Instant cunt identifiers

[Dr Nowt]

12 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

Piers Morgan is like that, he did some show years ago where people were showing him around their houses, he only had to see a gold door knob and he looked like he was gonna cum. That's probably why he likes the brash vulgarian types like Trump and Sugar. 

 

 

An old mate’s wife is good friends with a Bournemouth lass (absolutely fucking red hot in her day btw) one of them property cunt Candy brothers was with for years before he married Holly Valance. Regularly used to get told mock down-to-earth tales of good old Nick rolling his own eyes at himself while making a self-deprecating comment about thinking he’s James Bond when turning up to their social engagements in a helicopter, etc.
 

The fascinating thing I find is that absolutely no level of blatantly hostile sarcasm or open disdain breaks through to a person delivering such a humble brag. I’ve really road tested this one in my able to lose good friendships within one conversation signature style. They remain completely impervious to it, like a social cues version of Batfink’s wings being a shield of steel.

[Remmie]

On 08/10/2020 at 14:32, Colonel Kurtz said:

Double barrelled names particularly if neither name is historically significant. I can imagine if I married a Rothschild (if only) she’d want to keep the name but when a bloke from Kwik Fit marries a women off the deli counter at Sainsbury’s and they call themselves mr and mrs Smith - Wilson, it’s just wank.  

Oh I see, only toffs are allowed double-barrelled names, because who would be proud of their poor heritage? 

 

Fuck off. 

[AngryOfTuebrook]

On 08/10/2020 at 20:11, Bruce Spanner said:

Alphabetical order, I know, I’ve thought about this name, a lot! 

ZKG doesn't play by society's rules.

[Bruce Spanner]

1 hour ago, AngryofTuebrook said:

ZKG doesn't play by society's rules.

Just remember her name that way.

 

Zeb can do as Zeb does free the travails of us mere hoomans.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

1 minute ago, Bruce Spanner said:

Just remember her name that way.

 

Zeb can do as Zeb does free the travails of us mere hoomans.

True.  We've seen his shirts.

[alles ist gut]

19 hours ago, Dr Nowt said:

like a social cues version of Batfink’s wings being a shield of steel.

Batfink rep

[Karl_b]

Aren't a lot of double-barreled surnames reflective of both different family make-ups and fewer people taking their spouse's surname when getting married? To say it's pretentious or only for those with a 'legacy' is ridiculous. 

 

My wife has a double-barrelled surname because she didn't want to drop her family name but also wanted to reflect that her and I are a family. I wasn't bothered but that's what she chose.

 

Don't Spanish and Portuguese language countries have different customs when it comes to surnames and everyone is effectively double-barreled? It also deals with the inevitability of two people with double-barreled surnames have a child/wed and how that name changes?

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

The double barrelled thing doesn't really work beyond on generation though. What surname do children get with both parents having double barrelled name? Or a couple marrying, again already with double barrelled names.

[Evelyn Tentions]

 

23 minutes ago, Karl_b said:

Aren't a lot of double-barreled surnames reflective of both different family make-ups and fewer people taking their spouse's surname when getting married? To say it's pretentious or only for those with a 'legacy' is ridiculous. 

 

My wife has a double-barrelled surname because she didn't want to drop her family name but also wanted to reflect that her and I are a family. I wasn't bothered but that's what she chose.

 

Don't Spanish and Portuguese language countries have different customs when it comes to surnames and everyone is effectively double-barreled? It also deals with the inevitability of two people with double-barreled surnames have a child/wed and how that name changes?

In Spanish culture a child is named in the form mothers second name fathers second name. For example

A B C marries D E F.

She becomes D E F de C

Their children are G F C, H G C and  I G C

G F C is female

She grows up and marries X Y Z and becomes G F C de Z.

Their kid becomes M C Z.

H G C is male. He marries Q R  S. She is Q R S de C

 Their kid is W S C

It's always the males surname that carries forward.

 

Just to make things more complicated the de part is mostly used by the toffs

 

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

8 minutes ago, Evelyn Tentions said:

 

In Spanish culture a child is named in the form mothers second name fathers second name. For example

A B C marries D E F.

She becomes D E F de C

Their children are G F C, H G C and  I G C

G F C is female

She grows up and marries X Y Z and becomes G F C de Z.

Their kid becomes M C Z.

H G C is male. He marries Q R  S. She is Q R S de C

 Their kid is W S C

It's always the males surname that carries forward.

 

Just to make things more complicated the de part is mostly used by the toffs

 

 

[AngryOfTuebrook]

29 minutes ago, Evelyn Tentions said:

 

In Spanish culture a child is named in the form mothers second name fathers second name. For example

A B C marries D E F.

She becomes D E F de C

Their children are G F C, H G C and  I G C

G F C is female

She grows up and marries X Y Z and becomes G F C de Z.

Their kid becomes M C Z.

H G C is male. He marries Q R  S. She is Q R S de C

 Their kid is W S C

It's always the males surname that carries forward.

 

Just to make things more complicated the de part is mostly used by the toffs

 

Guessing people's passwords is piss easy in Spain.

[Shitty Arse]

Riding a bike with no hands on the handlebars 

[Geoff Woade]

5 minutes ago, Soft Joe said:

Riding a bike with no hands on the handlebars 

It’s one of life’s great mysteries why junkies who can’t even walk straight can always seem to ride a bike with no hands.

[manwiththestick]

27 minutes ago, Soft Joe said:

Riding a bike with no hands on the handlebars 

Or doing wheelies in the middle of the road. Great, you can wheelie your bike, so can I but I'll do it in the hills not outside the co-op.

[lifetime fan]

On 11/10/2020 at 17:16, Colonel Kurtz said:

Oh I’m not sure. There’s a certain pleasure in owning an old prestige car that you paid less than 10% of the book price for. A lot more interesting than driving a brand new 15k Kia. People are obsessed with mileage as well, mines got 171,000 on the clock but as long as you keep changing the oil, it will do another 50,000 easily. Better to buy a decent car with high motorway mileage than some cheap shit that’s only ever been driven around town by a granny wearing out the brakes, clutch, suspension etc. 

We had a fairly early edition (Y reg) focus that was past around between family members for years. 
 

It finally died when my brother had it with 200k plus miles on the clock. 

[Section_31]

Anyone who drives under 20mph. The coppers pull you over for that because they assume you're up to no good. There's just no excuse for it unless you're kerb crawling and have really bad eyes.

[sir roger]

5 hours ago, Karl_b said:

Don't Spanish and Portuguese language countries have different customs when it comes to surnames and everyone is effectively double-barreled? It also deals with the inevitability of two people with double-barreled surnames have a child/wed and how that name changes?

I have been calling out  ' Bobby fuck-off ' at a Portuguese speaking guy I know for a while now.

[Bjornebye]

6 hours ago, Geoff Woade said:

It’s one of life’s great mysteries why junkies who can’t even walk straight can always seem to ride a bike with no hands.

Hahaha and they rush everywhere as well. Always on the go 

[easytoslip]

With the obligatory can in hand and minty grey trackie bottoms. 

[Jairzinho]

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change.org/BanSharia2020

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If you were doing a cunt checklist...

[Harry Squatter]

Anyone who has tons of Union Jacks plastered on their Twatter profile. 

 

You can guarantee they are a Tory, Brexiteer, World War 2 nostaligist, racist, hates snowflakes, tells it how it is, sexist, homophobe who dislikes anyone who disagrees with them. 

[easytoslip]

14 minutes ago, Doctor Troy said:

Anyone who has tons of Union Jacks plastered on their Twatter profile. 

 

You can guarantee they are a Tory, Brexiteer, World War 2 nostaligist, racist, hates snowflakes, tells it how it is, sexist, homophobe who dislikes anyone who disagrees with them. 

I agree, but doesn't the same apply to extreme left wingers and their intolerance to those that disagree with them? 

[Bjornebye]

18 minutes ago, easytoslip said:

I agree, but doesn't the same apply to extreme left wingers and their intolerance to those that disagree with them? 

No because the left aren't usually vile racist scumbags. 

[easytoslip]

15 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

No because the left aren't usually vile racist scumbags. 

There it is, usually? So some might be then? 

I know quite a few right wingers that are certainly not racist, there coloured too, I also know a staunch Labour lad at home who was pissed off at Starmer for taking the knee so I wouldn't know. 

Arseholes on both sides, such is human nature. I'd love a dollar for every time I read the word racist.

[Bjornebye]

6 minutes ago, easytoslip said:

There it is, usually? So some might be then? 

I know quite a few right wingers that are certainly not racist, there coloured too, I also know a staunch Labour lad at home who was pissed off at Starmer for taking the knee so I wouldn't know. 

Arseholes on both sides, such is human nature. I'd love a dollar for every time I read the word racist.

I love how you are dismissing a generalisation after making one yourself.