Instant cunt identifiers

[thegreatelephant]

 

Keith Jabroni

[RedKnight]

People who have avatars more suited to horny 15 year olds rather than grown men.

[Mook]

Loud people on public transport.

 

Nobody cares about your holiday, your trip to the gym or what's happening on your Facebook page.

 

Pipe the fuck down.

[Bjornebye]

Loud people on public transport.

 

Nobody cares about your holiday, your trip to the gym or what's happening on your Facebook page.

 

Pipe the fuck down.

 

Hell yes. Getting on the bus/train talking in there phone. Just wait till you get off. It can't be THAT important. In-fact I know its not because I can hear you and you are just chatting shit. Inconsiderate public bearing breathing waste of space cunts. 

[Captain Turdseye]

I was getting a connection at Nuneaton station once and there was some twat pacing up and down the platform talking dead loud into his phone about how he was gonna knock someone out. Next minute his phone rang while he had it held up to his ear. Turns out he was talking to himself. I've haven't seen anyone go as red with embarrassment before or since.

[magicrat]

I was getting a connection at Nuneaton station once and there was some twat pacing up and down the platform talking dead loud into his phone about how he was gonna knock someone out. Next minute his phone rang while he had it held up to his ear. Turns out he was talking to himself. I've haven't seen anyone go as red with embarrassment before or since.

 

So did he punch himself in the face and fall to the platform unconscious ?

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

I was getting a connection at Nuneaton station once and there was some twat pacing up and down the platform talking dead loud into his phone about how he was gonna knock someone out. Next minute his phone rang while he had it held up to his ear. Turns out he was talking to himself. I've haven't seen anyone go as red with embarrassment before or since.

 

Hahahahaha

[Trumo]

I was getting a connection at Nuneaton station once and there was some twat pacing up and down the platform talking dead loud into his phone about how he was gonna knock someone out. Next minute his phone rang while he had it held up to his ear. Turns out he was talking to himself. I've haven't seen anyone go as red with embarrassment before or since.

 

Sounds like a pickpocket with a dilemma.

[Tony Moanero]

People who swear at and/or threaten their kids with violence. I once saw a woman in a supermarket, I forget which, with a trolley. Her son, who must have been about seven or eight, was standng in it. The woman passed the kid a box of eggs and he pissed about with them. "Break those eggs and I'll fucking headbutt you."

[Curly]

People who have avatars more suited to horny 15 year olds rather than grown men.

C.F. middle aged, usually married women posting pics of muscular men with seedy captions in them. If my missus was doing it id be asking her "the fuck you doing?"

[Curly]

People who swear at and/or threaten their kids with violence. I once saw a woman in a supermarket, I forget which, with a trolley. Her son, who must have been about seven or eight, was standng in it. The woman passed the kid a box of eggs and he pissed about with them. "Break those eggs and I'll fucking headbutt you."

Type of cunt who wouldn't say boo to another adult who would respond in kind.

[Tony Moanero]

.

[Trumo]

People who swear at and/or threaten their kids with violence. I once saw a woman in a supermarket, I forget which, with a trolley. Her son, who must have been about seven or eight, was standng in it. The woman passed the kid a box of eggs and he pissed about with them. "Break those eggs and I'll fucking headbutt you."

 

He's never going to want to make an omelette. That said, a 7-8 year old standing in a trolley is going to be on a diet of Pot Noodle and meth soon enough.

[Tony Moanero]

On another occasion, I saw a kid of about five years of age, asking his mum for sweets. Her reply was, "No, you can't have everything you want, you greedy cunt."

[Harry Squatter]

My mate was talking dead loud in his phone to some bird and asking what time her and her mate were coming round for a threesome. This other lad rung his phone and it started ringing and everyone burst out laughing at him.

[Harry Squatter]

People who use the same GIF on Faceaids and Twatter to reply to every single story. Unimaginative cunts.

[Curly]

He's never going to want to make an omelette. That said, a 7-8 year old standing in a trolley is going to be on a diet of Pot Noodle and meth soon enough.

 

Hahaha. Out of rep mate.

 

On another occasion, I saw a kid of about five years of age, asking his mum for sweets. Her reply was, "No, you can't have everything you want, you greedy cunt."

 

I know this is wrong and isn't actually funny, but reading this made me piss myself.

[Pureblood]

People who use the same GIF on Faceaids and Twatter to reply to every single story. Unimaginative cunts.

 

[General Dryness]

On another occasion, I saw a kid of about five years of age, asking his mum for sweets. Her reply was, "No, you can't have everything you want, you greedy cunt."

 

 

 

I know this is wrong and isn't actually funny, but reading this made me piss myself.

 

Its hideous really.

 

I laughed heartily.

[Guest]

[Mook]

Grown ups who get their faces painted to go to sporting events.

[General Dryness]

Grown ups who get their faces painted to go to sporting events.

Yeah, this.

[Harry Squatter]

My brother started hanging around with a load of studenty types who were all in their late 30s. One of them got a load of tickets for an England v Ireland game at Twickenham. They all decided to go in fancy dress or have their faces painted.

 

My brother told me he was going dressed as the riddler and told me thinking it was a great idea. I told him that if he went like that I would fill him and his biff mates in for being so pathetic. I also said that I hope that they go into a pub full of 6 foot 7 rugby fans and get their heads kicked in.

 

He never went but I think.some of the other biffs did. I hope they got twatted.

[manwiththestick]

Yeh, any form of dressing up is for cunts. Stag do's full of bants and "top shagger" t-shirts are for virgins who can't handle more than four pints of Fosters but claim they're all mad and their nights out are always "random".

[Captain Turdseye]

Yeh, any form of dressing up is for cunts. Stag do's full of bants and "top shagger" t-shirts are for virgins who can't handle more than four pints of Fosters but claim they're all mad and their nights out are always "random".

Think I've told this story on here before but my mate Jay used to have a Spider-Man costume and it was ace. He used to live with another lad called Mark and they both used to ride mopeds. One time Mark had gone to Bargain Booze in Runcorn Old Town for some beers and when he came out and tried to balance them between his legs on the moped they fell off and were rolling all over the floor. Everyone outside the pub next door was laughing at him and then all of a sudden Spider-Man came zooming round the corner on his scooter, screeched to a stop and helped him scoop up the beers. Cue the crowd of people in the street all chanting for Spidey as they made their way off.