The "things that make you realise you're getting older" thread

[Guest]

[Section_31]

Swearing at weeds

[Elite]

Swearing at weeds

Made me laugh that.

[Remmie]

I have quite a long unruly garden that needs frequent trims and have been using a suped up strimmer (petrol powered brush cutter) for the past 5 years to cut the bastard as a mate told me it was quicker. Bought a black and decker mower and absolutely blitzed through it, enjoying every last moment. I have something now resembling a lawn.

 

My mate was talking absolute wham, brate.

[magicrat]

Swearing at weeds

 

I keep a bit of extra hate back for dandelions, Cunts of the the weed world.

[Spy Bee]

I went to watch Stereophonics at The Racecourse on Saturday. I hated queuing to get in, I hated queuing for beer, I hated queuing for inadequate toilets. I hated the fact it was so busy. So I watched 4 songs and fucked off to my local 'before the rush'.

 

Legitimately middle aged!

[Section_31]

I keep a bit of extra hate back for dandelions, Cunts of the the weed world.

 

They can’t be bargained with. They can’t be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And they absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.

[stringvest]

I have quite a long unruly garden that needs frequent trims and have been using a suped up strimmer (petrol powered brush cutter) for the past 5 years to cut the bastard as a mate told me it was quicker. Bought a black and decker mower and absolutely blitzed through it, enjoying every last moment. I have something now resembling a lawn.

 

My mate was talking absolute wham, brate.

 

 

you should go at your mate with the strimmer.  Fucking strimmer.

[magicrat]

They can’t be bargained with. They can’t be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And they absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.

 

They laugh at us when we're asleep

[Remmie]

you should go at your mate with the strimmer.  Fucking strimmer.

He has 3 acres to maintain as well so I thought he knew his onions.

[Bob]

It’s my birthday today - which in itself makes me realise I’m getting older, literally - but Facebook has just reminded me I was in Paris for my birthday las year with the girl I was seeing, and I’d tell tally forgot.

 

Knew I went to Paris with her but forgot it was on my birthday and forgot it was only last year.

[A Red]

It’s my birthday today - which in itself makes me realise I’m getting older, literally - but Facebook has just reminded me I was in Paris for my birthday las year with the girl I was seeing, and I’d tell tally forgot.

 

Knew I went to Paris with her but forgot it was on my birthday and forgot it was only last year.

Happy Birthday. Its mine too, its going to be as boring this year as last year

[Section_31]

Happy birthday gents

[stringvest]

Happy birthday Bob and A.  Both fine gentlemen. 

[VladimirIlyich]

I wont wish you a happy birthday as doing it actually makes you older.

[Paulie Dangerously]

Buying clothes/accessories because they look like they'll last for years

[Section_31]

Buying clothes/accessories because they look like they'll last for years

 

Me and the Mrs have come to the conclusion I'm having a midlife crisis because I'm thinking about taking up camping and canoeing, had my head shaved and have pondered the idea of a black stud earing. 

[Tony Moanero]

Me and the Mrs have come to the conclusion I'm having a midlife crisis because I'm thinking about taking up camping and canoeing, had my head shaved and have pondered the idea of a black stud earing.

Nothing wrong with camping, canoeing and shaving your head, but earrings are for pirates and gangsta footballers.

 

I had my ear pierced, when I was 15, against my dad’s wishes, although I haven’t worn an earring since I was about 17. Looking back at old photies, my dad was right, I looked a right knob.

[Paulie Dangerously]

Me and the Mrs have come to the conclusion I'm having a midlife crisis because I'm thinking about taking up camping and canoeing, had my head shaved and have pondered the idea of a black stud earing. 

 

Hiya mate.  I've bought loads of gear to go out with ToddleD in a few weeks now the weather is better.  Get yourself a knife we can go together and carve spoons 

[Section_31]

Hiya mate.  I've bought loads of gear to go out with ToddleD in a few weeks now the weather is better.  Get yourself a knife we can go together and carve spoons 

 

I think I'm looking for hobbies because I'm bored all the time. Don't see the Mrs all night as she's a teacher shoved away in our box room planning, so just end up on my phone or watching shite on Netflix. Needs to get some hobbies pronto.

[Tony Moanero]

My ma still has the A-Team tent, that I had as a kid. Been thinking of getting it back and camping out in the back garden, once a week.

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

My ma still has the A-Team tent, that I had as a kid. Been thinking of getting it back and camping out in the back garden, once a week.

Do it mate, and let me know. I love it when a plan comes together.

[Liverpool lad]

Trimmer for nose and ears ordered, it is the beginning of the end

[Anny Road]

Trimmer for nose and ears ordered, it is the beginning of the end

Careful with the nose. I trimmed the fuck out of mine when I got one. The snot was pissing out of it for weeks and it got all red raw and horrible sore as fuck. I just trim the protruding bits now.

[Liverpool lad]

Careful with the nose. I trimmed the fuck out of mine when I got one. The snot was pissing out of it for weeks and it got all red raw and horrible sore as fuck. I just trim the protruding bits now.

Thanks for that