Premier League Round Up (Oct 15-16 2016)

[tlw content]

Manchester City have been creaking like a rusty old barn door in a hurricane of late. A draw with Celtic followed by getting their arses handed to them by Spurs, and now drawing with Everton before Leo Messi put them over his knee and spanked them in the Nou Camp.
 
Suddenly they aren’t the unbeatable team some would have had you believe. Maybe Flat Track Pep isn’t the greatest thing since sliced bread. Who knew?
 
Listen, if my life depended on picking this season’s champions, I’d still go with City, but it’s not the foregone conclusion most seemed to think it was. That said, they fucking hammered Everton on Saturday and it’s hilarious they somehow found a way to not win.
 
I fancied Everton to give them a real game so when I heard the result I was congratulating myself on knowing my shit. Then I watched the highlights and realised it was a complete fluke and this game was totally one sided. Everton could barely get out of their own half and had just 27% possession, although apparently Jose Mourinho’s stats guy says it was 40%.
 
De Bruyne and Aguero both had pens saved by Stekelenburg and in between Lukaku scored a brilliant goal on the break to put the Blues ahead. Nolito equalised with his first touch after coming on but it’s two more points dropped for City and they’re no longer out on their own at the top. They’re only one win ahead of 5th placed Chelsea now. 
 
Everton are just a point further back, and I have to admit I really like Koeman. Obviously I don’t want to as he’s a blueshite now, but he’s a good guy and a good manager, so the sooner a big club takes note of that and swoops for him the better.
 
City followed up that draw with a loss in the Champions League. They didn’t actually play too badly against Barca but that Claudio Bravo is a fucking clown and he turned what would have been a narrow defeat into a convincing one. 
 
My arl fella is obsessed with how shit Bravo is, so when I heard he’d dropped another clanger in this game my first thought was “Great, I’ll never hear the end of this now”. Honestly, any time City are mentioned he goes off on one about that keeper and how shit he is.
 
His standard comment on shit keepers is “He’s even worse than Mignolet”, but in Bravo’s case that’s definitely true. He’s like Grobbelaar only without the spectacular saves and game throwing.
 
I can’t laugh at Bravo too much though because Karius has been so fucking dodgy that even my dad wants Mignolet back between the sticks. Now bear in mind, he hates Mignolet so much that he was not only on the Bogdan bus last season, he was driving the fucking thing and would still have picked him over Simple Simon even AFTER what he did at Watford, so that tells you just how bad he thinks Karius is, and right now I can’t even put up an argument. 
 
Actually I must ask him who he thinks is worse, Bravo or Karius, that’ll keep him occupied for a few hours I reckon. He might even switch Judge Judy off and let my mum watch the telly for once while he ponders that one. 
 
Moving on now, and Bournemouth absolutely murdered Hull on Saturday. I fancied a draw, but bloody hell, Hull were diabolical. They started the season well but we’re seeing their true colours now. And those colours are brown; dogshit brown.

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[Stu Monty]

The Cresswell dive was a proper, nailed on dive. Slight tap on the foot, threw himself on the floor. Cabaye giving him top class needle after the red made me smile.

 

You bloody forwards and your dodgy penalties.

[rubble-rouser]

You can say what you like about FSG, but they are certainly not Trump supporters - big time Democrat donors.

[Trumo]

On the stadium thing, when clubs name their brand new stadium after a sponsor, it's always going to be known as that even if the stadium gets a new sponsor a few years later. Well, maybe not always.

 

Most people know Leicester's ground as the King Power Stadium, but many still call it the Walkers. It never had any other name when it was built. Mention Derby's ground and people will probably think Pride Park. It's got a different name now though.

 

In that respect, Arsenal were clever when the Emirates was being built because the site was being called Ashburton Grove long before they got stadium sponsorship. If/when that sponsorship runs out and they don't get another one, the stadium will still have a name.

 

Of course, the other side of that is Sunderland calling their ground the Stadium of Light. Who are they trying to kid with that? If they wanted to evoke the area's mining heritage, they could have gone with 'The Fuck Me I *cough* Can't See Shit Stadium'. But then they were stupid enough to change nicknames from 'The Mackems' to the 'Black Cats', sign ex-United slapdicks and hire Gollum as manager.

[dave u]

The Cresswell dive was a proper, nailed on dive. Slight tap on the foot, threw himself on the floor. Cabaye giving him top class needle after the red made me smile.

 

You bloody forwards and your dodgy penalties.

 

Rubbish. Nailed on penalty that. You defenders and your cryarsing.

 

You can say what you like about FSG, but they are certainly not Trump supporters - big time Democrat donors.

 

That's what they'd have you believe. We don't see what box they tick when they go in the booth!

[Trumo]

Bob Bradley looks like he nicked Steve Jobs' wardrobe.

[Tj hooker]

Victor fucking Anichebe the Moyesiah is turning Sunderland into a retirement home for ex bitters , spot on about the Cresswell pen certainly not a dive .

[buster69]

I actually think Guidolin was really unlucky to be let go by Swansea. I mean, they should have got at least a draw against us, and City the week beforehand. Chairmen are far too trigger happy these days. But then it was similar with Laudrup. And Monk. 

 

I think even the Reebok stadium for Bolton was too corporate. Once you're not calling a stadium after an area/great historical person, you're on dodgy ground.

 

One final thing Dave, as a non-scouser Liverpool fan, I actually have to say I really like Everton as a club. Now I know that may seem sacrilegious, but remember, I don't get to hear the fans so much, but I love Seamus Coleman (I'm Irish) and their manager and chairman are alright too....Ok. I know. You have permission to hate me. 

[dave u]

I like Koeman and Kenwright. Other than that, I'm struggling.

[JustTosh]

The former western colony really is a strange place. Somehow they’ve managed to gather all their sensible ones in the upper N/E corner of their territory. Big Democrat fans Henry & Co.

 

While we talk about the guys who’d say “pop him” when talking about manslaughter, the ones who could go into any shop and buy their “Pop-stuff” and not receive some album from the 70’s after a totally annoying undeserved defeat against i.e. Everton. While we talk about those guys, what about Bradley?

 

Don’t mock him! Roger Moore wore the same outfit in the Persuaders a couple of years back. It’s fashion mate! And I think we might be in for a surprise as far as the football thing is concerned too. So much I’d be willing to offer you a wager: One year free TLW member subscription if he’s still in charge of Swansea this time next year, Double price if he’s not.

 

Are we on?

[dave u]

Yeah why not, I'll take that bet. He's not as nailed on to be gone as Moyes, but I'll take my chances.

[JustTosh]

Yeah why not, I'll take that bet. He's not as nailed on to be gone as Moyes, but I'll take my chances.

OK. Deal!