Summer Transfer Thread 2015

[General Dryness]

Thought we signed him last summer.

 

No, that was Maverick. From Top Gun.

[therevivalist]

Who the fuck is Makarov?

That's what I wanna know.

[ElishaScottBC]

[Rotpeter]

Yes, I know they did. My point was more than it isn't rocket science to ascertain who has a European passport.

 

"Ahh, Mr Paolo Berlusconi da Vinci Navarra, you wouldn't happen to have some Italian family, would you?"

Unless the club is us and the player is Sebastián Leto

[Red Phoenix]

 

 

FSG, Lovren, and Rodgers have driven them to that. Not only are they done with football, they've now fucked the western world off altogether and they're done with conventional life. Only awakening will free them from the pain of what they've suffered.

[Anubis]

Is that the new away kit?

[Paulie Dangerously]

3 Bosmans. MONEYBALLZ

[Anubis]

Who's the third?

[Paulie Dangerously]

Who's the third?

Bogman. Imminent.

[Anubis]

It's good to get all of your business done early.

[Josef Svejk]

Who's the third?

 

[Cardie]

Loads of players in South America have dual nationality. The second bit isn't hard to find out fairly early in proceedings either.

 

How many of that 'loads' have a legitimate dual passport?

 

 

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

Animal House remake ? Otis looks good. Not sure about Tom Hulce though.

[Jairzinho]

Unless the club is us and the player is Sebastián Leto

 

Italian name?

 

"Er, yeah, my name is Frank Watson, both of my parents are from Perugia"

 

This is my Italian passport -

 

[El Dangerous]

1

C. Ronaldo

Real Madrid

ESP

48

2.0

96.0

2

L. Messi

FC Barcelona

ESP

43

2.0

86.0

3

S. Aguero

Manchester City

ENG

26

2.0

52.0

4

J. Soriano

RB Salzburg

AUT

31

1.5

46.5

5

M. Icardi

FC Internazionale

ITA

22

2.0

44.0

6

L. Toni

Hellas Verona

ITA

22

2.0

44.0

7

Neymar

FC Barcelona

ESP

22

2.0

44.0

8

A. Griezmann

Atletico Madrid

ESP

22

2.0

44.0

9

J. Martinez

FC Porto

POR

21

2.0

42.0

10

H. Kane

Tottenham Hotspur

ENG

21

2.0

42.0

11

E. Zahavi

Maccabi Tel Aviv

ISR

28

1.5

42.0

12

R. Beric

Rapid Wien

AUT

27

1.5

40.5

13

A. Lacazette

Olympique Lyonnais

FRA

27

1.5

40.5

14

Diego Costa

Chelsea FC

ENG

20

2.0

40.0

15

Jonas

SL Benfica

POR

20

2.0

40.0

16

C. Tevez

FC Juventus

ITA

20

2.0

40.0

17

C. Bacca

Sevilla CF

ESP

20

2.0

40.0

18

R. Lima

SL Benfica

POR

19

2.0

38.0

19

A. Meier

Eintracht Frankfurt

GER

19

2.0

38.0

20

G. Higuain

SSC Napoli

ITA

18

2.0

36.0

21

C. Austin

Queens Park Rangers

ENG

18

2.0

36.0

22

A. Aduriz

Athletic Bilbao

ESP

18

2.0

36.0

23

R. Lewandowski

Bayern München

GER

17

2.0

34.0

24

A. Bueno

Rayo Vallecano

ESP

17

2.0

34.0

25

A. Robben

Bayern München

GER

17

2.0

34.0

26

Marco

Nacional

POR

17

2.0

34.0

27

S. Gashi

FC Basel

SUI

22

1.5

33.0

28

Fernandao

Bursaspor

TUR

22

1.5

33.0

29

M. Depay

PSV Eindhoven

NED

22

1.5

33.0

30

L. Suarez

 

Just take this big fuck off list, exclude the unrealistic targets, fuck off the English players and filter out the 28+ years olds and whichever one is quickest should be our main target. Cheaper than Benteke and just as easy to scout.

[eeyore]

1

C. Ronaldo

Real Madrid

ESP

48

2.0

96.0

2

L. Messi

FC Barcelona

ESP

43

2.0

86.0

3

S. Aguero

Manchester City

ENG

26

2.0

52.0

4

J. Soriano

RB Salzburg

AUT

31

1.5

46.5

5

M. Icardi

FC Internazionale

ITA

22

2.0

44.0

6

L. Toni

Hellas Verona

ITA

22

2.0

44.0

7

Neymar

FC Barcelona

ESP

22

2.0

44.0

8

A. Griezmann

Atletico Madrid

ESP

22

2.0

44.0

9

J. Martinez

FC Porto

POR

21

2.0

42.0

10

H. Kane

Tottenham Hotspur

ENG

21

2.0

42.0

11

E. Zahavi

Maccabi Tel Aviv

ISR

28

1.5

42.0

12

R. Beric

Rapid Wien

AUT

27

1.5

40.5

13

A. Lacazette

Olympique Lyonnais

FRA

27

1.5

40.5

14

Diego Costa

Chelsea FC

ENG

20

2.0

40.0

15

Jonas

SL Benfica

POR

20

2.0

40.0

16

C. Tevez

FC Juventus

ITA

20

2.0

40.0

17

C. Bacca

Sevilla CF

ESP

20

2.0

40.0

18

R. Lima

SL Benfica

POR

19

2.0

38.0

19

A. Meier

Eintracht Frankfurt

GER

19

2.0

38.0

20

G. Higuain

SSC Napoli

ITA

18

2.0

36.0

21

C. Austin

Queens Park Rangers

ENG

18

2.0

36.0

22

A. Aduriz

Athletic Bilbao

ESP

18

2.0

36.0

23

R. Lewandowski

Bayern München

GER

17

2.0

34.0

24

A. Bueno

Rayo Vallecano

ESP

17

2.0

34.0

25

A. Robben

Bayern München

GER

17

2.0

34.0

26

Marco

Nacional

POR

17

2.0

34.0

27

S. Gashi

FC Basel

SUI

22

1.5

33.0

28

Fernandao

Bursaspor

TUR

22

1.5

33.0

29

M. Depay

PSV Eindhoven

NED

22

1.5

33.0

30

L. Suarez

 

Just take this big fuck off list, exclude the unrealistic targets, fuck off the English players and filter out the 28+ years olds and whichever one is quickest should be our main target. Cheaper than Benteke and just as easy to scout.

Bacca is probably the only realistic decent option

[RazorBack]

Jackson Martinez as well. 25mil, 150k per week and he's ours..

[thompsonsnose]

Arsenals hard on for Schneiderlin appears to have drooped. Get him in somebody.

[Babb'sBurstNad]

1

C. Ronaldo

Real Madrid

ESP

48

2.0

96.0

2

L. Messi

FC Barcelona

ESP

43

2.0

86.0

3

S. Aguero

Manchester City

ENG

26

2.0

52.0

4

J. Soriano

RB Salzburg

AUT

31

1.5

46.5

5

M. Icardi

FC Internazionale

ITA

22

2.0

44.0

6

L. Toni

Hellas Verona

ITA

22

2.0

44.0

7

Neymar

FC Barcelona

ESP

22

2.0

44.0

8

A. Griezmann

Atletico Madrid

ESP

22

2.0

44.0

9

J. Martinez

FC Porto

POR

21

2.0

42.0

10

H. Kane

Tottenham Hotspur

ENG

21

2.0

42.0

11

E. Zahavi

Maccabi Tel Aviv

ISR

28

1.5

42.0

12

R. Beric

Rapid Wien

AUT

27

1.5

40.5

13

A. Lacazette

Olympique Lyonnais

FRA

27

1.5

40.5

14

Diego Costa

Chelsea FC

ENG

20

2.0

40.0

15

Jonas

SL Benfica

POR

20

2.0

40.0

16

C. Tevez

FC Juventus

ITA

20

2.0

40.0

17

C. Bacca

Sevilla CF

ESP

20

2.0

40.0

18

R. Lima

SL Benfica

POR

19

2.0

38.0

19

A. Meier

Eintracht Frankfurt

GER

19

2.0

38.0

20

G. Higuain

SSC Napoli

ITA

18

2.0

36.0

21

C. Austin

Queens Park Rangers

ENG

18

2.0

36.0

22

A. Aduriz

Athletic Bilbao

ESP

18

2.0

36.0

23

R. Lewandowski

Bayern München

GER

17

2.0

34.0

24

A. Bueno

Rayo Vallecano

ESP

17

2.0

34.0

25

A. Robben

Bayern München

GER

17

2.0

34.0

26

Marco

Nacional

POR

17

2.0

34.0

27

S. Gashi

FC Basel

SUI

22

1.5

33.0

28

Fernandao

Bursaspor

TUR

22

1.5

33.0

29

M. Depay

PSV Eindhoven

NED

22

1.5

33.0

30

L. Suarez

Just take this big fuck off list, exclude the unrealistic targets, fuck off the English players and filter out the 28+ years olds and whichever one is quickest should be our main target. Cheaper than Benteke and just as easy to scout.

I wish people would stop quoting really long posts.

[Philbert]

That was to be the team's Wembley attire, if we'd beaten Villa.

[INTORRESTING]

Scrollathon

 

 

[Russ Atmosphere]

Who is Kolo's pal wih the Groucho glasses on?

[Jairzinho]

Club doctor until we binned him earlier this year.

[Ranxerox]

Who is Kolo's pal wih the Groucho glasses on?

 

Isn't it obvious?

[dickie mint]

Bacca is probably the only realistic decent option

 

If they ask Ayre to get Bacca he'll cme back with half ounce of Golden Virginia.