Uncle_Meat - The Liverpool Way Jump to content


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About Uncle_Meat

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  • Occupation
    Isometric lead electric trianglist.
  • Biography
    Raised on a diet of cornflakes, nesquik and apples, I soon developed from a discarded fetus into the hirsute powerhouse that I am today. Women want to tame me, men want to be like me. My favourite cheese is lemon, and I like to dig holes in space.

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  1. Uncle_Meat

    Longest insult I ever seen

    On toast!
  2. Uncle_Meat

    Sat Navs

    I've not looked into this kind of thing for a while, but you used to have to be able to shoehorn better software upon them to get decent use out of them. I used to have this crappy no-name thing, which at the time was a quarter of the price of usual ones, with crappy software upon it. I was able to flash a WinCE image upon it and then install iGo (preferred that to tomtom) which was quite decent at the time. I just use my Android phone for that kind of thing nowadays. I've got the Sygic software, which uses the TomTom maps, and that's good enough for my needs.
  3. Uncle_Meat

    Far Cry 3

    This. I lost entire days to the first one but the second just didn't grip me in the same way. Hmm. Looks like I might need to buy myself a nice new fancy GFX card for Xmas if I want to play this at a decent framerate.
  4. Following reconstructive surgery after an unfortunate accident involving a Morris Minor and a Morris dancer in Morrisons car park, James Morrison had his entire skellington replaced with iron girders as a tribute to his favourite Scottish drink, Innes & Gunn Rum Cask.
  5. Mark Walters has got electric light, second sight and amazing powers of observation. Unfortunately, whenever he tries to phone home there is never anybody there.
  6. Uncle_Meat

    A Listers you think are shit.

    Ignoring all the record sales shit, I'm going for Cher. For her throat, just like Sonny did. She just annoys the fuck out of me.
  7. Paolo Maldini wrote the song "Candy" for Paolo Nutini. The dour minor chords are a reflection of his state of mind following Milan losing a certain European cup final to some team from the north west of England.
  8. John Scales has never weighed himself. When asked what he weighs, he answers "Sweets. lol" in a cheeky but endearing plug for his burgeoning lemon sherbet enterprise.
  9. Uncle_Meat


    Fuck me, there's a blast from the past. When I used to work on Dale Street I used to go there almost every morning for the same, crispy bacon with donkey sauce on a crusty cob. Absolutely lovely. Do the comedy lesbians still have the paper shop next door?
  10. The main sticking point about Raheem Sterling's contract is that, ironically, he wishes to be paid in sterling silver cutlery. He loves it.
  11. Uncle_Meat

    Glen John2on

    He can pinch my bog seat any time he likes, the big leg.
  12. Uncle_Meat

    Made up

    Naa, I'm sorted here in my stronghold in Wales. Got chickens for eggs, pigs for bacon and pork chops, polytunnels for veg, a herd of narky cows for milk and to also defend the perimeter and some sheep for wool. You come here throwing bars of gold at me, wanting in, and I'll just sit there smug as fuck with my cup of tea and egg and bacon banjo.
  13. As well as crows feet around his eyes, Steve McManaman also has sparrows feet at the end of his legs.
  14. Uncle_Meat

    Made up

    Gold won't be of any use to you soon enough. You're better off investing in a load of Pot Noodles instead. They'll survive the Apocalypse well enough.. Come 2013 your shoebox full of Lizzie Duke castaways with be worth fuck all compared to the 24 tins of butter beans, home made jam and boxes of Ryvita that I've got underneath the stairs.