Office Christmas parties

[macc]

What was the scenario for probable rape? How did you stop it?

 

Are you trying to find out if he saw your face or recognised you?

[RJ Fan club]

I've got two this week.

 

Wednesday is the big departmental lunch and piss up. It's in my old local, so I'll probably have a few, then head into town with some good people.

 

Friday should be boss. It's our team drinks. Two mates who have been off on maternity leave are back and out. Our interim manager is leaving on Thursday. Hence hastily organised the day after to make sure she doesn't attend. We're hitting the pub for Black eye Friday, 4 pm, gonna get battered. Everyone is just relieved to be back to normal.

[Red Banjo]

Most of the birds I work with are fit and are either at uni, finished uni or about to start uni.

 

So fit and not stupid. It's paradise.

 

Really? Some of the dumbest people i've ever met have been to uni. You seem to infer that stupid people avoid it.

 

Being able to afford further education is hardly a measure of intelligence.

[Liverpool lad]

 

Really? Some of the dumbest people i've ever met have been to uni. You seem to infer that stupid people avoid it.

 

Being able to afford further education is hardly a measure of intelligence.

 

I used to work with students, some of the thickest cunts I have met

[Joe Le Taxi]

Really? Some of the dumbest people i've ever met have been to uni. You seem to infer that stupid people avoid it.

 

Being able to afford further education is hardly a measure of intelligence.

 

These don't do spastic courses though.

 

For example one is studying Arabic and another has left for a year to teach English in South Korea.

 

Saying that I know some proper retarded students so I do agree with what you're saying.

[Unrighteous]

The girls that I met in Uni were pretty fucking stupid, and I even mean students at the law school and shit.

[Liverpool lad]

Taught to pass exams, not to think

[TheBitch]

More importantly, how did Remmie save a girls life?

[Rico1304]

We've got ours in Leeds today, looking forward to it. Early dart, followed by a Thai curry and then on the lash. Hopefully will be messy.

[Chairman Meow]

So Lewis had a drunken woman who said she wanted to have sex with him but instead he went for a taxi and got the taxi drivers number?

[Remmie]

More importantly, how did Remmie save a girls life?

Vang Vieng. Tubing. For those who dont know what it is see this:

 

[YOUTUBE]iq5LlHuxQJM[/YOUTUBE]

 

Japanese girl, who just happens to be in the room next to me at the hotel is as drunk as fuck further down the course when bars and stop off points start getting to be pretty far apart 20-30 minutes maybe and seeing others on the river every 10 minutes or so. I had lost my friends about 45 minutes earlier just drifting at different speeds. The water is flowing faster and varies in depth a bit.

 

I see Miho just fallen out of her tube and swimming after her bucket rather than her tube, badly like a small child learning to swim in some reasonably fast currents. I'm a pretty good swimmer so recovered her tube, her and even her bucket and get her back on it. She is hammered drunk and constantly taking to me in Japanese, so I decide to stay with her and help her on shore at the next possible opportunity.

 

2-3 hours later in the pitch black and she's fallen off about another 5 or 6 times trying to kiss me amongst other things and we finally get to dry land at a stop off spot with a tuk-tuk kindly waiting, someone had seen us maybe 20 minutes earlier.

 

She wouldn't necessarily have definitely died as someone else may have found her in time but she was in a pretty bad way, out of control, just lost her tube and panicking.

 

Talking to me constantly in Japanese seemed to be an unrelenting trait throughout the rest of the night including when I smashed it to within an inch of her life, twice. How do you find sexual etiquette with someone with no common language?

[Unrighteous]

Vang Vieng. Tubing. For those who dont know what it is see this:

 

[YOUTUBE]iq5LlHuxQJM[/YOUTUBE]

 

Japanese girl, who just happens to be in the room next to me at the hotel is as drunk as fuck further down the course when bars and stop off points start getting to be pretty far apart 20-30 minutes maybe and seeing others on the river every 10 minutes or so. I had lost my friends about 45 minutes earlier just drifting at different speeds. The water is flowing faster and varies in depth a bit.

 

I see Miho just fallen out of her tube and swimming after her bucket rather than her tube, badly like a small child learning to swim in some reasonably fast currents. I'm a pretty good swimmer so recovered her tube, her and even her bucket and get her back on it. She is hammered drunk and constantly taking to me in Japanese, so I decide to stay with her and help her on shore at the next possible opportunity.

 

2-3 hours later in the pitch black and she's fallen off about another 5 or 6 times trying to kiss me amongst other things and we finally get to dry land at a stop off spot with a tuk-tuk kindly waiting, someone had seen us maybe 20 minutes earlier.

 

She wouldn't necessarily have definitely died as someone else may have found her in time but she was in a pretty bad way, out of control, just lost her tube and panicking.

 

Talking to me constantly in Japanese seemed to be an unrelenting trait throughout the rest of the night including when I smashed it to within an inch of her life, twice. How do you find sexual etiquette with someone with no common language?

 

 

... Have you learned nothing since you joined here, Zeb? Pat her fanny and whisper, "Awooga."

[Joe Le Taxi]

So Lewis had a drunken woman who said she wanted to have sex with him but instead he went for a taxi and got the taxi drivers number?

 

A girl on the verge of unconsciousness, yes.

 

The same lad who was with me who knew her is having his 21st on Thursday and she will be out and he has told her about me.

 

I hope...

[llego]

Lewis, no offense but youre in a bit of a scummy phase. Hope you grow out of it soon.

[Joe Le Taxi]

So I should have raped her?

[Chairman Meow]

Actually went to the Friday one last week. One of the last two standing which caught me by surprise as I'm a serious lightweight these days. I'm not tee total but anything more than one or two pints is a rarity. First works nights out I've done other than the people I would ordinarily choose to have a night out with in years. One thing that hasn't changed is the ones who make a big deal of how much they can take their drink are always the ones who end up a fucked up mess because they clearly can't actually handle it.

 

I conducted my conversation in a manner befitting the GF with casual regard for womanhood and variants of any GF stories and comments. It was more than a bit rapey.

 

Didn't do the Saturday as I had a bad head and was more interested in getting my new computer up and running.

 

Lewis you said she told you she wanted to have sex with you. Surely if she says she wants to fuck you it's not rape?

[Duncan Clench]

At the very least Lewis stopped a French guy getting laid. He deserves credit for that surely?!

[Kevin D]

Actually went to the Friday one last week. One of the last two standing which caught me by surprise as I'm a serious lightweight these days. I'm not tee total but anything more than one or two pints is a rarity. First works nights out I've done other than the people I would ordinarily choose to have a night out with in years. One thing that hasn't changed is the ones who make a big deal of how much they can take their drink are always the ones who end up a fucked up mess because they clearly can't actually handle it.

 

I conducted my conversation in a manner befitting the GF with casual regard for womanhood and variants of any GF stories and comments. It was more than a bit rapey.

 

Didn't do the Saturday as I had a bad head and was more interested in getting my new computer up and running.

 

Lewis you said she told you she wanted to have sex with you. Surely if she says she wants to fuck you it's not rape?

 

I've always found it odd how common a boast this is among people in this country, especially since, generally speaking, people feel uncomfortable talking themselves up here.

[Joe Le Taxi]

Actually went to the Friday one last week. One of the last two standing which caught me by surprise as I'm a serious lightweight these days. I'm not tee total but anything more than one or two pints is a rarity. First works nights out I've done other than the people I would ordinarily choose to have a night out with in years. One thing that hasn't changed is the ones who make a big deal of how much they can take their drink are always the ones who end up a fucked up mess because they clearly can't actually handle it.

 

I conducted my conversation in a manner befitting the GF with casual regard for womanhood and variants of any GF stories and comments. It was more than a bit rapey.

 

Didn't do the Saturday as I had a bad head and was more interested in getting my new computer up and running.

 

Lewis you said she told you she wanted to have sex with you. Surely if she says she wants to fuck you it's not rape?

 

Right before this she said she lived on "fuckity fuck street". She was in no fit state and even though she kept saying she wanted to fuck me and kept biting my cheek I applied the most self control I've ever used.

 

The same lad who knew her is celebrating his 21st tonight so if she is out I will remind her of how I helped her and hopefully be like a rat up a drainpipe.

[odris]

Right before this she said she lived on "fuckity fuck street". She was in no fit state and even though she kept saying she wanted to fuck me and kept biting my cheek I applied the most self control I've ever used.

 

The same lad who knew her is celebrating his 21st tonight so if she is out I will remind her of how I helped her and hopefully be like a rat up a drainpipe.

 

That's dirty talk, Lewis. You're a let down.

[Unrighteous]

So I should have raped her?

 

It's not rape if you don't cum inside her. Duh

[llego]

Hope you all realize just how impressionable this kid is! Youre playing with fire...

[lifetime fan]

How'd it go Lewis?

[TheBitch]

Someone rep Remmie please, ta.

[Remmie]

Someone rep Remmie please, ta.

Let's hear about your bumming etiquette with non-English speakers? I found doing whatever the hell I wanted seemed to go down well.