Drinking to oblivion and making a tit of yourself!!!

[Fugitive]

That was me tonight.

 

Some bird I've been grooming for a while was receptive to my advances but I drank far too much before I even met up with her, accidentally insulted here, fell over a few times, scared her away by making inappropriate jokes, vomiting in a bar and then sobering up when you get in and realising what you've done.

 

Great fun

[moof]

You should have just wore some blue trousers or something. She'd have been frothing at the gash and blind to your drunkeness.

[Fugitive]

Blind to the drunkeness!!! Stevie fucking wonder would have seen the state I was in. The annoying thing is that I now feel soberish and remember nearly everything I've done. Not been that pissed in a long long time. I feel half disappointed and half proud at the same time.

[Remmie]

Did you shit yourself?

[Joe Le Taxi]

Kill her.

 

It's the only way.

[Guest The Big Green Bastard]

Pics of girl?

[Paulie Dangerously]

Claim you were spiked

[lifetime fan]

Claim you were spiked

 

 

I thought they called it pegged?

[Paulie Dangerously]

I thought they called it pegged?

 

Isn't that being buggared by a woman with a dildo?

 

Edit -duuuhhhhhhhh me

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

I went out and bought everyone in the bar shots before erupting at my girlfriend. We Might be finished. I don't know. I literally couldn't tie my shoes. Even if I could find them. Happy birthday rotoq. You silly Cunt.

[Paulie Dangerously]

I went out and bought everyone in the bar shots before erupting at my girlfriend. We Might be finished. I don't know. I literally couldn't tie my shoes. Even if I could find them. Happy birthday rotoq. You silly Cunt.

 

If she still let you paint her face white you can't be in that much trouble

[zigackly]

I went out and bought everyone in the bar shots before erupting at my girlfriend. We Might be finished. I don't know. I literally couldn't tie my shoes. Even if I could find them. Happy birthday rotoq. You silly Cunt.

 

Only consolation to overdoing it when I was a drinker used to be making it up in the aftermath with hangover sex.

 

Get round there with some flowers sharpish.

[lifetime fan]

At my nans 80th years back I got absolutely cunted, I was actually pissed at a lunch time event and instead of getting off home for a few hours kip thought it would be a great idea to go on a day long session.

 

I turned up at the evening do with some bird I'd chatted up in the workmans club round the corner (she went on to show my ol fella and my uncle her pierced nipples), managed to piss her off and inform her in one of those shouting whispers in front of everyone if she left now she wouldn't be getting any 'Goodloving Groombridge' later. She went anyway.

 

I eventually got home at 4 in the morning (the party ended at midnight and it's a 45 minute walk at most) but was that pissed I couldn't get the key in the door.

 

I was woken by a neighbour at 8 o'clock the next morning asleep on the bonnet of his car bollock naked with all my clothes folded perfectly on the pavement next to the car.

[VladimirIlyich]

At my nans 80th years back I got absolutely cunted' date=' I was actually pissed at a lunch time event and instead of getting off home for a few hours kip thought it would be a great idea to go on a day long session.

 

I turned up at the evening do with some bird I'd chatted up in the workmans club round the corner (she went on to show my ol fella and my uncle her pierced nipples), managed to piss her off and inform her in one of those shouting whispers in front of everyone if she left now she wouldn't be getting any 'Goodloving Groombridge' later. She went anyway.

 

I eventually got home at 4 in the morning (the party ended at midnight and it's a 45 minute walk at most) but was that pissed I couldn't get the key in the door.

 

I was woken by a neighbour at 8 o'clock the next morning asleep on the bonnet of his car bollock naked with all my clothes folded perfectly on the pavement next to the car.[/quote']

 

They dont half make that cider strong down there.

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

Only consolation to overdoing it when I was a drinker used to be making it up in the aftermath with hangover sex.

 

Get round there with some flowers sharpish.

 

I'm there. I woke up there with a smile on my face and want to give her a good morning kiss, but was interrupted by a list of crimes I had committed. Now I'm in her living room watching goals on Sunday because her step dad is watching it and I can't move. No doubt our fucking disaster Will be on shortly.

 

Worst.birthday.ever

[lifetime fan]

They dont half make that cider strong down there.

 

 

I'd had, Westons, Thatchers, Stowford and Natch.

 

EDIT: I don't drink anymore.

[lifetime fan]

I'm there. I woke up there with a smile on my face and want to give her a good morning kiss, but was interrupted by a list of crimes I had committed. Now I'm in her living room watching goals on Sunday because her step dad is watching it and I can't move. No doubt our fucking disaster Will be on shortly.

 

Worst.birthday.ever

 

 

Ahahaha

 

I know that pain Brother.

[Captain Turdseye]

No doubt Fuge has gone back to sleep. What he should have done is waited for the offy to open and carry on drinking. Alone. Like a real man.

[lifetime fan]

No doubt Fuge has gone back to sleep. What he should have done is waited for the offy to open and carry on drinking. Alone. Like a real man.

 

 

Drink through the pain.

[The Golden Eel]

Can't remember the last time I drank and didn't make a tit of myself tbh.

[Fugitive]

I've just checked my pockets and I've somehow managed to come home with more money than I went out with. I spent a fair bit last night so I've got no fucking clue where it has come from.

 

Before anyone suggests... No, pretty sure I never got bummed for money.

[lifetime fan]

I've just checked my pockets and I've somehow managed to come home with more money than I went out with. I spent a fair bit last night so I've got no fucking clue where it has come from.

 

Before anyone suggests... No, pretty sure I never got bummed for money.

 

 

Check your bank balance.

[Dr Nowt]

 

Check your bank balance.

 

On the money. Went out a few Fridays back after the usual painful day moving house. Was still pulling card receipts out days later for bars I don't even remember going to.

[Hooch]

Check your bank balance.

 

This.

[Hooch]

At my nans 80th years back I got absolutely cunted, I was actually pissed at a lunch time event and instead of getting off home for a few hours kip thought it would be a great idea to go on a day long session.

 

I turned up at the evening do with some bird I'd chatted up in the workmans club round the corner (she went on to show my ol fella and my uncle her pierced nipples), managed to piss her off and inform her in one of those shouting whispers in front of everyone if she left now she wouldn't be getting any 'Goodloving Groombridge' later. She went anyway.

 

I eventually got home at 4 in the morning (the party ended at midnight and it's a 45 minute walk at most) but was that pissed I couldn't get the key in the door.

 

I was woken by a neighbour at 8 o'clock the next morning asleep on the bonnet of his car bollock naked with all my clothes folded perfectly on the pavement next to the car.

 

Class.