Depression

[skend04]

29 minutes ago, joeyk said:

How did this go for you, mate? I've taken Ashwagandha for a few years now, not every day, maybe 3 times a week. Found it helpful with stress, anxiety, and sleep. 

 

Pretty similar experience. The anxiety or the thoughts are still there but they don't bother me as much, if that makes sense. Really good for the gym though, seem to be able to push a bit more than I used to. No mean feat when in my late 40s and lazy as fuck.

[joeyk]

6 hours ago, skend04 said:

 

Pretty similar experience. The anxiety or the thoughts are still there but they don't bother me as much, if that makes sense. Really good for the gym though, seem to be able to push a bit more than I used to. No mean feat when in my late 40s and lazy as fuck.

Glad it's working out for you! Reading the reviews online helped me choose a decent supply, lots out there. 

[Bjornebye]

Had the dreaded cloud the last few months. Not sure what's triggered it but the last few weeks have been really bad at times. Had a bit of time off work last week and went in to fill in a patient access form so I can book an appointment online. Asked at the desk could I get an appointment and was told I need to ring at 8am and try. Also told the forms would be sorted in a day or two so I'll be able to access online. 

 

Tried Thursday and Friday morning to get an appointment at 8am, engaged over and over all morning. Woke up this morning at half 7, bang on 8 I hit ring and engaged. Still no email about patient access so I waited and just rang up at about half 1 and said I need to see someone pronto. Got an appointment for half 2 so went in. Did me the world of good speaking to someone and despite being dead against medication since I had a bad turn on Setraline I've agreed a run at Citalopram. I just want this feeling of utter dread and despair to fuck off. Things aren't really all that bad. Not sure why it keeps coming back like this but last week felt almost like a throwback to about 5/6 years ago when I was really really down. 

 

Took my first one a few hours ago, told my missus to keep an eye on me over the coming weeks and I've taken the rest of the week off work. Come on you bastard bloody work. I bet it's just the lack of the unmentionable. 

[YorkshireRed]

4 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

I've taken the rest of the week off work.

Pre season friendly, fourth test, the open. Not a bad week to recharge and give that medicine time to do its thing. 
 

Stay safe. 

[Bjornebye]

1 minute ago, YorkshireRed said:

Pre season friendly, fourth test, the open. Not a bad week to recharge and give that medicine time to do its thing. 
 

Stay safe. 

 

Yeah not bad eh. And the dog to walk. Nice one 

[Guest]

15 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Had the dreaded cloud the last few months. Not sure what's triggered it but the last few weeks have been really bad at times. Had a bit of time off work last week and went in to fill in a patient access form so I can book an appointment online. Asked at the desk could I get an appointment and was told I need to ring at 8am and try. Also told the forms would be sorted in a day or two so I'll be able to access online. 

 

Tried Thursday and Friday morning to get an appointment at 8am, engaged over and over all morning. Woke up this morning at half 7, bang on 8 I hit ring and engaged. Still no email about patient access so I waited and just rang up at about half 1 and said I need to see someone pronto. Got an appointment for half 2 so went in. Did me the world of good speaking to someone and despite being dead against medication since I had a bad turn on Setraline I've agreed a run at Citalopram. I just want this feeling of utter dread and despair to fuck off. Things aren't really all that bad. Not sure why it keeps coming back like this but last week felt almost like a throwback to about 5/6 years ago when I was really really down. 

 

Took my first one a few hours ago, told my missus to keep an eye on me over the coming weeks and I've taken the rest of the week off work. Come on you bastard bloody work. I bet it's just the lack of the unmentionable. 

Have you tried ‘box breathing’?

 

 

[Bjornebye]

16 minutes ago, Shooter in the Motor said:

Have you tried ‘box breathing’?

 

 

 

I haven't mate. Struggling to breath in this house at the minute to be honest, the dogs arse is rancid. 

[Guest]

18 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

 

I haven't mate. Struggling to breath in this house at the minute to be honest, the dogs arse is rancid. 

I’d spend five minutes doing it. You can thank me later.

[Creator Supreme]

I'm with you Stig. You'll get through it mate.

 

I'm still feeling like shite after my suicidal ideation last week, but I'm getting there I hope. I should have taken more than one day off work, but you feel like your taking the piss sometimes.

 

The modern world has a lot to answer for,  far too fucking stressful.

[3 Stacks]

Had an awful week last week. Something is messing with my sleep and I'm either getting very little of it or I get some but wake up dead tired anyway. Was back at my very worst in terms of health anxiety, googling all sorts about what could be the cause.

 

Was my mom's birthday last weekend and was a complete depressive wreck and malcontent during it. Salvaged the weekend a bit after a talk with my parents which has helped my outlook a bit, but I'm back underwater. Not good.

[ZonkoVille77]

1 hour ago, Bjornebye said:

Had the dreaded cloud the last few months. Not sure what's triggered it but the last few weeks have been really bad at times. Had a bit of time off work last week and went in to fill in a patient access form so I can book an appointment online. Asked at the desk could I get an appointment and was told I need to ring at 8am and try. Also told the forms would be sorted in a day or two so I'll be able to access online. 

 

Tried Thursday and Friday morning to get an appointment at 8am, engaged over and over all morning. Woke up this morning at half 7, bang on 8 I hit ring and engaged. Still no email about patient access so I waited and just rang up at about half 1 and said I need to see someone pronto. Got an appointment for half 2 so went in. Did me the world of good speaking to someone and despite being dead against medication since I had a bad turn on Setraline I've agreed a run at Citalopram. I just want this feeling of utter dread and despair to fuck off. Things aren't really all that bad. Not sure why it keeps coming back like this but last week felt almost like a throwback to about 5/6 years ago when I was really really down. 

 

Took my first one a few hours ago, told my missus to keep an eye on me over the coming weeks and I've taken the rest of the week off work. Come on you bastard bloody work. I bet it's just the lack of the unmentionable. 

 

I hate hearing about people in this position. It's fucking shite and modern life just does not help. Really do hope you're doing OK mate.

[Bjornebye]

1 minute ago, ZonkoVille77 said:

 

I hate hearing about people in this position. It's fucking shite and modern life just does not help. Really do hope you're doing OK mate.

 

Thanks man. I've acted on it instead of letting it fester any longer so hopefully can nip it in the bud quick this time round. People are going through far worse that's for sure. 

[ZonkoVille77]

10 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

 

Thanks man. I've acted on it instead of letting it fester any longer so hopefully can nip it in the bud quick this time round. People are going through far worse that's for sure. 

 

It's always easy to say people are going through far worse, and you're correct and it is the sign of a good soul that you think of others. But when you feel down it's absolutely right to be selfish and look after number 1. Give yourself the love you give to others. We're all rooting for you on here. Same applies to @Creator Supreme

[Creator Supreme]

I can't really look after number 1 mate unfortunately.

 

My missus has long term joint problems, and my lad bless him has autism, adhd, dyslexia, depression and anxiety. It's a nightmare getting help for him a lot of the time because he's a belligerent sod, and my missus seems to be running out of treatment options. It kills me seeing them struggle.

 

My girls are OK. The elder one has a bit of anxiety, and my youngest may have some Autistic spectrum issues, but they're alright at the moment most of the time.

 

Also, despite having a good paying job and having a bit of cash stuck away we're struggling financially.

 

I'm way down the list of priorities as far as I'm concerned.

[KMD7]

@Bjornebye @3 Stacks @Creator Supreme look after yourselves. We're all here for you and anyone else going through it. 

[Carradona]

Experiencing real grief for the first time. Lost our mum last month on her 62nd birthday (that's forever going to be a horrible date in the calendar now), she'd been in ICU for about 3 weeks before that. 

 

It's weird how you can be having a normal day and everything's alright but then some little reminder sets you off. I suppose that's never really going to go away, is it? 

 

I wouldn't say I'm depressed but definitely find myself lacking the usual motivation to go to the gym, do tasks at the new site/house or concentrate at work.

[Section_31]

8 minutes ago, Carradona said:

Experiencing real grief for the first time. Lost our mum last month on her 62nd birthday (that's forever going to be a horrible date in the calendar now), she'd been in ICU for about 3 weeks before that. 

 

It's weird how you can be having a normal day and everything's alright but then some little reminder sets you off. I suppose that's never really going to go away, is it? 

 

I wouldn't say I'm depressed but definitely find myself lacking the usual motivation to go to the gym, do tasks at the new site/house or concentrate at work.

 

Sorry to hear about your loss Cain. The way you're feeling is the most normal thing in the world. Grief fades a bit into the background but it'll always be there, we just learn to live with it. Just give yourself time and go easy on yourself.

[stringvest]

Just reading this thread for the first time in a while - I’m sorry to hear that people are struggling - it takes courage to write about it and I truly hope you’ll be through this soon xxx

[Bjornebye]

40 minutes ago, Carradona said:

Experiencing real grief for the first time. Lost our mum last month on her 62nd birthday (that's forever going to be a horrible date in the calendar now), she'd been in ICU for about 3 weeks before that. 

 

It's weird how you can be having a normal day and everything's alright but then some little reminder sets you off. I suppose that's never really going to go away, is it? 

 

I wouldn't say I'm depressed but definitely find myself lacking the usual motivation to go to the gym, do tasks at the new site/house or concentrate at work.

Sorry for your loss mate x

[Creator Supreme]

41 minutes ago, Carradona said:

Experiencing real grief for the first time. Lost our mum last month on her 62nd birthday (that's forever going to be a horrible date in the calendar now), she'd been in ICU for about 3 weeks before that. 

 

It's weird how you can be having a normal day and everything's alright but then some little reminder sets you off. I suppose that's never really going to go away, is it? 

 

I wouldn't say I'm depressed but definitely find myself lacking the usual motivation to go to the gym, do tasks at the new site/house or concentrate at work.

Sorry for your loss chief.

[YorkshireRed]

47 minutes ago, Carradona said:

Experiencing real grief for the first time. Lost our mum last month on her 62nd birthday (that's forever going to be a horrible date in the calendar now), she'd been in ICU for about 3 weeks before that. 

 

It's weird how you can be having a normal day and everything's alright but then some little reminder sets you off. I suppose that's never really going to go away, is it? 

 

I wouldn't say I'm depressed but definitely find myself lacking the usual motivation to go to the gym, do tasks at the new site/house or concentrate at work.

Horrible news. Hope you’re doing as well as you can. Take care. 

[Harry's Lad]

40 minutes ago, Carradona said:

Experiencing real grief for the first time. Lost our mum last month on her 62nd birthday (that's forever going to be a horrible date in the calendar now), she'd been in ICU for about 3 weeks before that. 

 

It's weird how you can be having a normal day and everything's alright but then some little reminder sets you off. I suppose that's never really going to go away, is it? 

 

I wouldn't say I'm depressed but definitely find myself lacking the usual motivation to go to the gym, do tasks at the new site/house or concentrate at work.

I'm sorry for your loss mate.

 

 

 

[halewood pete]

1 hour ago, Carradona said:

Experiencing real grief for the first time. Lost our mum last month on her 62nd birthday (that's forever going to be a horrible date in the calendar now), she'd been in ICU for about 3 weeks before that. 

 

It's weird how you can be having a normal day and everything's alright but then some little reminder sets you off. I suppose that's never really going to go away, is it? 

 

I wouldn't say I'm depressed but definitely find myself lacking the usual motivation to go to the gym, do tasks at the new site/house or concentrate at work.

 

[ZonkoVille77]

1 hour ago, Carradona said:

Experiencing real grief for the first time. Lost our mum last month on her 62nd birthday (that's forever going to be a horrible date in the calendar now), she'd been in ICU for about 3 weeks before that. 

 

It's weird how you can be having a normal day and everything's alright but then some little reminder sets you off. I suppose that's never really going to go away, is it? 

 

I wouldn't say I'm depressed but definitely find myself lacking the usual motivation to go to the gym, do tasks at the new site/house or concentrate at work.

 

Sorry to hear about your loss, mate.

[Karl_b]

1 hour ago, Carradona said:

Experiencing real grief for the first time. Lost our mum last month on her 62nd birthday (that's forever going to be a horrible date in the calendar now), she'd been in ICU for about 3 weeks before that. 

 

It's weird how you can be having a normal day and everything's alright but then some little reminder sets you off. I suppose that's never really going to go away, is it? 

 

I wouldn't say I'm depressed but definitely find myself lacking the usual motivation to go to the gym, do tasks at the new site/house or concentrate at work.

 

Really sorry to hear this mate, my parents are the same age and the thought of them not being around is enough to make me tear up.

 

I've listened to a few podcasts about 'grief' (I think I posted about it here) and if you're so inclined then I'd give Griefcast a listen. Cariad Lloyd talks - and invites others to talk - about death and grief so openly and refreshingly. 

 

I think what I've learned is that grief is totally normal but also absolutely not. There's no single way to grieve, you'll never fully get over it but you'll learn to live with it. 

 

Much love Cain.