink of choice.

 

Came back to Liverpool to meet up with my old colleagues and the christmas night out was in a mexican place. I order a Margarita. Whats that? I was asked. Fuck off.

 

 

Pffft. Fucking douchebags, everyone knows its cheese and tomato.

[grazywalker]

Our's is on the 19th but i'm not going because they're all knobs. Last one i went to was in 2006 and i only went then to try and get a grip with the office hottie of which i was successful but it was somewhat dampened by the fact that she could hardly talk and smelt of sick.

 

I remember my mate throwing up in a club under the table out of radar of course and witihn 5 minutes he was throwing his tongue in some girls mouth. His breath stank before he was sick so god knows what she was tasting .

[Top of the Kop]

It's gonna be a massive pub crawl, then onto the Ocean Rooms for dancing. Possible lap dancing or casino afterwards. Finally as we know eating is cheating; the food will come at the end of the evening in the all night greasy spoon. A Market diner gutbuster at 4 am. Lovely! Back into work for 8.

 

It's supposed to have an Anchorman theme too. But everyone is moaning it's too late to sort it. Boring twats.

 

if you are heading to Ocean rooms then surely you will be going to the Market Diner afterwards?

[RJ Fan club]

if you are heading to Ocean rooms then surely you will be going to the Market Diner afterwards?

 

Yeah, and it was in my post!

 

Market Diner fucking rules. Except for that burger they seem to hide beneath the mountain of food. You can do without that shit.

[Section_31]

Did you say mexican

 

superb

[lifetime fan]

I tend to give them a swerve now and organise my own piss up with only a select few chosen to join me. There are far too many wankers with big mouths where I work now.

 

The first and last Christmas do I went do was shortly after I first started working here.

 

It was a 70's themed night in a half decent hotel so there I am dressed as Rod Stewart with the flairs, shirt unbuttoned half way down my chest and a red crush velvet jacket, how could any woman refuse my advances?

 

I get absolutely cunted, tell the director everyone thinks he's a prick, grope the assistant director in front of her husband and tell her im going commando and force her hand down my trousers to prove it to her, tell an old sort who was 47 (I was 19) if she gave me a blow job id do the elephant across the dance floor, which she did and so did I and was apparently ordering loads of bottles of champange on someone elses tab.

 

My mate still takes the piss today and tells me the bouncers wouldn't stop apologising before they through me out as I had provided so much entertainment for them all night.

[sparta7]

Just go round the pubs with a couple of the good lads and girls from our place, nothing too structured.

 

I wont go on the official works do because the bosses and quite a few of my "coworkers" are people I spend as little time as possible with. And no amount of free ale and vol au vents is going to change that.

[dirty_sanchez]

Mine is on friday. It's going to be shit. Not only did I get married in this, the first year we've had fit single girls in the office, but also I lost a bet to my boss and now have to drive him and his wife home. Also, my own wife is not able to attend, so I will probably be the only sober person watching all of my work colleagues getting smashed. Oh and in addition to this, the company has contributed exactly nothing financially to the night so everyone has to pay for their own food and drink. I'm probably going to jib it off early and go and get pissed in town.

 

There's not even any fucking karaoke.

[Top of the Kop]

Had mine on Friday. I got extremely drunk, tried to shag every female member of staff, picked a fight with a rat faced barman and now the boss wants to see me in her office. This could get messy.