What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

[Barrington Womble]

I had to go to Anglesey yesterday. I saw this monstrosity offered. Fuck knows what that is on the toast, the rest speaks for itself and needs no words from me. 

[Guest]

6 minutes ago, The Gaul said:

I had to go to Anglesey yesterday. I saw this monstrosity offered. Fuck knows what that is on the toast, the rest speaks for itself and needs no words from me. 

They're spelling ocean with 2 Cs. Says it all. On the toast looks like marmalade. Again, says it all. 

 

At least they've given a phone number so you can give them what they deserve. 

[Trumo]

6 minutes ago, The Gaul said:

I had to go to Anglesey yesterday. I saw this monstrosity offered. Fuck knows what that is on the toast, the rest speaks for itself and needs no words from me. 

 

It looks like someone smashed a fried egg into it after having beans dumped all over their plate.

[Barrington Womble]

4 minutes ago, Trumo said:

 

It looks like someone smashed a fried egg into it after having beans dumped all over their plate.

The beans look about the best thing on the plate! 

[Anubis]

36 minutes ago, The Gaul said:

Fuck knows what that is on the toast.

Pretty sure that’s COVID 19.

[TheHowieLama]

Its not an egg on the toast - marmalade over butter.

 

Still shite.

[A Red]

I'm having a fry up for my tea and have asked the mrs to pop an oxo cube in the saucepan with the beans. Sophistication? Dont talk to me about sophistication, I've been to Leeds.

[A Red]

1 minute ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

I like a teaspoon full of marmite stirred in. Gets you to the same place. Can you eat big fry ups after midday though ? I don’t think that’s right, a bit like eating chicken for breakfast. It’s technically possible but good people don’t do it. 

Its a strange one right enough, but if you think about it none of the ingredients of a fry up are for the morning only.

[Numero Veinticinco]

31 minutes ago, A Red said:

Sophistication? Dont talk to me about sophistication, I've been to Leeds.

Fucking great sketch, that. 

[Trumo]

37 minutes ago, TheHowieLama said:

Its not an egg on the toast - marmalade over butter.

 

Still shite.

 

Why the fuck would anyone do that? Mind you, if they drown their plate with beans, they've clearly already given up on life so won't care about the toast getting paintball-gunned with butter and marmalade.

[Barrington Womble]

41 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

I like a teaspoon full of marmite stirred in. Gets you to the same place. Can you eat big fry ups after midday though ? I don’t think that’s right, a bit like eating chicken for breakfast. It’s technically possible but good people don’t do it. 

I was thinking I might do it tomorrow. I think a fry up can be eaten anytime. 

[Guest]

55 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Oh yeah I see it now. That sausage looks odd though, weird colour and where’s the black pudding ? It’s still shit. 

Being a chip shop, I reckon the sausage is actually a saveloy. If there are places sticking that on a fryup, I'd say Global Warming and Covid-19 are the least of our problems. 

[Karl_b]

A fry-up for tea is truly one of life's great pleasures. Stupid, pescetarian wife.

 

The dog had the remnants of a chicken for breakfast this morning, he gives precisely zero fucks, and I was quite tempted by the smell and the delicious meat underneath. I'm quite interested by, and keen to try, what people eat for breakfast around the world; I used to work with an Iranian who found the idea of sausages for breakfast abhorrent but thought nothing of eating spicy food first thing.

[Tony Moanero]

1 hour ago, The Gaul said:

I was thinking I might do it tomorrow. I think a fry up can be eaten anytime. 

Of course they can.

[Tony Moanero]

1 hour ago, Fluter in Dakota said:

Being a chip shop, I reckon the sausage is actually a saveloy. If there are places sticking that on a fryup, I'd say Global Warming and Covid-19 are the least of our problems. 

Looks more like one of these bastards.

 

[TheHowieLama]

1 hour ago, The Gaul said:

I was thinking I might do it tomorrow. I think a fry up can be eaten anytime. 

Patently untrue - it can be eaten in the AM.

 

That could be 1 am but still, rules.

[TheHowieLama]

1 minute ago, Tony Moanero said:

Looks more like one of these bastards.

 

Yep, shite.

Poor mans kielbassa.

[Guest]

57 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

Looks more like one of these bastards.

 

A turd? 

[Mudface]

For the best part of a year, my youngest would only eat that shite for his school dinner. I used to hate cutting it up first thing in the morning to make his roll or sandwich, foul stuff.

[A Red]

The mrs had suggested the idea of a teatime fry up this afternoon and I was captivated, well its Saturday I thought and as I said, I told her to make sure to pop an oxo cube in the beans and she gave me a wink, I slapped her arse and off she wiggled.

 

Anyway, I sat down at the table in my shirt, collar off and braces down obviously (its the weekend) and she presented me with egg, bacon and beans. Fucking hell.

[YorkshireRed]

13 hours ago, The Gaul said:

I was thinking I might do it tomorrow. I think a fry up can be eaten anytime. 

I very much enjoy the occasional breakfast for tea. Making these is one of the wife’s many qualities. Although my Sunday Roasts trump hers, she wins hands down in the fry up championship of our house.

 

The only regular complaint I have is that she always asks if I want beans with it. As if any right minded breakfast chef should ever need to ask. 

[Barrington Womble]

The wife and kids are away this weekend, so I'm home alone eating my way through random leftovers in the fridge and freezer. So I made this fry up this morning with some tlw help. So let's start there

 

Beans - I had half a can in the fridge. I'd never thought of adding marmite or oxo to them before , no idea why as I stick marmite in all kinds. However I gave it a roll with marmite, and it was as nice as I was expecting. 

Fried bread - using the lifey method. I was always shit at fried bread till I followed his rapeseed oil and butter combo. Perfect. 

Bacon - 3 slices. Not sure what was going on with that. I think it was from my butcher, but it must have been some weird lockdown leftovers as it was much thinner than he would normally sell. It was still tasty though. 

Ulster Fry. 3 slices. Delicious. 

3 sausage - "old English" from my butcher, which are brilliant. They're very herby, like a Lincolnshire. 

Scrambled egg - the only eggs in the fridge were some crappy ones the missus had got to bake with, so I decided to make them into my scrambled eggs, flavoured up with several splashes of worcestershire sauce, butter, milk and cheese. I should eat more scrambled egg.

Fried potatoes - there was a left over baked spud in the fridge which I mashed up with some butter and cheese, added a tiny bit of paprika. 

 

All in all I was pretty happy with that considering it was made from odds and sods. But sausages are always a winner for me and the quality of them certainly made the difference. 

 

[PestiRed]

Frankly I’m surprised your wife is allowed to leave you on your own without supervision if that’s the type of thing you get up to

[lifetime fan]

Far from my best effort but when you’re cooking breakfast drinking a pint with the shakes...

 

 

[Barrington Womble]

12 minutes ago, lifetime fan said:

Far from my best effort but when you’re cooking breakfast drinking a pint with the shakes...

 

 

What's under the egg?