Odd things you do that you wonder if anyone else does

[littletedwest]

I sing to my dog and change the lyrics.

So instead of "I'm just mad about saffron, saffrons mad about me, they call me mellow yellow" as I heard that earlier.

It became "I'm just mad about tilly, tillys mad me, they call her big and brown dog"

[Stouffer]

I sing to my dog and change the lyrics.

So instead of "I'm just mad about saffron, saffrons mad about me, they call me mellow yellow" as I heard that earlier.

It became "I'm just mad about tilly, tillys mad me, they call her big and brown dog"

Quite rightly.

[Rico1304]

When I get in a lift and the the voice says "Going down" I always add "Mr Tyler". Makes it awkward if there's other people in the lift but I can't stop myself.

[Total Longo]

I sing to my dog and change the lyrics.

So instead of "I'm just mad about saffron, saffrons mad about me, they call me mellow yellow" as I heard that earlier.

It became "I'm just mad about tilly, tillys mad me, they call her big and brown dog"

 

My Mrs constantly talks to the dog in a stupid baby voice, it drives me nuts. Even odder that she never did it when the kids were little.  

[lifetime fan]

When I make my breakfast in the morning I use two knives, one for the butter and one for the marmite in case I want more toast after I've had the first 2.

[Redder Lurtz]

When staying in hotels I steal a solitary teaspoon from the tea making stuff. I've got dozens of teaspoons. You can never have too many, always got one to hand when I need one.

[Elite]

In bed at night when it's dark, I'll sometimes grab my phone, select brightness and put it on the highest setting to completely startle myself.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

On 30/03/2017 at 09:42, Total Longo said:

I do my own commentary when watching the match on FM16. 

For added realism you should come on here to post about what a cunt the commentator is.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

When I'm reading a book, after each reading session I figure out what percentage of the way through it I am.

[KMD7]

2 minutes ago, AngryOfTuebrook said:

When I'm reading a book, after each reading session I figure out what percentage of the way through it I am.

Ha I do that too.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

7 minutes ago, KMD7 said:

Ha I do that too.

 

 

[Geoff Woade]

I’m at an age that I see or hear when most of my exes are getting married or having kids. The overriding thought I get in my head is that they wish it had been with me rather than whomever they’re with. 

[rb14]

In the swimming pool, or indeed the sea, I'm always on tippy toes when I'm at least waist deep. And I'm always asking myself why I'm doing it and I never know. I might put my feet flat on the bottom to show myself I can, but find myself back on tippy toes again within ten seconds. What's all that about? 

[rb14]

And teaspoons. Don't get me started. I make a cup of tea, and then rinse the teaspoon slightly and put it just hanging off the drainer so the spoon bit dries. I can keep a teaspoon going for days like that. It gets layers of tannin on it (why?) and still I'll dutifully rinse it and hang it off the drainer. The dishwasher cleans it up no problem. We have no shortage of teaspoons. 

 

Mr rb14 does a cup of tea and doesn't rinse it and puts it completely on the drainer, tea-covered spoon right way up, creating a gecky tea mess. I could swing for him. 

[YorkshireRed]

I talk to inanimate objects, probably more than I do real people. I enjoy a morning coffee and a gossip with the coffee table, or making lunch whilst checking in with the chopping board. 

[YorkshireRed]

8 hours ago, Geoff Woade said:

I’m at an age that I see or hear when most of my exes are getting married or having kids. The overriding thought I get in my head is that they wish it had been with me rather than whomever they’re with. 

Obviously. 

[M_B]

When I approach any sliding door, I wave my hand as if I'm a jedi opening it with the force. I don't even think about it anymore - it's become compulsive.

[VladimirIlyich]

I used to wank in the middle aisle of the local supermarket.

 

Yours.

HMP Walton.

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

I leave my meat till last when eating anything with meat obviously. 
 

[manwiththestick]

9 minutes ago, VERBAL DIARRHEA said:

I leave my meat till last when eating anything with meat obviously. 
 

Doesn't everyone do that?

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

6 minutes ago, manwiththestick said:

Doesn't everyone do that?

Do they? I know loads who don’t?

[sir roger]

I don't , I have a friend who eats everything on the plate one by one and it sends me around the bend.

[Captain Turdseye]

2 hours ago, VERBAL DIARRHEA said:

I leave my meat till last when eating anything with meat obviously. 
 

 

2 hours ago, manwiththestick said:

Doesn't everyone do that?

I will always leave at least some of the meat (or whatever is the ‘best’ thing on the plate) until last, making absolutely sure that the final mouthful is the nicest stuff on the plate. Sometimes that might not only be the meat. A beef roast dinner for example will end with a forkful of beef and Yorkshire pudding, maybe even a small bit of roast potato. I try to end a full breakfast with a bit of bacon, a bit of sausage and a bit of egg making up the final mouthful. 

[Numero Veinticinco]

2 hours ago, sir roger said:

I don't , I have a friend who eats everything on the plate one by one and it sends me around the bend.

My boy is like that. It's a bit weird. Still he's technically an adult now, it's too late to return him. Anyway, I lost the receipt and, if I'm honest, I've grown quite attached to the little weirdo. 

[sir roger]

Watching somebody just eat 8 peas as one mouthful ! There can't be a court in the land that would convict me if I took matters into my own hands.