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Family Strife


Section_31
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4 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

Yep. It's weird, society and maybe even genetics tells you family should be kept close, but sometimes your experiences are such that you have to fight that feeling. It can be hard, subconsciously even if not consciously, but sometimes you need to just cut that cord to literally survive. Blood isn't thicker than water. I learned that the hard way.

I'd push any of my family out of the way of an oncoming train and take the hit. Doesn't mean I'd be too arsed if I never spoke to most of them ever again. Not even a bad family really, just cranks. 

 

Bristol City just hit the bar, good game this. 

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8 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

Yep. It's weird, society and maybe even genetics tells you family should be kept close, but sometimes your experiences are such that you have to fight that feeling. It can be hard, subconsciously even if not consciously, but sometimes you need to just cut that cord to literally survive. Blood isn't thicker than water. I learned that the hard way.


I’m close to other family members that actually give a shit about me and mine, and whom I give a shit about also. My two sisters, a handful of first cousins and three uncles that I stay in touch with are basically all of ‘my side’ of the family. 
 

My bird’s ma is a proper cunt, but even factoring that in I can see that they’re all (her, her sisters, her dad) much more of a family unit than what I’ve ever known and I’m grateful to be a part of it, and to have that there for our kids as they’re growing up.  

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1 minute ago, Bjornebye said:

I bet thats what the mother in law writes in her xmas cards 


I have her on video pointing and looking straight at my phone saying the words “And you, John, you’re a CUNT for filming us” in her thick Geordie accent. It’s fucking hilarious. 
 

It was Christmas Day or Boxing Day years ago. Just me, her mum and her sister still up drinking in the early hours. 

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6 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:


I have her on video pointing and looking straight at my phone saying the words “And you, John, you’re a CUNT for filming us” in her thick Geordie accent. It’s fucking hilarious. 
 

It was Christmas Day or Boxing Day years ago. Just me, her mum and her sister still up drinking in the early hours. 

I remember calling an exes Scottish Auntie a cunt in her mums kitchen once but completely joking. More of a "hahaha says you you cunt" I was bladdered. Anyway the next day I get a full on bollocking, she got really offended by me calling her a cunt even though I wasn't in anyway being aggressive. 

 

A week later we went to see Billy Connolly in Southampton, she was with us and within 5 minutes he started going on about the word "Cunt" and how people shouldn't be offended by it. I was in fucking hysterics getting elbow digs to the rib off my bird and her mum, both trying not to laugh themselves while her auntie just sat staring at him fuming. 

 

Fuck them. 

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4 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

I remember calling an exes Scottish Auntie a cunt in her mums kitchen once but completely joking. More of a "hahaha says you you cunt" I was bladdered. Anyway the next day I get a full on bollocking, she got really offended by me calling her a cunt even though I wasn't in anyway being aggressive. 

 

A week later we went to see Billy Connolly in Southampton, she was with us and within 5 minutes he started going on about the word "Cunt" and how people shouldn't be offended by it. I was in fucking hysterics getting elbow digs to the rib off my bird and her mum, both trying not to laugh themselves while her auntie just sat staring at him fuming. 

 

Fuck them. 

Cunt is a term of endearment up here. 

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9 hours ago, Captain Turdseye said:

I’ve simply stopped speaking to my mum and dad. It’s much easier that way. They add nothing worthwhile to my life and I’m already thinking about the inevitable funeral costs that I’ll be landed with. 
 

To be fair to my ma, she texts on my birthday and Xmas day, but never on any of the kids birthdays or special days, etc. 

I've stopped speaking to my Dad,but only because he died 4 years ago!

Seriously though,it makes me glad my family is so 'well adjusted.'

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  • 1 month later...

It gets dafter. It was Her Indoors mums birthday so HI, her mum, sister (bints mum) and bint went for a pub lunch. I had offered to pay for it but as soon as I heard bint was on the usual scrounge just thought bollocks. She ruins things every time.

 

Bint of course paid for nothing. Anyway she 'works' for her boyfriend (wanker) at his printers in Epsom which I am pretty sure is going belly up.

 

This is the crap she comes out with: 'Oh, the accountant of wankers company has said I'm the best thing that has happened to the firm'. As if an accountant (if wanker even has one) would say that anyway.

 

What is she, a financial whizz kid, a major investor or what?

 

No. She answers the bloody phone.

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On 21/08/2022 at 11:38, Section_31 said:

Me mum went through a phase of shitting herself in public recently, including in my car while I was driving her for a brew. She went through loads of tests which showed no problems and she's now stopped. My uncle (her brother) is convinced she was doing it for attention.

 

Also recently found out from him that the fella she moved into our house when I was seven, who she'd met while he was in Wakefield high security nick, was questioned in our house by CID about the suspected rape and murder of an old woman.

 

My sister recently got her first ever job at the age of 27 as a cleaner. I was saying how proud I was of her and how this was the start of a new life, but she's quit already claiming sexual harassment (almost certainly a lie).

 

How's your family doing?

Update.

 

My sister did a day at the Co-Op then went back to this job where she reckoned she was being sexually harassed but is seemingly now very happy.

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  • 1 month later...

Fucking hell it’s hard work this life isn’t it?

 

After years of pussyfooting around after the end of my marriage trying to make decisions which would have the best chance of pacifying people and leaving calm waters, it’s blown up to this.

 

40 minutes of earache on the phone - dogs abuse at times - only not hanging up because I can’t not have my say back.

 

hundreds, probably thousands of words back in stream after stream of text after - each one more hurtful, vitriolic and vindictive than the last.

 

so that’s it. The end, the final drawn line in the sand, the full and final destruction of any remaining relationship with my dying ex-wife, with as yet untold impact on our daughter that will probably only come out in future costly counselling sessions, and all too late to save the best relationship I’ve ever had.

 

fuck it all.

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19 minutes ago, Bob Spunkmouse said:

Fucking hell it’s hard work this life isn’t it?

 

After years of pussyfooting around after the end of my marriage trying to make decisions which would have the best chance of pacifying people and leaving calm waters, it’s blown up to this.

 

40 minutes of earache on the phone - dogs abuse at times - only not hanging up because I can’t not have my say back.

 

hundreds, probably thousands of words back in stream after stream of text after - each one more hurtful, vitriolic and vindictive than the last.

 

so that’s it. The end, the final drawn line in the sand, the full and final destruction of any remaining relationship with my dying ex-wife, with as yet untold impact on our daughter that will probably only come out in future costly counselling sessions, and all too late to save the best relationship I’ve ever had.

 

fuck it all.

 

Sorry to hear that mate.

 

Life can be incredibly difficult at times, especially when it's multiple issues all at once. You will get through this though and it won't be this tough forever. 

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17 minutes ago, Captain Willard said:

Sorry to hear that. I had something similar sounding with my ex wife who subsequently died Of cancer. A lot of unbelievable hatred and anger to me even though she ran off with someone else. I think looking back she was terrified and resentful that she was dying and I wasn’t. I didn’t realise this at the time so reacted and predictably things quickly got very toxic for the kids. Probably my biggest regret in life. Try to stay calm, cut her some slack because she’s dying and focus on your daughter, that’s my only advice. 

Thanks. That all sounds familiar but the slack has been cut time and time and time again. The message I woke up to this morning is just evil in a WhatsApp. 

I know she is suffering but that doesn’t give her the right to be so hurtful and show me such little consideration and compassion.

 

If she wasn’t dying, or if she wasn’t single, this whole things wouldn’t exist. Our relationship would be one of smiling from a distance when we both end up at things because of our daughter and being as pleasant and civil as necessary at Christmas and birthdays and that’s all. We would both have just moved on and got on with our lives.


Maybe my girlfriend would’ve still left me, because maybe I’m shit in other ways and I know it’s not wholly and solely this issue with my ex wife that is the cause and reason, but honestly I don’t think she would’ve. I think she’d be here still but telling me to buck up my ideas around the other stuff.

 

Anyway, I’m over sharing and I’ve got work to do.

 

out.

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On the rare occasion me and my bird argue, I’ve always fucking hated doing it by text message. She could send four essays by the time I’d managed to send a shorter reply to to the first one. 
 

I just started saying “I’ve told you, I’m not gonna discuss anything through angry texting, you crack on if you like but don’t expect me to reply” and it put a stop to it. Also then by the time I’d see her later, most of it would have blown over. 

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On 21/08/2022 at 11:49, Captain Turdseye said:

I’ve simply stopped speaking to my mum and dad. It’s much easier that way. They add nothing worthwhile to my life and I’m already thinking about the inevitable funeral costs that I’ll be landed with. 
 

To be fair to my ma, she texts on my birthday and Xmas day, but never on any of the kids birthdays or special days, etc. 

 

 

Got a message from my sister a month or two ago saying that my ma had come into some money. Not much, backpay from the dole or some shit, but she’d given my sisters £100 each and asked them to pass £100 to me. I told my sisters to keep it but they said no, so I took it and just split it three ways into my kids bank accounts. I don’t want her money. 
 

Anyway, turns out that she’d used a chunk of it to pay off her own funeral. That’s genuinely the most thoughtful thing she’s done for years. I was actually impressed. 
 

She’s in hospital now with Covid and pneumonia. Pretty sure she’s on the mend but I did drop her a text the other day just to say if she was bored and lonely in there I’m here to chat shite.  

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33 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

 

 

Got a message from my sister a month or two ago saying that my ma had come into some money. Not much, backpay from the dole or some shit, but she’d given my sisters £100 each and asked them to pass £100 to me. I told my sisters to keep it but they said no, so I took it and just split it three ways into my kids bank accounts. I don’t want her money. 
 

Anyway, turns out that she’d used a chunk of it to pay off her own funeral. That’s genuinely the most thoughtful thing she’s done for years. I was actually impressed. 
 

She’s in hospital now with Covid and pneumonia. Pretty sure she’s on the mend but I did drop her a text the other day just to say if she was bored and lonely in there I’m here to chat shite.  

 

When my mum's fella died I had to pay for the funeral even though we couldn't stand each other because, even though my mum had been saying for years they should take out a plan, he always refused. 

 

This was the most 'in character' decision I can imagine, his thought process would have been 'I won't be here anyway so who gives a fuck what it costs anyone else.' 

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Think I’ve mentioned this in one thread or another every single year for the 18 years I’ve been posting here. 
 

But Christmas, divorced parents and splitting time between them and your own life/family is a major cunt of an operation every fucking time. 
 

And then they wonder why you hate Christmas. 

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My head continues to be fucked.

 

Mum who has dementia is now in a care home, most likely permanently. I doubt she'll last another 12 months.

 

Dad has been in hospital with an infection for over a fortnight, he's very frail and has lost a lot of weight (he was skinny to start with), developed pneumonia last week and it looked like he was on his way out. Fair does to the old fucker, he's fought back, but he will need rehab including physio before he goes back home which will be a long drawn out process by the look of it.

 

My sister and myself are run ragged with going back and forth to them, along with dealing with our own families.

 

I'm so tired I could do with 6 months off work, but that won't pay the mortgage will it?

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