Shannon Matthews' mother

[Section_31]

Have you ever heard of a criminal plot like it though?

 

"Hey let's kidnap my daughter and stick her under your bed. I'll call the police, they'll call the papers, and when someone offers a reward her uncle can find her wandering around the market and we'll claim it."

 

Allegedly

 

Is it brilliant or stupid? Or both?

[Guest PaddyBerger15]

Have you ever heard of a criminal plot like it though?

 

"Hey let's kidnap my daughter and stick her under your bed. I'll call the police, they'll call the papers, and when someone offers a reward her uncle can find her wandering around the market and we'll claim it."

 

Allegedly

 

Is it brilliant or stupid? Or both?

 

The beauty of scum is that fundamentally, they are really fucking childishly stupid.

[23_Carra_Gold]

The first thing I thought when I saw her fella was "Inbred cunt". The next time I saw him he was wearing a United jersey and being led away by the coppers. That merely confirmed he was an "Inbred cunt".

[Ted]

And a paedophile.

[Joe Strummer]

I reckon the cum stain on my bockos from this mornings wank has a higher IQ than that pair of cave dwellers put together.

 

Brilliant.

 

[cochyn]

Have you ever heard of a criminal plot like it though?

 

"Hey let's kidnap my daughter and stick her under your bed. I'll call the police, they'll call the papers, and when someone offers a reward her uncle can find her wandering around the market and we'll claim it."

 

Allegedly

 

Is it brilliant or stupid? Or both?

 

I can just imagine her lining her brood up against a wall and doing 'eenie-meeni-miney-moe' to decide which poor fucker got the gig (allegedly).

 

Joking aside: Pointing the finger is too easy, these fuckers are hopeless in a way most of us can't even begin to understand. At least Shannon has half a chance of a decent life for being taken into care and that's the only good to come out of this shitstorm.

[Randy Marsh]

Bet her piss flaps smell like Bovril.

[Anubis]

The beauty of scum is that fundamentally, they are really fucking childishly stupid.

 

That's the truth of it. If most criminals had reasonable levels of intelligence I'd be out of a job.

 

I read about a reasonbly good plot in the paper yesterday though. A 50yr old female accountant who couldn't get work basically applied for jobs, deliberately performed badly, then made an age-descrimination claim against the companies when she wasn't shortlisted. I think about ten of them paid up between £4k and £10k each. She then got greedy, and was caught while on the process of making another five claims.

[Guido]

I bet her handbag has biro on it from when she tried to see if the pen worked cos she's thick and rubbish and goes to bingo with her friend who secretly steals money from her.

[Bob]

Great insult.

 

She was Miss Dewsbury 1987.

 

I was in dewsbury hospital for a couple of days, and to be honest, i think she's stand a decent chance at Miss Dewsbury 2008.

[Bob]

And a paedophile.

 

his brain capacity was really highlighted by this. How did he not think, "oh, the police are round here quite a lot lately, i had best delete those photos"

[Section_31]

Bet her piss flaps smell like Bovril.

 

Fucking quality

 

his brain capacity was really highlighted by this. How did he not think, "oh, the police are round here quite a lot lately, i had best delete those photos"

 

It makes him even more stupid if he knew abaout the alleged plot.

 

"Hey glasses boy, we're stashing the young'un under mikes' bed at 09:00hrs tomorrow, you'd best take your PC's hard drive in the back and smash it up with an axe, police activity is going to be ramped up in these parts quite rapidly."

 

* replies in Matt Lucas voice

 

"Yeah'know!"

[Total Longo]

 

You'd have thought he would have taken his hat off at least wouldn't you?

[SammyAftershave]

It looks like the singer out of the 'Commitments', fuckin Booooooooo!

[SammyAftershave]

Bet her piss flaps smell like Bovril.

 

Classy (6)

[RoboRiise]

You'd have thought he would have taken his hat off at least wouldn't you?

 

 

That's not a hat, it's a deformity - he's just got one of the kids to write "Rockport" on his forehead.

[Scott_M]

I was in dewsbury hospital for a couple of days, and to be honest, i think she's stand a decent chance at Miss Dewsbury 2008.

 

That doesn't surprise me. Everytime I've spoken to a bird from there on a night out, their always toothless hags.