How do you look at life?

[Mook]

I saw this the other day & thought it summed up life quite nicely...

 

The three stages of life:-

 

1. Birth

2. What the fuck is this?

3. Death

[No2]

I was in a car crash when I was 16, I thought the car was on fire and I was going to die. I didn't die and the car wasn't on fire but since then I've definitely had a positive outlook on life. Particularly around work, I've seen and heard of so many people that had heart attacks or strokes and always swore no job would drive me to stress. I work for a multinational and my policy is they will survive without me thinking about them beyond 5pm Monday to Friday. That's not just a motto it's a fact, nobody will die if I don't answer an email or phonecall so I won't. 

 

I would go as far as to say the most stressful thing in my life is the f******l and I've even dialled that right back, VAR and baldy Manc twats aside.

 

[Clem H Fandango]

25 minutes ago, JagSquared said:

How honest do we want to be here? The answer is complicated as my view is clouded on the below.

 

On the whole I am really lucky -  I was recently told by someone I’ve known since I was a kid that I’m the happiest person they know. I’ve achieved more than I ever expected, I have traveled the world, get on with my siblings and parents, have a good job that I can manage easily, am financially doing alright and most importantly I have a wonderful partner and became father this year and that kid adores me. He lights up when he sees me as I do with him. I spend as much time as I can with them them both and they genuinely make me happy. 
 

however since becoming a father my own mortality has really come into focus.

we left it late by choice and I worry I left it too late. The pressure of having someone so reliant on you feels immense sometimes and you never know if you are good enough.
 

my parents have health issues and I worry that the easy life I have had so far will run out soon and i worry that the storm is coming. 
 

I worry that I haven’t made a positive impact on anyone / the world. I wonder if I genuinely have any real friends and if they would reach out if I didn’t. I worry if anyone knows me at all or if my own family would miss me.  So maybe i am the cunt others think I am.

 

I feel I fail to make any real connections and that I’m annoying. if not for my partner and especially my kid I’m not sure if I would be here.

 

I'm a massive hypocrite i claim

fo be a lefty and i help run a charity outside of work but its essentially it’s now a second unpaid job now and im not sure how much joy it brings me. I also earn my money in industries you could consider as immoral.

 

i flip between the two views of myself amd

It clouds how i see life I’m either the luckiest man alive or not. I don’t know if this is normal but it affects my view on life. I seem to be the overly positive one to outsiders but I’m full of doubt and tired of the meaningless of it all.

 

TL/DR: who knows.

 

Beautiful heartfelt post. Keep going the way you are.

[Mudface]

Either through the bottom of a glass or night vision goggles. Both on the vernal equinox or winter solstice.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

1 hour ago, Mook said:

I saw this the other day & thought it summed up life quite nicely...

 

The three stages of life:-

 

1. Birth

2. What the fuck is this?

3. Death

 

[Jairzinho]

[3 Stacks]

A medical thing years ago basically turned me into a constant worrier with crippling health anxiety. I have an objectively decent life, but have an awful outlook on the future and it prevents me from taking next steps, finding new relationships, etc... I always think no one else wants to hear about or have a share of my problems in their own life.

 

Before that, in comparison, I was floating on a cloud with no real worries. But based on the fact, my issue wasn't even life threatening, even if it hadn't happened, I can't imagine I'd have ended up any different. First sort of event that would have shook me a little would have probably sent me in a similar tailspin and I'd look at life in the same negative way.

[Rushies tash]

Always thankful for what I have, and always remember that there are people worse off than me. Those who have more, fair play to them, couldn't give a fuck. After CBT a couple of years back, I try not to judge anything - either my own actions or the actions of others. We're all doing our best and hopefully we can all help each other achieve whatever it is we're looking for. Love you all x

[Anubis]

Regrets, I've had a few. But then again too few to mention. I did what I had to do, I saw it through without exemption. I planned each charted course, each careful step along the byway. And more, much, much more I did it, I did it my way.

[sir roger]

I do get the impression that the average level of intelligence on here is extremely high, and this can sometimes be an issue as most of the truly happy people I have met are too thick to worry about anything

[Bjornebye]

I read the opening post then couldn't read anyone else's input (although I did see a window les mis perv gif and checked) 

 

Changes constantly. Right this second I'm positive for the future I guess. Last 5/6 months I've been fighting my own head not to get to the place where I was hoping I could spend a day getting as drunk as I can to just end it all. Citalopram has helped but mistakes and shit.... I'm a good lad but I'm too impulsive and make stupid mistakes. The world's a cunt hole but another way of looking at it is, the worlds the cunt hole that you make it. 

 

For all the shit in the world, there's some fucking brilliant people on this planet and it's time we all gravitated towards that. 

 

If you're happy or sad or unsure, I hope you find a way to breath in and remind yourself that you're the lucky one. xx 

 

Oh and Dire Straits are boss. 

[Lee909]

1 hour ago, Bjornebye said:

 

For all the shit in the world, there's some fucking brilliant people on this planet and it's time we all gravitated towards that. 

 

If you're happy or sad or unsure, I hope you find a way to breath in and remind yourself that you're the lucky one. xx 

 

Oh and Dire Straits are boss. 

 

 

Pretty much it

Isolate the good bits and try and ignore the rest. I rarely keep up with the news, what's going on in the world anymore. Keep out of the loop as much as possible. Easier done working and living a permanent night shift I guess

 

Watch some sports, good TV shows. Listen to music whatever

 

 

 

 

Oh and fuck social media off ASAP

Can't help anyone's brain, it's a great idea but is a warped shithole to plunge you into a never ending stream of vile shite of doom scrolling. 

[Turkish Delight]

I don't have any spiritual or religious beliefs so I think that helps shape my outlook a lot. I won't be here forever and in a hundred years I'll be pretty much forgotten so the only things that are truly important are the happiness of me, my kids and the people around me.

 

Little things that happen during a day and at work don't stress me as they're only things that are being done at a point in time and I have bigger priorities than things like my career.

 

I view money as a means to an end and I'm not impressed by expensive things. I've been to places with very wealthy people through work and experienced things probably not many get to but I'm happier having a week in Benidorm on the piss with my mates. In contrast Monaco for example is my idea of hell on earth.

 

As with anyone I have cycles of good and bad times. The only way through the bad times is making the little changes I can to make things better and to not waste time worrying about things I can't change. That can be easier said than done at times and as a single dad there are times loneliness has kicked in a little despite having lots of friends but I know that all times pass and those times do too.

 

Overall I think I'm a decent fella and try to be friendly to people I meet if they are to me. I see myself as no better or worse than anyone else and I'm quite happy with that.

[chrisbonnie]

ill be brutally honest and seem to be finding the monotony of being middle aged rather tough at times. 

 

nothing negative in my life per se, but generally just finding life hard at the moment. 

 

ive no money worries what so ever, have a wife and two young children, all healthy. the young lad is on the spectrum, i definitely find that difficult, dealing with the tantrums etc.....

 

maybe its the fact you see your friends less, or that your time is less "your time" when hit your 40's that i find awkward, i dont know, i cant put my finger on it. 

 

some days i feel rather down about it, the little things like waking up and having to get someone else sorted before looking after yourself. i know i sound like a selfish prick, and i dare never say it to the wife. But it can be bloody draining cant it. 

 

 

 

[YorkshireRed]

8 minutes ago, chrisbonnie said:

the young lad is on the spectrum

I think there’s a few of us on here with kids on the spectrum. My youngest, was only recently diagnosed, and is probably at the low end in terms of potential challenges it brings. 
 

I find it very difficult sometimes though. I worry for his future. The wife and I also have different views on how best to support him, which brings a level of tension I could do without. 
 

In short, you’re not alone mate. I definitely don’t have any answers but I can at least empathise. 

[Bobby Hundreds]

I look at it thankfully. I think the universe is absolute magic.

[chrisbonnie]

21 minutes ago, YorkshireRed said:

I think there’s a few of us on here with kids on the spectrum. My youngest, was only recently diagnosed, and is probably at the low end in terms of potential challenges it brings. 
 

I find it very difficult sometimes though. I worry for his future. The wife and I also have different views on how best to support him, which brings a level of tension I could do without. 
 

In short, you’re not alone mate. I definitely don’t have any answers but I can at least empathise. 

 

I find it very hard at times. Like your child, our lad is ever so slightly on the spectrum. No issues academically, is a good mixer with other kids. But his tantrums and mood swings are frightening at times. He's terrible in the mornings. Like someone with depression. I work in construction, so I'm out every day. We've a small family business, but often with my young lad in the mornings, I wouldn't just leave my wife to deal with the tantrums, so obviously I'll get to work late. 

 

Then I'll get the mickey taking "for waltzing in whenever I want" 

 

If they had my morning routine for 1 day, they'd soon change their tune. 

 

Again, I'm sounding like it's all me, me me. 

 

Maybe this is the "mid life crisis" you read about. 

 

Now I see why they go out and buy motorbikes. Probably just an excuse to get out of the house

[YorkshireRed]

1 minute ago, chrisbonnie said:

 

I find it very hard at times. Like your child, our lad is ever so slightly on the spectrum. No issues academically, is a good mixer with other kids. But his tantrums and mood swings are frightening at times. He's terrible in the mornings. Like someone with depression. I work in construction, so I'm out every day. We've a small family business, but often with my young lad in the mornings, I wouldn't just leave my wife to deal with the tantrums, so obviously I'll get to work late. 

 

Then I'll get the mickey taking "for waltzing in whenever I want" 

 

If they had my morning routine for 1 day, they'd soon change their tune. 

 

Again, I'm sounding like it's all me, me me. 

 

Maybe this is the "mid life crisis" you read about. 

 

Now I see why they go out and buy motorbikes. Probably just an excuse to get out of the house

It’s not “me, me, me” to air your frustrations. They’ve got to go somewhere and here is as good a place as any. 
 

None of us are perfect. There’s no ‘user guide’ for every kid on the spectrum as they’re all different. We just try and do the best we can, as often as we can. 

[A Red]

Appreciate life's rare but beautiful gifts

 

 

 

 

 

[markcd]

2 hours ago, YorkshireRed said:

It’s not “me, me, me” to air your frustrations. They’ve got to go somewhere and here is as good a place as any. 
 

None of us are perfect. There’s no ‘user guide’ for every kid on the spectrum as they’re all different. We just try and do the best we can, as often as we can. 

 

Agree with this 100%. It's really hard but you should try and look after yourself first. That doesn't come naturally to lots of people, but it's like that announcement on planes where they tell you to put your oxygen mask on first before helping others. It's turned into a bit of a cliche - but imo it's true. 

 

[Section_31]

3 hours ago, Bobby Hundreds said:

I look at it thankfully. I think the universe is absolute magic.

 

 

[TheHowieLama]

17 hours ago, Stouffer said:

At the moment it looks like this, which is pretty sweet really.

 

Do you have a Peking duck shrine?