Are you a sad cunt? Examples of your sad cuntedness

[General Dryness]

What about Aliens?

I've never eaten one or given one a clip round the ear.

[Captain Turdseye]

I spent years battering my stepson at PES and telling him he was an idiot for buying FIFA every year. Then when he finally listened, bought PES, got good and started beating me regularly I threw my toys out of the pram and now I flat out refuse to play against him when he asks.

 

He turned 13 yesterday and thankfully he's still shit at bowling, air hockey and pool so this weekend has been a good one for me.

[Sputnik1]

I let a woman take me for a cunt, rob my life savings and then spent 9 months moping about her to the point that I tried to kill myself 3 times. 

 

 

To be fair, that's called being a man. 

 

Get on youtube and watch a few vids by 'Sandman' you don't have to sign up to anything but it might help you be aware in the future and feel a little less like a sad cunt now, because you're not alone and you're not a sad cunt. 

[ZonkoVille77]

I get in a Star Wars pun at every opportunity during conversations which is pretty sad, but hey it's probably the dark side of my personality.

[Champ]

Aye she can drive you to distraction

I was only trying to be kind

[Sputnik1]

I get in a Star Wars pun at every opportunity during conversations which is pretty sad, but hey it's probably the dark side of my personality.

 

 

[Guest Pistonbroke]

I also sing on the bus when I think nobody is around. Not so much now that everything is on camera - especially as everything I sing somehow gets the words changed to utterly crude alternatives.

 

Pretty sure I have caused unseen grannies behind me to have heart attacks.

 

I thought that was normal, I'm always doing it which annoys the wife. 

[Babb'sBurstNad]

I was watching a programme about Sophia Loren before and there was a clip of her dancing about with her massive tits and I found myself looking at the old drum kit the boy was playing in the background rather than her mammalian protuberances.

 

We've all done something similar. I bookmarked a vid on pornhub because it had a sideboard I liked in the background.

[Babb'sBurstNad]

I get in a Star Wars pun at every opportunity during conversations which is pretty sad, but hey it's probably the dark side of my personality.

 

Nothing wrong with that. I enjoy reenacting famous lines from films to my 5 year old nephew when we're playing. He approves of Tony Montana's "Say hello to my little friend" as we have a gun fight, but isn't sure about Terry Malloy's contender speech. 

 

I also have signed pictures of Jeremy Bulloch, who played Boba Fett and Rusty Goffe who was a Jawa.

[Fowlers God]

I turned 30 last month, I'm married with three kids.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

I turned 30 last month, I'm married with three kids.

 

We have three kids, first one popped out when I was 31. Lived life to the full beforehand, we just preferred to do it that way rather than living it up in our 40's. The youngest is 10, so another 6-8 years to go and its the high life again. 

[Fowlers God]

We have three kids, first one popped out when I was 31. Lived life to the full beforehand, we just preferred to do it that way rather than living it up in our 40's. The youngest is 10, so another 6-8 years to go and its the high life again.

She wants more. Seriously our youngest is 3 so by the time I'm 45 he will be 18. Obviously my parental responsibility doesn't waiver but I can have some sort of a life back. My wife and I knew about our first 5 months into our relationship so it will be nice being able to court properly.

 

I'm just miserable about being 30 and having to book a Monday off work cause I've gone out on Saturday night.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

She wants more. Seriously our youngest is 3 so by the time I'm 45 he will be 18. Obviously my parental responsibility doesn't waiver but I can have some sort of a life back. My wife and I knew about our first 5 months into our relationship so it will be nice being able to court properly.

 

I'm just miserable about being 30 and having to book a Monday off work cause I've gone out on Saturday night.

 

I'd love to be 30 again, just enjoy it mate. 

[VladimirIlyich]

I turned 30 last month, I'm married with three kids.

I was 24 when my 3rd,and youngest popped out. I've never had much of a life or lived it up.

[Josef Svejk]

I have followed Simple Minds for over 35 years, forgot how many gigs I've been too. We went to see them at the Empire the other year really good seats and Jim Kerr was pointing towards us, the people in front looked back as did we, the people behind pointed to us and as we turned around he was pointing at us nodding and waving. I felt like a kid at Christmas.

 

[Alan Sex]

Shit. I'll be 60 when my youngest turns 18.

Wife will be 48.

 

No chance I'll be able to keep up.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

Shit. I'll be 60 when my youngest turns 18.

Wife will be 48.

 

No chance I'll be able to keep up.

 

Same here. 

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

His microphone looks like an ice cream ?

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

Shit. I'll be 60 when my youngest turns 18.

Wife will be 48.

 

No chance I'll be able to keep it up.

 

We've got your back Alan

[AngryOfTuebrook]

I've spent most of the night doing Sudoku.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

I've spent most of the night doing Sudoku.

 

I bet you were finished in 5 minutes...all night....pfft. 

[Alan Sex]

I've spent most of the night doing Sudoku.

Funny name for a blow up doll. Made in Japan?

[Shitty Arse]

I enjoy the solitude and escapism of going the flicks on me own sometimes. Specifically a midweek matinee on me day off if I have the time. There's something quite therapeutic about fucking the whole world off for a couple of hours whilst everyone else is at work.

[plazzy]

I enjoy the solitude and escapism of going the flicks on me own sometimes. Specifically a midweek matinee on me day off if I have the time. There's something quite therapeutic about fucking the whole world off for a couple of hours whilst everyone else is at work.

 

Was at a bit of low ebb years ago after ending up on the dole, so decided one afternoon after a couple of joints that in my eternal wisdom i should take myself off to the cinema to watch the Passion of the Christ.

 

There was literally just me and these two old ladies watching it but they gave up after about 10 minutes of JC getting a good thrashing and buggered off (not sure what they were expecting).

 

The relentless torture on screen combined with the realisation that i was now not only jobless but in the cinema on my own made it a proper confidence boosting afternoon.

[Tony Moanero]

Going to the cinema on your own is boss. You can't talk during the film anyway. Going the pub on your own is sound, too. Good book and a pint or ten.