Stan Collymores End Of Year Awards

[23_Carra_Gold]

I know we give him alot of attention but fuck me, he's outdone himself this time! Guess who he picked as his 'Worst Team of 2009', go on, guess...

 

As the nation’s most popular columnist I thought I should dish out some brickbats and bouquets for 2009 and make a few predictions from my crystal ball for 2010...

 

Worst managerial decision of the season: Rafa Benitez playing Aurelio and Lucas in Liverpool’s midfield in the Champions League.

 

Best managerial decision of the year: Aston Villa’s Martin O’Neill buying the defensive trio of James Collins, Richard Dunne and Stephen Warnock.

 

Player of 2009: James Milner. The Villa midfielder has gone from the England Under-21s to knocking on England’s World Cup starting XI.

 

Worst player of 2009: Robinho. If I was at Man City I would snap the hand off anyone offering £32million, which the Eastlands club ridiculously paid, for the mercurial Brazilian.

 

Manager of 2009: Roy Hodgson. The Fulham boss has enjoyed a brilliant year after guiding the club to seventh last term and keeping them up there this season.

 

Worst manager of 2009: Rafa Benitez. His poor buys and tactical decisions have cost Liverpool dearly.

 

Best team of 2009: Arsenal. They're playing fantastic football and are a joy to watch.

 

Worst team of 2009: Liverpool. My old club are sadly under-achieving massively.

 

Shock of the year: The debacle at Newcastle as they went from a Premier League big club to Championship outfit.

 

Goal of the year: Maynor Figueroa. The Wigan star showed wonderful technique for his goal against Stoke from near the halfway line.

 

Quote of the year: Rafa’s Rant. The Liverpool boss really lost the plot with his tirade against Sir Alex Ferguson last season.

 

Predictions for 2010...

 

1) Manchester United, Chelsea, Arsenal and Liverpool to finish in the top four.

 

2) One of the currently safe looking trio of Burnley, Wigan or Bolton to get relegated.

 

3) Cardiff City to get promotion.

 

4) Stewart Downing to gatecrash England’s World Cup squad along with Michael Owen.

 

5) England to get to World Cup semi-finals but no further.

 

6) Spain to win the World Cup on the back of their success at Euro 2008.

 

7) Chelsea to get to the Champions League final, but lose to Real Madrid or Barcelona.

 

8) One of either David Villa or Franck Ribery to come to the Premier League in the summer.

 

What a thick, thick cunt.

[lifetime fan]

Did 2009 start in August?

[Brownie]

Fucking hell, he hates us doesn't he?

[Joe Le Taxi]

What a cunt.

[Ezekiel 25:17]

I must have missed something, it seems all on the money to me.

[ngogswilly]

I hope stan plows his car into a wall the cunt.

[Bust3rboi]

hahaha wow he really hates rafa

[Guest the boy]

I must have missed something, it seems all on the money to me.

 

and you're as thick as he is.

 

 

Putting aside his comments about us ('worse team of 2009' with 86 points and a Champions League Quarter Final having beaten Madrid 5-0...), Milner as 'player of 2009' is most bizarre.

[piscinin]

He's Chris Bascombe without the TLW fan club. That's all.

[rargh]

Yeah 'cos the worst team of the year usually finishes second in the league with 86 points after taking 6 points each from Man U and Chelsea, and also reaching the quarters of the CL, beating Real Madrid 5-0 on aggregate along the way. Terrible results, those! The part of that ridiculous article that I agree with is giving Woy Hodgson manager of the year. Did the "Big club" of Newcastle being RELEGATED slip under his radar?

 

Carparks. Wanking. Hitting women.

[2pak]

I must have missed something, it seems all on the money to me.

 

You cant say that on a hate thread Jules.

[Guest Ulysses Everett McGill]

He should stick to beating women up

[Catch22]

and you're as thick as he is.

 

 

Putting aside his comments about us ('worse team of 2009' with 86 points and a Champions League Quarter Final having beaten Madrid 5-0...), Milner as 'player of 2009' is most bizarre.

 

 

Best winger who isn't good enough to get a big money-move to La Liga?

 

Even then, surely Malouda or one of Arse's many attacking widemen should be the receipient.......

[Hermes]

Fucking hell, he hates us doesn't he?

 

He's got us to finish in the top 4 though, I don't think we'll make it.

[FortressAnfield]

We are shit at the moment, but 'worst team'? 'Most under-performing CLUB' maybe.

 

I was about to say Portsmouth were worse than we are, then thought better of it. Then I looked at the fourth division (or 'League Two', as it is quaintly, and bizarrely, called nowadays), and saw Darlington adrift by 9 points at the bottom.

 

There are a few worse teams than us - quite a lot in fact - Stan, you twat. Darlington, Debrecen, most of the teams you played for, the Blueshite....

 

And if we're the 'worst' team, what about the other 88 you predict will finish below us?

 

Wanker as a player, and wanker as a pundit.

 

Oh, and Burnley look far from 'safe'. And Bolton don't look 'safe' at third from bottom. Haven't got a clue, have you?

[chris71]

Footballer,actor,pundit, manic depressive,dogging,woman beater....

Yup, i'm going to take a lot of notice of what he says.

[Catch22]

Concepts of under- or over- achievement compared to the financial budget of a club are too difficult for Stan's little brain.

 

Similar to explaining to a child you need to put in terms that he understands:

 

"Stan, when you have just been arrested for beating up a woman who is much smaller & weaker than you, the Police (the men in blue hats) start asking you nasty questions.

You then need a man in suit, called a lawyer, to help you out.

The amount you pay them ultimately ends up as their wages Stan.

If you spend a lot, you get a better man in a suit from a big shiny office in central London than if you spend a little, whereby he comes from your local Midlands high-street.

The more you spend, the more chance you get off & can do it again"

 

"Yes, Stan, it is the same if you are arrested for dogging"

[The 5th Benitel]

Concepts of under- or over- achievement compared to the financial budget of a club are too difficult for Stan's little brain.

 

 

Collymore is a cunt, and i wont pretend to know the ins and outs of each teams accounts, but i reckon by the halfway stage we shouldn't be closer on points to Wolves than we are to Chelsea.

[Red-Ed]

How can he slate us and particularly Rafa and at the same time say we will finish in the top four????

[Dan Vito Corleone]

"Currently safe looking Bolton"

 

They're in the bottom three you slobbering cunt!

[Ezekiel 25:17]

and you're as thick as he is.

 

 

Putting aside his comments about us ('worse team of 2009' with 86 points and a Champions League Quarter Final having beaten Madrid 5-0...), Milner as 'player of 2009' is most bizarre.

 

I was taking the piss, not sure what Collymore is trying to do anymore, it's deliberate goading of us despite feelings towards Rafa, it's Collymore though, his opinion is about as valued as mine.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

Did I read that right? Did Stanley Fucking Collymore just accuse someone else - anyone else - of under-achieving????

 

It's like irony was never invented.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

With regard to his other points - I've no problems with Hodgson as manager of the year, but I don't see how someone "knocking on England's World Cup starting XI" can be considered better than those who are considered dead-certs for the squad (plus any non-English players who are better than Milner).

[Faustus]

I can't get worked up by him because it's Stan bloody Collymore at the end of the day. I just can't take him seriously.

[Johnni]

The 'As the nation’s most popular columnist' was the bit that pissed me off so much. Always been and still is a cunt of the highest order.

I'm not the sort of person really to approach famous people in the street to ask for autographs/shake their hand etc but in his case i actually think if i saw him i would have a right go at him for all the shit he has done in his life cos his arrogance to me shows me he must have forgotten it all.