The Official Cricket Thread

[Hand Shandy]

Some of the shit written on Gayle has been embarrassing

Yep.

 

Made himself look like a bellend, much like blokes do every day of the week when trying to chat up a very attractive woman.

 

Of course, the fact she was very attractive played no part at all in her getting her job in the first place. Oh no...

[A_S]

So Darren Pattinson of 1-Test-For-England fame has just signed on for the remainder of the season for a Division 2 club (for a town of less than 1000 people) in our local league. This team not only has probably the best batting line-up in the whole league, let alone division, they now have a FC cricketer as a bowler in their ranks. I have a good mate in that team who said he only joined up as he owns a greyhound with a guy at that club. Lucky cunts. 

[Ian Sea]

So Darren Pattinson of 1-Test-For-England fame has just signed on for the remainder of the season for a Division 2 club (for a town of less than 1000 people) in our local league. This team not only has probably the best batting line-up in the whole league, let alone division, they now have a FC cricketer as a bowler in their ranks. I have a good mate in that team who said he only joined up as he owns a greyhound with a guy at that club. Lucky cunts.

Get him to fix your roof while he's in town.

[alles ist gut]

Looks a good toss for SA to have won here.

[Stickman]

Brilliant work by Bairstow there 212-6 been involved in 5 of the wickets now and those two were looking pretty good...

[lifetime fan]

Great fight back since lunch from England.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

Weird days cricket with honours about even imo.

 

We wasted both new balls, Broad is out of sorts and Anderson doesn't look fully fit to me. We bowled a lot better after Lunch, especially Finn who was backed up well by Stokes. We were also aided by some strange shots and a run out by SA. That last partnership which is still ongoing between Morris and Rhubarba or whatever he is called could bite us in the arse, they played well with a few streaky shots but Anderson and Broad bowled shit at them with the new ball and before the partnership started we had SA by the bollocks. 

[Stickman]

England must be one of the worst sides in cricket to get the last wicket....SA from 281-9 to 312

and as I type they are all out for 313...(nowt like a bit of crying it home)

[Stickman]

Hales out again with a timid shot....if he's going to play he just has to go out and play his natural game, some matches it will work some it won't but it would be better than trying what he's doing now.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

Not a great start, 2 down already for 25. How many times does Cook feather one down leg side to get out, fucking idiot. 

[Guest Pistonbroke]

Taylor gone, 91/4, we are really struggling on this wicket against the pace. 

[lifetime fan]

Hales out again with a timid shot....if he's going to play he just has to go out and play his natural game, some matches it will work some it won't but it would be better than trying what he's doing now.

Someone needs to sit him down and tell him there is no other opening batsman available - you're here for the immediate future just play fucking cricket.

 

He's a decent batsman but is over thinking everything and trying to 'learn a new game' at test level.

 

It ain't going to work. Just play your natural game.

[Jairzinho]

Someone needs to sit him down and tell him there is no other opening batsman available - you're here for the immediate future just play fucking cricket.

 

He's a decent batsman but is over thinking everything and trying to 'learn a new game' at test level.

 

It ain't going to work. Just play your natural game.

 

There is another opening batsman available if we want someone else to bat like Cook, move Compton up one. If we do want someone to actually go after the bowling though the message, as you say, has to get through to Hales that that is his job. 

 

Fucking great pitch for test cricket this.

[lifetime fan]

There is another opening batsman available if we want someone else to bat like Cook, move Compton up one. If we do want someone to actually go after the bowling though the message, as you say, has to get through to Hales that that is his job.

 

Fucking great pitch for test cricket this.

Well yeah - there's loads of plodders not good enough to open.

 

He just needs to see ball, hit ball.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

There is another opening batsman available if we want someone else to bat like Cook, move Compton up one. If we do want someone to actually go after the bowling though the message, as you say, has to get through to Hales that that is his job. 

 

Fucking great pitch for test cricket this.

 

Certainly is, something in it for everyone, batsmen have to get in and still be watchful and if the bowlers get a good length it is always going to cause problems. 

 

Begs the question why Cook insisted on giving the second new ball to Anderson and Broad when they wasted the first one, Finn and Stokes bowled way better. Then we had to watch broad revert back to short ball crap against the tail enders this morning instead of just keeping a full length and good line. 

[Guest Pistonbroke]

Predicted storm is slowly moving in, you watch the ball swing soon. 

[Jairzinho]

 

Begs the question why Cook insisted on giving the second new ball to Anderson and Broad when they wasted the first one, Finn and Stokes bowled way better. Then we had to watch broad revert back to short ball crap against the tail enders this morning instead of just keeping a full length and good line. 

 

The laptops will have said so.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

If this stormy weather does get the ball swinging, which it should, then I can see the SA's getting a lot of edges due to the aggressive way our middle order play. 

[Guest Pistonbroke]

Nice 50 up for Root and if Stokes keeps batting like he is he'll be there in no time himself. 

[Spy Bee]

Interesting tactics from England. Nice to see us trying to fight back and grab the momentum rather than just meekly capitulating!

[Guest Pistonbroke]

Stokes absolutely hammers one to the boundary to bring up his 50 in style. 

[lifetime fan]

Enjoyable to watch this.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

Bollocks, Stokes out just as he was looking set for a swashbuckling big store. Saffa commentators have perked up. 

[Spy Bee]

Cracking innings that, he totally changed the momentum. Now we need Bairstow and Root, and latterly Ali to contribute too.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

Cracking innings that, he totally changed the momentum. Now we need Bairstow and Root, and latterly Ali to contribute too.

 

Hopefully, we are now trailing by less than a 100, could end up being nearly level or one team with a slight lead going into the second innings. Weather permitting we should definitely get a result on this wicket, very interesting game and test cricket at its best.