What constitutes the perfect cooked breakfast?

[Fugitive]

Just now, Bjornebye said:

 

Put a sock in it lad the snookers on. Keep ordering shit brekkies till you find your arc. 

You sound like an Evertonian.

[Bjornebye]

1 minute ago, Fugitive said:

You sound like an Evertonian.

 

You are an Evertonian. 

[Fugitive]

[Mook]

2 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

Celtic FC haven't. But, the club are acknowledging wrongdoings that happened. Unlike the other lot. 

 

I'm calling you a weasel because I think you're one. The only thing worse than a r*ngers fan is a closet one. 

 

I'm no closet Rangers fan, they're a shower of boot licking cunts who put stickers on Bill Shankly's statue, they can fuck right off & if they'd swept systematic child abuse under the carpet for decades then tried to avoid paying out when the victims started appearing then I'd be saying exactly the same thing about them.

 

This stuff is big news in Scotland, Stig & you don't have to be a Rangers supporter or a weasel to think it's a fucking disgrace. In fact I know Celtic supporters who are ashamed of the way their club have behaved & continue to behave over this.

[Mook]

As an aside, anyone who knows Glasgow, knows Govan is more of a Celtic area.

[Bjornebye]

18 minutes ago, Mook said:

 

I'm no closet Rangers fan, they're a shower of boot licking cunts who put stickers on Bill Shankly's statue, they can fuck right off & if they'd swept systematic child abuse under the carpet for decades then tried to avoid paying out when the victims started appearing then I'd be saying exactly the same thing about them.

 

This stuff is big news in Scotland, Stig & you don't have to be a Rangers supporter or a weasel to think it's a fucking disgrace. In fact I know Celtic supporters who are ashamed of the way their club have behaved & continue to behave over this.

 

Ok Mook. 

[Bjornebye]

13 minutes ago, Mook said:

As an aside, anyone who knows Glasgow, knows Govan is more of a Celtic area.

 

Ok Mook. 

[easytoslip]

9 hours ago, Fugitive said:

Someone call the bizzies, my eggs have definitely been raped!!!!

 

 

What could that possibly be? The lower egg looks like a disgruntled Praying Mantis with one eye if you look carefully. 

[Carradona]

Honestly, turning this thread into any sort of discussion about the Old Firm is a bannable offence.

 

There's a thread over on the FF for that tedious bollocks where the three posters on here who care about it can argue until they're blue and green in the face.

[Pidge]

Yeah, there are far bigger issues to worry about. Like the state of those fucking eggs!

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Did you order another breakfast instantly from the same place Fuge as you ended up rougher than before you ate the first one, maybe that's their niche.

[Bjornebye]

 

 

[Captain Turdseye]

Oh, this is bad. Real bad. It would have been bad enough but they forgot my black pudding and toast. Had to send her back to get them. 
 

 

 

 

 

Swapped out the hash browns for another frozen chippy sausage. I’m a big, beaner. I’m huge on beans, they’re fantastic. These ones weren’t though, they must have just blasted them in the microwave for 30 seconds, the dirty, lazy bastards. The bacon and black pudding were actually alright but the rest of it tasted like it looks. £7.50 for the breakfast. £2.30 for a medium glass of Sprite. £2.30. Cheeky fucking cunts. 

[Captain Turdseye]

I left no tip. It came to £9.80. I waited for the change from a tenner as a kind of protest. 

[Elite]

Very disturbing image. Instead of tracking down people watching illegal streams, the police should be cracking down on indecent images like that.

 

[YorkshireRed]

39 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

Oh, this is bad. Real bad. It would have been bad enough but they forgot my black pudding and toast. Had to send her back to get them. 
 

 

 

 

 

Swapped out the hash browns for another frozen chippy sausage. I’m a big, beaner. I’m huge on beans, they’re fantastic. These ones weren’t though, they must have just blasted them in the microwave for 30 seconds, the dirty, lazy bastards. The bacon and black pudding were actually alright but the rest of it tasted like it looks. £7.50 for the breakfast. £2.30 for a medium glass of Sprite. £2.30. Cheeky fucking cunts. 

The mushrooms look like rabbit droppings. A very sick rabbit. One that wouldn’t dream of eating this breakfast. 

[Bjornebye]

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Mook]

2 hours ago, Captain Turdseye said:

Oh, this is bad. Real bad. It would have been bad enough but they forgot my black pudding and toast. Had to send her back to get them. 
 

 

 

 

 

Swapped out the hash browns for another frozen chippy sausage. I’m a big, beaner. I’m huge on beans, they’re fantastic. These ones weren’t though, they must have just blasted them in the microwave for 30 seconds, the dirty, lazy bastards. The bacon and black pudding were actually alright but the rest of it tasted like it looks. £7.50 for the breakfast. £2.30 for a medium glass of Sprite. £2.30. Cheeky fucking cunts. 

 

Is this from the cafe they have in the Ninth Circle of Hell?

[Captain Turdseye]

It’s a shame that Fugitive has got ‘worst brekky of the year’ wrapped up already or I might have been in with an outside chance. 
 

Next time I go I’ll ask them to stick it in a foil tray. 

[Babb'sBurstNad]

Never seen the top of a toilet cistern used as a plate before.

[Chip Butty]

[Bob]

Stayed at Travelodge London City near Aldgate tube station last night.

 

a combination of a large curry and a few beers last night and a relatively early start this morning meant I didn’t want a proper breakkie so I settled for a bacon sarnie made from the breakfast buffet so got to see the fair on offer.

 

bacon was cracking. Well cooked and very tasty. 
 

the rest looked pretty awful to be honest.

 

the coffee was too hot to drink before I was done with my butty and had to leave.

[Jairzinho]

1 hour ago, Babb'sBurstNad said:

Never seen the top of a toilet cistern used as a plate before.

 

I think the photo was actually taken from the inside of the toilet.

[Jarvinja Ilnow]

Tods Cafe (no apostrophe), Mandurah.

 

24.90 Aud (everything is expensive here - aRdja would love it).

 

Toast - nicely done  though would probably fail the Lifey test.

Mushrooms - great. No garlic added (take note, Blue Marlin, you pseudos).

Scrambled eggs - perfectly cooked, not rubbery or sloppy like at Crowne Plaza.

Tomato - had more than a quickie with the frying pan. Sweetish in a natural way. Tony and his Ma would be impressed.

Chipolatas - very tasty, albeit small. Actual pork, not fucking chicken!

Hash Brown - they all taste the same. Crispy.

Bacon - the star of the show. Crispy rind but not dried out at all.

 

I'm saying this breakfast should not be injailnow - 9/10 minus 1 point for cost = 8/10.

 

Macchiato also good (4.20 Aud)

 

 

 

 

[Mudface]

What the fuck is that weird alien-looking honeycombed shit at the front?