Office Christmas parties

[Fowlers God]

I smashed a girl I used to work with. She is now my girlfriend so be careful out there

 

I've done worse, I've married the girl that used to sit next to me and make formal comnplaints about me.

 

Yeah xmas do's are a no no for me. Let's go out and talk about work. Work the place I HAVE to go to every day. I've only just started at my new company and was met with one bitter girl who complained for 3 weeks that the xmas fund provided by the company was being replaced by a xmas gift. A bottle of wine, 2 different cheese and some crackers in a nice presentation box. Ill take that over a xmas do every day of the week.

 

Most of the work force are going out for a curry but as money is tight then if there is anyspare then I shall be enjoying the money with my mates drinking not with a bunch of people taking work to the pub with them.

 

Last xmas party I went to anyway I ended up in the bogs with the boss's wife doing coke. Not big or clever any more.

[Joe Le Taxi]

I'll probably go to a strip club with my boss.

[Fowlers God]

I'll probably go to a strip club with my boss.

 

What's his number ill make sure he doesn't get a cab home with you.

[Joe Le Taxi]

I work with loads of fit girls, the odds of me being molested and not enjoying it are slim.

[rEddie]

I didn't smash a bird at my Xmas party last night but I did kiss one and it's a minor problem as we're both in relationships. Me 7 years' date=' her 5 years. If this was a totally random act then I wouldn't care as much (although I am uncomfortable with any act of unfaithfulness). However it's not, there's definitely an attraction there. Now we're going to see each other every day at work just to complicate it further. She's a lovely girl, we get on very well and she's not bad looking but not gorgeous either. I've never really thought of her like that previously. Nothing can come of this, right? The occassional serious answer would be appreciated!![/quote']

 

If this is going to consume you with guilt, go give her one up the wrong 'un and at least have something to justify the guilt. Go on, you know it makes sense.

[brucespanner]

I'm going to goose anything with a pulse.

 

Fucking love the awkward morning/week after, plus I work with some fit women, they get pissed, tell me they've always had a thing for me.

 

*hic* 'oh, there's some mistletoe..fancy a christmas kiss Bruce?'

 

'Taxi'

 

v

v

v

v

v

 

They get bummed.

 

Fin.

[brucespanner]

.

Edited December 12, 2012 by brucespanner
double post cunts!!!

[brucespanner]

Fao CD

 

Slight problem about pulling on the works Christmas shindig is that gag girl is coming to London on the Saturday afternoon, so if I do take advantage of pissed up women, which lets face it, I will, then I have to be ready for round two later in the day.

 

Love my life.

[Joe Le Taxi]

You are a class act that we should all look to follow.

[Carvalho Diablo]

Fao CD

 

Slight problem about pulling on the works Christmas shindig is that gag girl is coming to London on the Saturday afternoon, so if I do take advantage of pissed up women, which lets face it, I will, then I have to be ready for round two later in the day.

 

Love my life.

 

You are a class act that we should all look to follow.

 

Always wear your PVC wipe me down kecks then Lewis.

[Paulie Dangerously]

I work with loads of fit girls, the odds of me being molested and not enjoying it are slim.

 

Negged for not being down trodden by the weight of working life. Also for being young.

[Captain]

I swerved it this year as well. Went on a cabin trip instead.

[Joe Le Taxi]

Negged for not being down trodden by the weight of working life. Also for being young.

 

I am fucking fantastic.

 

I'm a student as well so I can do fuck all for a few years apart from get pissed.

[Guest San Don]

I'm self employed so will be photoshopping a bill for myself and my company secretary to the tune of the maximum amount allowable by HMRC for a Christmas Party. I think its £125 a head.

 

£150 each and not a penny more else you'll be liable for tax.

[Carradona]

Lad in work has been given the nickname Olly (the Octopus) because he was grabbing all round him at the Christmas party. They also call him Jimmy because he was grabbing girls who are considerably younger than he is. He is oblivious as to what both nicknames mean.

[Joe Le Taxi]

I have the octopus nickname as well.

[RedKnight]

Because you squirt your 'oil' over people? Or is that a squid?

[Liverpool lad]

I still maintain that they are best avoided

[RedKnight]

Is there a difference between a squid and a octopus?

[RedKnight]

Google says there is.

[Redder Lurtz]

I'll probably go to a strip club with my boss.

 

Takes all sorts I suppose. What do you normally charge him for that Lewis?

[Remmie]

Managed to talk a younger girl at work into going, not sure what the etiquette is as we will just meet there. I'll probably make a badly advised drunken move and get rejected. Win!

[brucespanner]

Splash o' Brut and I'm good to go!

 

I've got my wingwomen in tow to make sure I make a complete tit of myself, she acts as my wayward moral compass!

 

I've already drunk the best part of a bottle of Zubrowka, this may get messy!

 

Tally-ho chaps.

[Rex Banner]

Had a great Department of Planning party last night, we had our secret Santa at 10:30am and the Champagne was out so the drinking started early. Then my section had our Christmas lunch at a pub where the drinking ensued for the bravest all the way to 5pm. That's when we headed over to the Department Party started at an even better pub with a ton of great food and a bar tab that lasted through to 12am which was insane because I personally drank a lot of moneys worth and so did most others.

Met a lot of cool hot girls that work on other floors and I'm pretty sure I didn't do anything embarrassing and was at that magical loose and funny stage of drunkenness rather than the too drunk and embarrassing level so I've laid some good ground work there.

Then the night finished with a bunch of us heading to this amazing Thai restaurant which was the perfect way to finish the night and help me wake up feeling good and not hung over at all.

 

Great fucking day and night, I work with a lot of awesome people and managers who like to have fun. Some of the older birds could handle their drunks too, I was impressed. This one Lady hung with us drinking pretty much from from 11am to 12am and was drinking shots and all, she was a hoot.

[brucespanner]

Splash o' Brut and I'm good to go!

 

I've got my wingwomen in tow to make sure I make a complete tit of myself, she acts as my wayward moral compass!

 

I've already drunk the best part of a bottle of Zubrowka, this may get messy!

 

Tally-ho chaps.

 

Portuguese, 29, scientist and fit, just left.

 

Scottish, 23, film maker and fit about to arrive!