Depression

[Guest]

I take it back, I've found a side effect.

 

I've had one can of San Miguel and I'm smashed. Fucking hell.

That sounds like a buy one get ten free offer to me.

[Oh Buoy]

Started writing some self-help books.

 

Note: If anyone is interested/knows someone who is interested in them, let me know and I'll give you a discount code for when they publish. 

 

Started the series with these: 

 

 

https://mettleguides.launchaco.com/

[Section_31]

Had a weird few days myself, don't know why. I'd been going to this psych for a while and was planning on stopping as I felt I'd said all I had to say, and he seemed pretty pleased with how I'd come on, but when I suggested stopping going he said it'd be good to have a couple more appointments but maybe spread out further. Later in the session I started feeling unwell, felt like I really needed a piss. The next day and ever since my guts have been really bad, I've had the shits a bit when I've been out places. I've been preoccupied over that and feel really down now, like I'm looking through a haze and can't concentrate. I think my fear of anxiety now is my main source of anxiety, and I'm hyper vigilant about the physical symptoms returning. 

[Bjornebye]

Had a weird few days myself, don't know why. I'd been going to this psych for a while and was planning on stopping as I felt I'd said all I had to say, and he seemed pretty pleased with how I'd come on, but when I suggested stopping going he said it'd be good to have a couple more appointments but maybe spread out further. Later in the session I started feeling unwell, felt like I really needed a piss. The next day and ever since my guts have been really bad, I've had the shits a bit when I've been out places. I've been preoccupied over that and feel really down now, like I'm looking through a haze and can't concentrate. I think my fear of anxiety now is my main source of anxiety, and I'm hyper vigilant about the physical symptoms returning.

Do you live in Liverpool mate? Wouldn't mind taking you for a pint of so. OK it might not help you feeling anxious but Liffey Sundays are boss.

[Captain Turdseye]

I love pharmaceuticals me, never understand why people are so quick to poo poo them. Whatever gets you on your feet again is alright by me.

You want to get yourself a neurological disease, mate. It’s great.

 

Heard about some meds you want to try? No problem, pick them up from from the chemist in half an hour. Fancy some strong painkillers? I’m sending the script over now, sir.

[Captain Turdseye]

Do you live in Liverpool mate? Wouldn't mind taking you for a pint of so. OK it might not help you feeling anxious but Liffey Sundays are boss.

I think Section lives in your neck of the woods.

 

That’s right. Widnes.

[Section_31]

Do you live in Liverpool mate? Wouldn't mind taking you for a pint of so. OK it might not help you feeling anxious but Liffey Sundays are boss.

 

Ha cheers I might take you up on that! 

 

To be honest I don't know what causes my anxiety and I don't think the psych does either, it's subconscious mainly so doing things to try and lift my mood or distract myself don't tend to work in my experience. I handle stress by burying it and just getting on with things. As time goes by it nibbles at me and I get annoyed easier, agitated, pissed off generally, and occasionally I pop and end up having to take a month off or whatever, then begin the long slow road back. 

[Bjornebye]

Ha cheers I might take you up on that!

 

To be honest I don't know what causes my anxiety and I don't think the psych does either, it's subconscious mainly so doing things to try and lift my mood or distract myself don't tend to work in my experience. I handle stress by burying it and just getting on with things. As time goes by it nibbles at me and I get annoyed easier, agitated, pissed off generally, and occasionally I pop and end up having to take a month off or whatever, then begin the long slow road back.

Anytime mate. Are you Widnes then ?

 

Yeah I know what you mean. I think I'm better but still have days where I could kill someone for rustling a crisp packet.

[Oh Buoy]

Ha cheers I might take you up on that! 

 

To be honest I don't know what causes my anxiety and I don't think the psych does either, it's subconscious mainly so doing things to try and lift my mood or distract myself don't tend to work in my experience. I handle stress by burying it and just getting on with things. As time goes by it nibbles at me and I get annoyed easier, agitated, pissed off generally, and occasionally I pop and end up having to take a month off or whatever, then begin the long slow road back. 

 

What do you feel it is, anxiety or stress? 

[Section_31]

What do you feel it is, anxiety or stress? 

 

I'm honestly not sure, stress perhaps? When I threw my last wobbler a couple of years back I had a phone consultation with someone from Talk Liverpool who was pretty sound and he said it was 'a different type of anxiety' to what I'd seen with some mates, i.e 'don't fancy going out today' etc. 

 

I never get those feelings, I never feel nervous, down etc as a lot of people I know do, I just get really powerful physical symptoms which then themselves bring stress. 

[Oh Buoy]

I'm honestly not sure, stress perhaps? When I threw my last wobbler a couple of years back I had a phone consultation with someone from Talk Liverpool who was pretty sound and he said it was 'a different type of anxiety' to what I'd seen with some mates, i.e 'don't fancy going out today' etc. 

 

I never get those feelings, I never feel nervous, down etc as a lot of people I know do, I just get really powerful physical symptoms which then themselves bring stress. 

 

You've mentioned this: 

 

I handle stress by burying it and just getting on with things. As time goes by it nibbles at me and I get annoyed easier, agitated, pissed off generally, and occasionally I pop and end up having to take a month off or whatever, then begin the long slow road back.

 

How many of the following resonate with you: 

 

Physical signs

 

 Headaches

 Muscle tension or pain

 Stomach problems

 Sweating

 Feeling dizzy

 Bowel or bladder problems

 Breathlessness or palpitations

 Dry mouth

 Tingling in body

 Sexual problems

 Tired all the time

 

Emotions

 

 Feeling irritable

 Feeling anxious or tense

 Feeling low

 Feeling lack of interest

 Feeling bad about yourself

 

Effects on what you do

 

 Temper outbursts

 Drinking or smoking too much

 Changes in eating habits

 Withdrawing from usual activities

 Becoming unreasonable

 Being forgetful or clumsy

 Rushing around

 Not sleeping

[Section_31]

 

You've mentioned this: 

 

 

How many of the following resonate with you: 

 

Physical signs

 

 Headaches

 Muscle tension or pain

 Stomach problems

 Sweating

 Feeling dizzy

 Bowel or bladder problems

 Breathlessness or palpitations

 Dry mouth

 Tingling in body

 Sexual problems

 Tired all the time

 

Emotions

 

 Feeling irritable

 Feeling anxious or tense

 Feeling low

 Feeling lack of interest

 Feeling bad about yourself

 

Effects on what you do

 

 Temper outbursts

 Drinking or smoking too much

 Changes in eating habits

 Withdrawing from usual activities

 Becoming unreasonable

 Being forgetful or clumsy

 Rushing around

 Not sleeping

 

 

I'd say five from the top, maybe between two and four from the middle depending on what's going on at the time, and one from the last one 

[Oh Buoy]

I'd say five from the top, maybe between two and four from the middle depending on what's going on at the time, and one from the last one 

 

And this one: 

 

How you feel

 Anxious, nervous, worried, frightened 

 Feeling something dreadful is going to happen 

 Tense, stressed, uptight, on edge, unsettled 

 Unreal, strange, woozy, detached, panicky 

 

How you think

 Constant worrying

 Can’t concentrate

 Thoughts racing

 Mind jumping from one thing to another

 Imagining the worst and dwelling on it

 

Common thoughts

 “I’mlosingcontrol”

 “I’m cracking up”

 “I’m going to faint”

 “My legs are going to collapse” 

 “I’m going to have a heart attack” 

 “I’m going to make a fool of myself” 

 “I can’t cope” 

 “I’ve got to get out” 

 

What happens to your body

 Heart pounds, races, skips a beat 

 Chest feels tight or painful 

 Tingling or numbness in toes or fingers 

 Stomach churning or butterflies 

 Having to go to the toilet 

 Feeling jumpy or restless 

 Tense muscles 

 Body aching 

 Sweating 

 Breathing changes 

 Dizzy, light headed 

 

What you do

•   Pace up and down 

•   Start jobs and not finish 

•   Can’t sit and relax 

•   On the go all of the time 

•   Talk quickly or more than usual 

•   Snappy and irritable behaviour 

•   Drink more alcohol 

•   Smoke more 

•   Eat more (or less) 

•   Avoid feared situations 

[Section_31]

With the thoughts and feelings one, I only get those when i 'pop', I've had two anxiety breakdowns and when I did I had all of those feelings, inabillity to concentrate, racing thoughts, fearing the worst etc. I don't have them most of the time and I never feel I'm having a heart attack or anything (even when I've had panic attacks I knew what they were, and didn't 'panic' about them, I just tried to chill then went home and went to bed. 

 

The physical stuff is a big one for me  though, I get most of those above, the guts is by far the biggest and most common one though, my guts are always either bad, or I'm worrying about them being bad if I'm out. I fidget a lot - always on my phone even when trying to watch the telly, distracting myself etc.  I never 'really' relax, I feel like I've got a duty all the time to do things for people, so if I go on holiday with the Mrs I'll feel a responsibilty to make sure she's having a good time, rather than me. 

[Oh Buoy]

I never 'really' relax, I feel like I've got a duty all the time to do things for people, so if I go on holiday with the Mrs I'll feel a responsibilty to make sure she's having a good time, rather than me. 

 

This is what threw it for me. I've worked with this before (almost word for word there). 

 

If you could put a percentage of how much time you dedicate to the following, what would it be: 

 

- Spending time with family and loved ones (seeing them, doing chores, helping out etc)

- Spending times at work (e.g. assigned hours, overtime, checking your emails at home etc) 

- Spending time being social (e.g. with friends, doing hobbies etc) 

- Spending time on your health and fitness (e.g. eating well, going the gym, walks etc)

- Spending time on self-development/self-care (e.g. planning stuff that matters to you; holidays, reading about things you're interested in)

[Section_31]

This is what threw it for me. I've worked with this before (almost word for word there). 

 

If you could put a percentage of how much time you dedicate to the following, what would it be: 

 

- Spending time with family and loved ones (seeing them, doing chores, helping out etc) - 20%

- Spending times at work (e.g. assigned hours, overtime, checking your emails at home etc) - 50% 

- Spending time being social (e.g. with friends, doing hobbies etc)  - 10%

- Spending time on your health and fitness (e.g. eating well, going the gym, walks etc) - 15%

- Spending time on self-development/self-care (e.g. planning stuff that matters to you; holidays, reading about things you're interested in) - 5%

 

 

I'd say the health percentage is fairly recent, it was probably closer to 2% up until a few weeks ago. I like seeing mates but don't do it as often as I did, maybe monthly now. My Mrs is a teacher so basically I live her lifestyle, I go to work, we have tea then she goes upstairs to do her work all night, we don't go out in the week at all. I  usually amuse myself of an evening on here or with the telly on, but not really watching it. 

 

It has occurred to me that I do need to find more 'me' time and relax, but that feels tough in a sense in that I don't actually enjoy much. I'm trying to find some hobbies at the moment actually. Also, I've always been like this and it never used to give me meltdowns. 

[Oh Buoy]

I'd say the health percentage is fairly recent, it was probably closer to 2% up until a few weeks ago. I like seeing mates but don't do it as often as I did, maybe monthly now. My Mrs is a teacher so basically I live her lifestyle, I go to work, we have tea then she goes upstairs to do her work all night, we don't go out in the week at all. I  usually amuse myself of an evening on here or with the telly on, but not really watching it. 

 

It has occurred to me that I do need to find more 'me' time and relax, but that feels tough in a sense in that I don't actually enjoy much. I'm trying to find some hobbies at the moment actually. Also, I've always been like this and it never used to give me meltdowns. 

 

- Spending time with family and loved ones (seeing them, doing chores, helping out etc) - 20%

- Spending times at work (e.g. assigned hours, overtime, checking your emails at home etc) - 50% 

- Spending time being social (e.g. with friends, doing hobbies etc)  - 10%

- Spending time on your health and fitness (e.g. eating well, going the gym, walks etc) - 15%

- Spending time on self-development/self-care (e.g. planning stuff that matters to you; holidays, reading about things you're interested in) - 5%

 

So, at the moment, you're spending 70% doing the things you have to do (financial/family commitments), and 30% doing the things (the rest) you want to do (which has increase of late as you noted). To reduce stress, we place all these on a pie chart to see where we're investing a lot of our time but really, we're look at the simple ratio of must:want. 

 

The thing we tend to find is 'must' becomes concrete when it's actually as flexible as you want it to be. Ideally, you're wanting a 50:50 balance but that could be 40:60 depending of your choice of lifestyle and what's going on (e.g. family might be more if you are caring for your mother or someone). 

 

What I'd guess for you to do would be to look at the last three and see how you can improve them from 30% to 40%. 

 

A simple task may be to tell the Mrs that after work (before tea) you're going to commit 1 night a week to go for a short walk and talk about how your weeks been, what's going on, what you're stressed about. Share some time together and really make this time valuable. 

 

That will add some % to your self-care as you'll be checking in with one another and working through your problems together. 

[Section_31]

 

- Spending time with family and loved ones (seeing them, doing chores, helping out etc) - 20%

- Spending times at work (e.g. assigned hours, overtime, checking your emails at home etc) - 50% 

- Spending time being social (e.g. with friends, doing hobbies etc)  - 10%

- Spending time on your health and fitness (e.g. eating well, going the gym, walks etc) - 15%

- Spending time on self-development/self-care (e.g. planning stuff that matters to you; holidays, reading about things you're interested in) - 5%

 

So, at the moment, you're spending 70% doing the things you have to do (financial/family commitments), and 30% doing the things (the rest) you want to do (which has increase of late as you noted). To reduce stress, we place all these on a pie chart to see where we're investing a lot of our time but really, we're look at the simple ratio of must:want. 

 

The thing we tend to find is 'must' becomes concrete when it's actually as flexible as you want it to be. Ideally, you're wanting a 50:50 balance but that could be 40:60 depending of your choice of lifestyle and what's going on (e.g. family might be more if you are caring for your mother or someone). 

 

What I'd guess for you to do would be to look at the last three and see how you can improve them from 30% to 40%. 

 

A simple task may be to tell the Mrs that after work (before tea) you're going to commit 1 night a week to go for a short walk and talk about how your weeks been, what's going on, what you're stressed about. Share some time together and really make this time valuable. 

 

That will add some % to your self-care as you'll be checking in with one another and working through your problems together. 

 

 

Awesome stuff mate cheers for that. It's funny, but the only time I've ever really relaxed is when I was recovering from my anxiety breaks. I'd play my PS4, watch films, try and get out and do stuff (even though it was very uncomfortable at first) but my default is to not do that. 

 

I'm just genuinely surprised that not doing things like this can cause you so much problems. I do actually like my job these days and my life is pretty sound compared to many.

[Oh Buoy]

Awesome stuff mate cheers for that. It's funny, but the only time I've ever really relaxed is when I was recovering from my anxiety breaks. I'd play my PS4, watch films, try and get out and do stuff (even though it was very uncomfortable at first) but my default is to not do that. 

 

I'm just genuinely surprised that not doing things like this can cause you so much problems. I do actually like my job these days and my life is pretty sound compared to many.

 

Basics of self-care mate. 

 

I'd spend some time thinking about the above (what you can do/what you can reduce) and plan it into your calendar for next week and the week after that.

 

Then come back and see if there's any change to your mood. We can run through it each week if it helps.  

[Hades]

With years of meditation I've got most of the emotional symptoms under control. Psychomotor retardation is still an issue though. I'm hoping something comes of this new ketamine treatment.

[Section_31]

Anyone had any joy with any apps? I was enjoying one called unwinding anxiety but on lesson five it starts charging you, which ironically made me a bit depressed.

[General Dryness]

I'm fucking sick of it. Chucking pills down my neck every day, but not to feel happy. Nope, just slightly less crushed by despair.

 

Its never going to get better. Its not fucking fair.

[Fowlers God]

I'm fucking sick of it. Chucking pills down my neck every day, but not to feel happy. Nope, just slightly less crushed by despair.

 

Its never going to get better. Its not fucking fair.

Yeah it actually does. I decided to stop taking my tablets and although my anxiety sometimes is higher than normal I feel really fucking good atm.

 

Keep going and keep talking. It’s the shutting out feelings that doesn’t help

[KMD7]

I'm fucking sick of it. Chucking pills down my neck every day, but not to feel happy. Nope, just slightly less crushed by despair.

 

Its never going to get better. Its not fucking fair.

 

Keep strong fella.  Go to your GP and chat to them. We're all here for you. X

 

If you need a good laugh go to the breakfast thread

[General Dryness]

Cheers lads. A brief rail at the world, feeling a bit more chilled now.