Fit birds you wouldn't shag. * Amnesty thread *

[Rafiagra]

Yeah, I'd be in there like a rat up a drainpipe too but it's always good to pretend we're picky.

 

I agree about Pamela Anderson - you just get that unclean feeling from her. However, I can't agree that Fearne Cotton should be in this thread as the title clearly says 'fit'. She looks like something off Angry Birds and needs firing off a giant catapult never to be seen again.

 

Another shout from me is Jessica Biel. Really can't see what's so great about her.

[Pony Princess]

Beyonce. Meh, don't see what all the fuss is about. Is it just that she's one of the few attractive black women celebs? I reckon if she was white she'd be b-list at best.

 

[bigbak]

Rhianna. She's got a dodgy nose.

[Uncle_Meat]

I can think of loads of fit birds I wouldn't bestow the honour of my purple headed custard chucker upon nowadays.

 

Maybe I'm getting old, but at least I'd expect them to show a certain interest in the cat, cups of tea, good books, ShiteOldBikes and maybe an appreciation of short wave radio before I cast my length into their honeypot.

[Liverpool lad]

There is a lot of them, to be honest.

 

The stand out, that hasn't been mentioned yet, but I feel needs to be mentioned is Jennifer Garner.

 

 

I'd definitely release that gigantic forehead back into the wild, if I caught it.

 

Didn't you say the same about a Miss Banks as well?

[JagSquared]

Have to agree. I would be. Unless they had some venereal disease.

 

Even then you would just double up on protection.

 

Lets be honest, most guys wouldnt turn down some kind of action (horribly disgusting aside) with most birds and that range gets bigger if you can guarantee that anyone you know would never find out.

 

If they're famous you would be telling everyone you've ever seen at any mention of said celeb no matter how annoying they were. Sure some birds dont do anything for you but if she puts her hand down your pants you'll be standing to attention ready to go at it.

 

This thread is null and void.

[Sugar Ape]

Even then you would just double up on protection.

 

Lets be honest, most guys wouldnt turn down some kind of action (horribly disgusting aside) with most birds and that range gets bigger if you can guarantee that anyone you know would never find out.

 

If they're famous you would be telling everyone you've ever seen at any mention of said celeb no matter how annoying they were. Sure some birds dont do anything for you but if she puts her hand down your pants you'll be standing to attention ready to go at it.

 

This thread is null and void.

 

Some of us are handsome men, unlike yourself, and therefore can turn clunge down knowing a better standard will be along soon.

[Guest davelfc]

If they're famous you would be telling everyone you've ever seen at any mention of said celeb no matter how annoying they were..

 

If you couldn't tell anyone at all about your conquest with a fit celebrity how bad would that be? I mean it would be torture.

 

Imagine you've just rattled Alba's world or ruined Scarlett Johansson and yet you cannot even tell your best mate.

[Sugar Ape]

If you couldn't tell anyone at all about your conquest with a fit celebrity how bad would that be? I mean it would be torture.

 

Imagine you've just rattled Alba's world or ruined Scarlett Johansson and yet you cannot even tell your best mate.

 

Would you rather get a wank of Alba and you could tell everyone or a suck off her but you had to keep it to yourself?

[brucespanner]

Would you rather get a wank of Alba and you could tell everyone or a suck off her but you had to keep it to yourself?

 

They wouldn't believe you anyway, so get pouting Jess.

[Jairzinho]

Deffo a suck treat.

 

I'd just be smug as fuck for the rest of my life.

[Sugar Ape]

They wouldn't believe you anyway, so get pouting Jess.

 

There would be picture evidence Bruce.

 

[brucespanner]

There would be picture evidence Bruce.

 

If that's a dig at my Australian heritage then fuck off you cheeky fecker.

 

With photographic eveidence I think I'd still splash tonsils, it's so much better.

 

Would she be whispering filth into your ear though as she's giving you a hand job?

[Sugar Ape]

If that's a dig at my Australian heritage then fuck off you cheeky fecker.

 

With photographic eveidence I think I'd still splash tonsils, it's so much better.

 

Would she be whispering filth into your ear though as she's giving you a hand job?

 

I'd like to think she would be uttering filth in your ear. I would splurt in her mouth as well.

[brucespanner]

I'd like to think she would be uttering filth in your ear. I would splurt in her mouth as well.

 

Now there be a Hobson's, if she had he mouth full you wouldn't get the filth, I'm confused now!

[Sugar Ape]

Now there be a Hobson's, if she had he mouth full you wouldn't get the filth, I'm confused now!

 

Best of both worlds Bruce. Show a bit of imagination. She spouts filth in your ear whilst giving you a wank and then you finish in her mouth.

[brucespanner]

Best of both worlds Bruce. Show a bit of imagination. She spouts filth in your ear whilst giving you a wank and then you finish in her mouth.

 

I was thinking more along the lines of...

 

'You'll never guess who I got a handjob off last night?'

 

'Who'

 

Jessica fucking Alba'

 

'Fuck off'

 

'Nah honest to christ, some of the shit she was coming out with would make calligula wince'

 

'Legend, do you want a pint'

 

'No I'll have a G&T cheers'

[Sugar Ape]

I was thinking more along the lines of...

 

'You'll never guess who I got a handjob off last night?'

 

'Who'

 

Jessica fucking Alba'

 

'Fuck off'

 

'Nah honest to christ, some of the shit she was coming out with would make calligula wince'

 

'Legend, do you want a pint'

 

'No I'll have a G&T cheers'

 

I was with you there all the way to the G&T, but then I thought how could Alba give a girl a handjob?

[Anubis]

I've never been fond of Jolie.

[brucespanner]

I was with you there all the way to the G&T, but then I thought how could Alba give a girl a handjob?

 

Looks like she's giving it a good try here,

 

[Elite]

Everything said has been bollocks apart from the people who said 'None'.

[Sugar Ape]

Everything said has been bollocks apart from the people who said 'None'.

 

That includes what you have just wrote, now run along ugly.

[Elite]

That includes what you have just wrote, now run along ugly.

 

I guess you turn down Movie Stars every week sweet cheeks.

[Sugar Ape]

I guess you turn down Movie Stars every week sweet cheeks.

 

Well movie stars could include the likes of Whoopi Goldberg. But yes, there are women most people say are fit who I wouldn't. See my opening post.

[Elite]

You turned down Whoopi Goldberg? Good lad.