January Transfer window 2012

[James21]

Would love if we brought in a big name player, would really lift the place.

 

yeah because we are all so upset and disgruntled at the moment, what with kenny back, playing the best football seen at anfield in years and having a truly world class player lighting up our lives every week. Fuck me i've never been so down.

 

2 years ago we were going for the title watching Gerrard in his pomp next to the best striker on earther at the time, backed up by the best midfield partnership argueabley on earth at the time in Xabi and Mash, whilst we, in the same week, destroyed Real Madrid and Manchester United, banging 4 past both of them. Now we have one world class player, our TWO best midfielders out with injuries, one for the next 6 months and the other till god knows when, and we are sitting in 6th place.

 

By a lift I mean a shot in the arm, the way Kenny was last season, and the way Suarez was last season, if we brought in Cavani or someone of that ilk, can you imagine the buzz around the place? The place would be bouncing and EVERYONE would be confident of top 4, and maybe the atmophere would return in the stadium.

[Frankenhooker]

Would love if we brought in a big name player, would really lift the place.

 

If I had a choice, I would love Fernando back, as much as I try I just cant bring myself to hate him, the memories of what he did here are to strong. Everyone makes mistakes.

 

IMO the fee would be great, 20M for Torres? We would be mad not to, because even if he flopped massively, we could still ship him out for 10-15M so we would hardly take a loss, and the potential upside is huge.

 

A 30 year old Crouch went for 10M for crying out loud, so without doubt Torres would.

 

Darren Bent cost 24M for gods sakes.

 

Anyway, what I think will happen is we bring in a couple more players with "potential" *sigh*

 

And Darren Bent is currently a better forward than Torres. Villa Boas has vehemently denied he's for sale anyway.

[usernameunknown]

IMO the fee would be great, 20M for Torres? We would be mad not to

 

Oh yeah, how daft not spending £20m and £5m - £7m a year on wages on a player who's hardly scored in a year and looks way past his best.

[jon lad]

Yeah absolutely agree with that James, I just can't help but be thankful for the simple things and am relatively happy compared to just over a year ago.

 

Oh and nothing will make the atmosphere increase in the stadium until somehow the club sacrifice a little in terms of profits from matchday ticket revenue (which won't ever happen of course). the away games this season in the cc have been great and mainly because there are plenty of young scouse lads out for a good time, whereas anfield has become a shrine to its former self full of holiday makers etc.. If only there was a way of getting more tickets out to our core support at an affordable cost, then the atmosphere would return.

[Trumo]

Is James21 any relation to Glock21?

 

Both love to moan about the club, but James21 in particular seems very hung up on the cost of players and wages/bonuses without actually having a point.

 

It's what you get out of players that is important, not what you're paying them. A player might just be happy at a particular club so won't be particularly bothered that he's not the top earner there or in general.

[James21]

Oh yeah, how daft not spending £20m and £5m - £7m a year on wages on a player who's hardly scored in a year and looks way past his best.

 

The same guy who finished 3rd top scorer for us last season despite leaving in January, and scored 9 goals at the half way point of the season despite being managed by Roy bloody hodgson in one of the darkest times in the clubs history?

 

Not a bad return is it? If he had stayed with us I would be fully confident he would have reached 20 goals for the season because he looked good under the short time Kenny was here before he left, think he got like 4 in 4.

[James21]

Is James21 any relation to Glock21?

 

Both love to moan about the club, but James21 in particular seems very hung up on the cost of players and wages/bonuses without actually having a point.

 

It's what you get out of players that is important, not what you're paying them. A player might just be happy at a particular club so won't be particularly bothered that he's not the top earner there or in general.

 

 

21 is a tribute to my favourite player. Lucas.

 

I am not hung up on what we pay players, I am hung up on the club getting value. It is like we learnt nothing for Hicks and Gillette. You cant just go about spending money, remember Joe Cole for 90k, and Aqua for 20M and 80k a week, look how that is still hurting the club.

[WaltonRed]

I'm very happy with how its going.

 

No to both the Chelsea rat and the barca one from me.

[Gym Beglin]

STRIKER

 

I'd enquire about Asamoah Gyan now. Politely, but sternly.

 

I'd enquire about Samuel Etoo in the Summer, from that weirdo club. Yes, he's making a packet there but I'm sure he won't last 3 years in Siberia, and he only signed a 3 year deal. 'Go home Sambo', that's the banner I'd use to urge him to return to europe proper.

 

I'd ask about Artem Milevski from Dynamo Kiev, at 6'3" he'd be able to handle himself, but also good on the deck. Also great with a rifle, and trustworthy to a fault. I once borrowed £40 off him at an airport and said I'd pay him back. I then jetted off to Miami for 9 days. Lo and behold, Artem was at the foot of my bed, at 3.40am, with a shiv pressed into my back just 48 hours later. He requested the money back.

 

I'd then phone Lyon about Lisandro Lopez, and ask them to describe Lopez to me in one sentence or less.

 

And then I'd try to baffle Sevilla by demanding £33m in installments for Negredo, or I'll sell him elsewhere.

 

 

WINGER

 

I'd ask Lille about Hazard, and then when they tell me the price, I'll spit in their faces and tell them to fuck off back to their rustic farmhouses, the cunts.

 

I'd then politely ask Ajax about Christian Eriksson.

 

I'd also pick up the phone and speak at length with anyone from Sporting Lisbon about any of their wingers, regardless of whether I've heard of them or not, they just fucking grow them.

 

I'd also fax Lyon and say to them, "That Gourcuff lad, he cost you a fair whack didn't he? How many titles have you won since then? Exactly, give us a go on him for £14m", and I'd send another one saying "Michel Bastos eleven mill" two minutes later.

 

 

 

DEFENSIVE MIDFIELDER

 

First off, a swift call to Mrs M'Vila, offering her protection and good luck from evil spirits, and that her husband would earn millions of 'Golds' from us for his work. Once she traced my call and accused me of racism, I'd try to placate her with a new house for her parents.

 

Undeterred, I'd then dial the number of Porto and demand to speak to the agent of Joao Moutinho, saying that I'm his doctor and that I must tell him something of great importance. The receptionist tells me that he is unavailable. I burst out crying and say "so young, so fucking young...", at which point the phone goes dead.

 

I feel lucky, nobody gets De Rossi, nobody even bothers to ask him. I phone him, I man up, "Danielle", I say, "sign for Libpool and we'll make a real legend out of you". He whistles loudly down the phone, I whistle back harder, the line scrambles and eventually I receive a fax telling me to fuck off.

 

I then fax Leroy Fer and Kevin Streetman, sending them a detailed picture of my penis with a question mark being spunked out of the end of it, and a puddle of cum making the dot on the end of a question mark. I rage, "what's the point at the end of a question mark called?". Neither of them know.

[BookableOffense]

STRIKER

 

I'd enquire about Asamoah Gyan now. Politely, but sternly.

 

I'd enquire about Samuel Etoo in the Summer, from that weirdo club. Yes, he's making a packet there but I'm sure he won't last 3 years in Siberia, and he only signed a 3 year deal. 'Go home Sambo', that's the banner I'd use to urge him to return to europe proper.

 

I'd ask about Artem Milevski from Dynamo Kiev, at 6'3" he'd be able to handle himself, but also good on the deck. Also great with a rifle, and trustworthy to a fault. I once borrowed £40 off him at an airport and said I'd pay him back. I then jetted off to Miami for 9 days. Lo and behold, Artem was at the foot of my bed, at 3.40am, with a shiv pressed into my back just 48 hours later. He requested the money back.

 

I'd then phone Lyon about Lisandro Lopez, and ask them to describe Lopez to me in one sentence or less.

 

And then I'd try to baffle Sevilla by demanding £33m in installments for Negredo, or I'll sell him elsewhere.

 

 

WINGER

 

I'd ask Lille about Hazard, and then when they tell me the price, I'll spit in their faces and tell them to fuck off back to their rustic farmhouses, the cunts.

 

I'd then politely ask Ajax about Christian Eriksson.

 

I'd also pick up the phone and speak at length with anyone from Sporting Lisbon about any of their wingers, regardless of whether I've heard of them or not, they just fucking grow them.

 

I'd also fax Lyon and say to them, "That Gourcuff lad, he cost you a fair whack didn't he? How many titles have you won since then? Exactly, give us a go on him for £14m", and I'd send another one saying "Michel Bastos eleven mill" two minutes later.

 

 

 

DEFENSIVE MIDFIELDER

 

First off, a swift call to Mrs M'Vila, offering her protection and good luck from evil spirits, and that her husband would earn millions of 'Golds' from us for his work. Once she traced my call and accused me of racism, I'd try to placate her with a new house for her parents.

 

Undeterred, I'd then dial the number of Porto and demand to speak to the agent of Joao Moutinho, saying that I'm his doctor and that I must tell him something of great importance. The receptionist tells me that he is unavailable. I burst out crying and say "so young, so fucking young...", at which point the phone goes dead.

 

I feel lucky, nobody gets De Rossi, nobody even bothers to ask him. I phone him, I man up, "Danielle", I say, "sign for Libpool and we'll make a real legend out of you". He whistles loudly down the phone, I whistle back harder, the line scrambles and eventually I receive a fax telling me to fuck off.

 

I then fax Leroy Fer and Kevin Streetman, sending them a detailed picture of my penis with a question mark being spunked out of the end of it, and a puddle of cum making the dot on the end of a question mark. I rage, "what's the point at the end of a question mark called?". Neither of them know.

 

Somebody get this man a beer. He's earned it.

[Funkasy]

To bad most of those players will be played out of posittion if he classes them like he did there

[Gym Beglin]

I always liked Gyan, thought he looked very handy as a striker.

 

Whether or not he would get on Suarez, that's another story.

[NorwegianRed]

Big fucking no thanks to Gyan and his shitty little goal celebration dance.

[Trumo]

I always liked Gyan, thought he looked very handy as a striker.

 

Whether or not he would get on Suarez, that's another story.

 

Just a few things really:

 

1 - Gyan's loan agreement with Al Ain doesn't allow for Sunderland to bring him back early, so you have to assume it cannot be broken for a move to another club either;

 

2 - Gyan has already played for 2 different clubs this season (I definitely remember him playing at Anfield on the opening day of the season) so cannot play for another club until the following season;

 

3 - The Suarez thing is bollocks. Suarez was rightly punished for the offence at the time. It is Gyan who fucked up by missing the subsequent penalty. That it was the last kick of extra-time is irrelevant because there was absolutely no injustice in how the matter was dealt with at the time. Quite why he should hate Suarez, or indeed exactly why Suarez became a hate figure for so many for a "controversial" incident, is lost on me.

[MLB]

I'd rather have Steven Fletcher than Gyan.

[James21]

where has this mash rumour come from

[robslappa]

I'd rather have Steven Fletcher than Gyan.

 

So would I.

[Megadrive Man]

I'd rather have Steven Fletcher than Gyan.

 

So would I.

[Guest LFD]

I'd rather Torres than Steven Fletcher.

[Unrighteous]

I'd rather Torres than Steven Fletcher.

 

We're not talking sexually.

[Red Phoenix]

I want Taylor Fletcher and I want him now. And not sexually.

[Josef Svejk]

This is the only Fletcher we need (hubba, hubba):

 

 

 

[dennis tooth]

Pretty sure james21 is abramovic.

Why would we want a player who has scored 5 in 35? Heskey would be spinning his decks in his grave.

Embarrasing.

Even if he was banging in the goals I still wouldnt buy him.

All this fawning is knocking me sick, he is a player who clearly doesnt give a shit about you fans and all you can do is urge the club to blow 20m on him?

If you want to Id like to volunteer myself to walloping your girlfreinds while youre at it if you dont mind.

He is slow, cant stay on his feet, misses the easiest of chances, week in week out, Id rather have sturridge, in fact Id sooner stick with Carroll. Similar strike rate but might actually get better.

People need to find themselves some imagination, read a book and dont watch so much tv.

[TheHowieLama]

People need to find themselves some imagination, read a book and dont watch so much tv.

 

[Evil_Ways]

Pretty sure james21 is abramovic.

Why would we want a player who has scored 5 in 35? Heskey would be spinning his decks in his grave.

Embarrasing.

Even if he was banging in the goals I still wouldnt buy him.

All this fawning is knocking me sick, he is a player who clearly doesnt give a shit about you fans and all you can do is urge the club to blow 20m on him?

If you want to Id like to volunteer myself to walloping your girlfreinds while youre at it if you dont mind.

He is slow, cant stay on his feet, misses the easiest of chances, week in week out, Id rather have sturridge, in fact Id sooner stick with Carroll. Similar strike rate but might actually get better.

People need to find themselves some imagination, read a book and dont watch so much tv.

 

I'd say 99% of every player bought thinks of himself before he thinks of the fans for whatever club he's playing for. I obviously agree Torres fucked us over with the timing of his transfer. But he's still the best striker we've had since Fowler in his prime. He scored 9 goals in 22 games for us last season, half arsing it. And finnished his career for us with a scoring ratio in the PL with like 0.7 goals per game. He's shown flashes of his brilliance for Chelsea, but he's simply not clicking there, confidence in combination with how they play i suppose. But he's still got his burst of pace and his power. Not that i think there is a chance of us getting him back, but if by some miracle it happened i wouldnt complain. Generally i think football fans are somewhat fickle, and IMO all it would take for the majority of our fans to forgive him would be him admitting he was wrong and score a couple of goals. Not that it'll happen, but still.