Depression

[Numero Veinticinco]

38 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

Does anyone find themselves being fixated by mundane shit? 

 

I don't worry about normal stuff such as the prospect of nuclear war, money or the mortgage, I worry about my zip being broken on a coat I don't even wear much, or sit up late at night Googling watches even though I don't want or need another one. 

Erm... very yes. Much yes.

[Numero Veinticinco]

On 1/29/2019 at 8:44 AM, .̯. said:

Waaaay too early for tongue in cheek comments. I'm only half way through my coffee. 

 

Christ, that fella's fuckin' tiny.

[Bjornebye]

3 minutes ago, Slippin’ Jimmy said:

Christ, that fella's fuckin' tiny.

Remmie isn't it? 

[Aventus]

1 hour ago, Section_31 said:

Does anyone find themselves being fixated by mundane shit? 

 

I don't worry about normal stuff such as the prospect of nuclear war, money or the mortgage, I worry about my zip being broken on a coat I don't even wear much, or sit up late at night Googling watches even though I don't want or need another one. 

Yep. 

 

I feel like it's a mixture of anxiety, and years of coping mechanisms to avoid feeling anxious. So it manifests when it shouldn't, and does fuck all when it should. 

 

I recently started a new job, I was anxious about whether I made the right choice, and if I should keep looking, even though its more money and better atmosphere it was a nagging feeling that wouldn't go away. 

 

I came to the conclusion that the anxiety was messing with my thoughts, and I'm overthinking, I'm not stuck here forever so give it 6 months and think about it again. 

 

Then I started wondering if I'm actually unhappy here and the anxiety was causing me to avoid searching for another job. 

 

Then I was wondering if the anxiety was messing with me and I'm overthinking again. 

 

Round and round, I've been here 2 weeks and I still have no idea if I'm happy or not, I don't know what my real thoughts are and which ones are caused by the anxiety and should be ignored. 

 

Pain in the arse. 

[Section_31]

6 minutes ago, Aventus said:

Yep. 

 

I feel like it's a mixture of anxiety, and years of coping mechanisms to avoid feeling anxious. So it manifests when it shouldn't, and does fuck all when it should. 

 

I recently started a new job, I was anxious about whether I made the right choice, and if I should keep looking, even though its more money and better atmosphere it was a nagging feeling that wouldn't go away. 

 

I came to the conclusion that the anxiety was messing with my thoughts, and I'm overthinking, I'm not stuck here forever so give it 6 months and think about it again. 

 

Then I started wondering if I'm actually unhappy here and the anxiety was causing me to avoid searching for another job. 

 

Then I was wondering if the anxiety was messing with me and I'm overthinking again. 

 

Round and round, I've been here 2 weeks and I still have no idea if I'm happy or not, I don't know what my real thoughts are and which ones are caused by the anxiety and should be ignored. 

 

Pain in the arse. 

Pain in the arse isn't it? 

 

I think my thought processes are based around what I consider to be achievable goals and 'preparing' for things to lessen the stress. 

 

For example, in old jobs I was so stressed I would go in early to make sure I had everything ready for the day. Now, I will start looking at winder coats online when it's not even cold, so I am 'prepared for the winter'. 

 

Also, if I buy one - that's a goal achieved, a target hit, something I can actually control. 

 

At this point though, I will then start worrying that I have too many coats and have spent too much money on them. 

[A Red]

48 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

I spend too much time on right move looking at houses I hope one day to be able to afford. Life  is shite at the minute so i try and pretend just for a few minutes that I have just bought the house and go from room to room imagining how id kit it out. Even when doing it I'm asking myself whats the fucking point in this. The prospect of a nuclear war isn't doesn't feel as bad as it should right now. If anything it will get rid of the fucking tory party. 

Far better to lose yourself for a while doing that than losing yourself in alcohol. 

 

I would say dreaming about where you could live is a positive thing, it shows hope. I browse plenty of fish looking at the women, dreaming about which ones I would go for if I could. The difference between you and me is that one day you will have that house.

[Bjornebye]

5 minutes ago, A Red said:

Far better to lose yourself for a while doing that than losing yourself in alcohol. 

 

I would say dreaming about where you could live is a positive thing, it shows hope. I browse plenty of fish looking at the women, dreaming about which ones I would go for if I could. The difference between you and me is that one day you will have that house.

Biggest change for me. Heads still west but I've put on not far off a stone since New Year just by massive cutting back drinking. Appetite is back. 

 

hahaha and thanks. 

[Babb'sBurstNad]

1 hour ago, Section_31 said:

Does anyone find themselves being fixated by mundane shit? 

 

I don't worry about normal stuff such as the prospect of nuclear war, money or the mortgage, I worry about my zip being broken on a coat I don't even wear much, or sit up late at night Googling watches even though I don't want or need another one. 

Yep. I think it's because people need something to focus on. I've no power over nuclear armagedon or the cost of biscuits, but finding some consumer shit I don't need is a mission I could achieve.

 

What's really absurd is, I'm not actually looking at things I really want, I'm more looking to find something I might want, as if discovering it will spark something and light a fire under me. At least until I get it, then cue regret at a frivolous purchase, and the cycle begins anew.

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

I do any work for anyone else and is no problem. Any work on my own home and for some reason i’m a gibbering wreck, ultra pefection has to be achieved or let meltdown commence. Currently i’m finding faults everywhere, all rooms need decorating, everything must be perfect. Won’t book a holiday in case something comes up. I have no more stuff around the house needs doing than anyone else probably but my mind tells me otherwise. My daughter is a mile away in Uni rooms, she may as well be on the moon. I break down over it out of nowhere, fucking mess Iam.

[Tony Moanero]

I obsess over the smallest of things. I’m currently throwing a strop because my wife wasn’t able to get me a can of Lilt in town today. 

[Bjornebye]

34 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

I obsess over the smallest of things. I’m currently throwing a strop because my wife wasn’t able to get me a can of Lilt in town today. 

A can of lilt in the winter? You are one serious renegade Tony. 

[Section_31]

It's funny, when I get to a certain level of miffed I get the urge to just go walkabout and never come back.

 

The Mrs has been doing my head in this week with what feels like sniping, but I don't know if it's my frame of mind. Moaning about not putting stuff back in the wardrobe or something, or leaving a couple of bits of stubble in the sink, but it's been incessant. Last night I found myself Googling jobs in the Cayman Islands. I tend to go straight to Defcon One. 

 

Growing up in a house with my mother's cunt fella and surrounded by shitbags in Speke, I just constantly had this urge to escape somewhere peaceful and be on my own, like Andy Dufresne, and whenever I get fed up that feeling comes back goodstyle. 

 

I still, deep down, think that's what I want out of life. Enough money to not worry about bills and a quiet house in a quiet place, on my own. 

 

"If somehow I manage to get home again, I promised God and myself that I would find a quiet piece of land someplace and spend the rest of my life in peace."

[Bjornebye]

35 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

It's funny, when I get to a certain level of miffed I get the urge to just go walkabout and never come back.

 

The Mrs has been doing my head in this week with what feels like sniping, but I don't know if it's my frame of mind. Moaning about not putting stuff back in the wardrobe or something, or leaving a couple of bits of stubble in the sink, but it's been incessant. Last night I found myself Googling jobs in the Cayman Islands. I tend to go straight to Defcon One. 

 

Growing up in a house with my mother's cunt fella and surrounded by shitbags in Speke, I just constantly had this urge to escape somewhere peaceful and be on my own, like Andy Dufresne, and whenever I get fed up that feeling comes back goodstyle. 

 

I still, deep down, think that's what I want out of life. Enough money to not worry about bills and a quiet house in a quiet place, on my own. 

 

"If somehow I manage to get home again, I promised God and myself that I would find a quiet piece of land someplace and spend the rest of my life in peace."

I'm the same mate. Always feel like I'm 1 more bad thing happening away from lashing my stuff in a bag and fucking off. Its not a good way to be unless you actually do it because you end up dreaming of something 'different' and miss out on whats good right in-front of you. All stems from childhood and dying to just fuck off away from everyone. 

[Section_31]

6 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

I'm the same mate. Always feel like I'm 1 more bad thing happening away from lashing my stuff in a bag and fucking off. Its not a good way to be unless you actually do it because you end up dreaming of something 'different' and miss out on whats good right in-front of you. All stems from childhood and dying to just fuck off away from everyone. 

Yep. I feel 'tired'. I've felt that way since I was about 15.

[Bjornebye]

3 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

Yep. I feel 'tired'. I've felt that way since I was about 15.

You can be my wingman anytime 

[Anubis]

On 2/12/2019 at 11:57 AM, Section_31 said:

Does anyone find themselves being fixated by mundane shit? 

 

I don't worry about normal stuff such as the prospect of nuclear war, money or the mortgage, I worry about my zip being broken on a coat I don't even wear much, or sit up late at night Googling watches even though I don't want or need another one. 

I like googling watches I see in TV programmes or films. Nowt wrong with looking at old G-Shocks either. G-Shock porn.

[Bjornebye]

Just waiting for Remmies recent breakfast to post in here 

[Section_31]

31 minutes ago, Anubis The Jackal said:

I like googling watches I see in TV programmes or films. Nowt wrong with looking at old G-Shocks either. G-Shock porn.

Oh mate I'm a fiend for that. There's a website called watches in movies. I watched American Sniper again on Sunday purely because I like his G Shock.

[Bjornebye]

22 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

Oh mate I'm a fiend for that. There's a website called watches in movies. I watched American Sniper again on Sunday purely because I like his G Shock.

Not quite "Flesh of the Stars" ...... 

[Tony Moanero]

I often stay up until 4 or 5 in the morning, watching shit like this. 

 

 

[Elite]

1 hour ago, Section_31 said:

Oh mate I'm a fiend for that. There's a website called watches in movies. I watched American Sniper again on Sunday purely because I like his G Shock.

The time must fly by.

[Bjornebye]

 

[Tony Moanero]

21 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

 

Never heard this song before. I’m not an Oasis fan but have to admit I like it.

[Oh Buoy]

In need of a holiday/break.

 

Today's been pretty shit if I'm honest. I've been shouted at or had really difficult clients in which has taken a big dent on my mood. Completely love working in mental health but it's counterproductive if the work starts making you stress/down having used up all your empathy and motivation.

 

Summer is having a great impact on my mood but it's days like today that make you just feel devalued, irrelevant or useless.

 

Just had a guy scream at me because he was scared of salads — I've been sat here thinking of whether I should have asked him if he preferred Rocket or Spinach.

[Elite]

4 minutes ago, Spring said:

In need of a holiday/break.

 

Today's been pretty shit if I'm honest. I've been shouted at or had really difficult clients in which has taken a big dent on my mood. Completely love working in mental health but it's counterproductive if the work starts making you stress/down having used up all your empathy and motivation.

 

Summer is having a great impact on my mood but it's days like today that make you just feel devalued, irrelevant or useless.

 

Just had a guy scream at me because he was scared of salads — I've been sat here thinking of whether I should have asked him if he preferred Rocket or Spinach.

Others people's moods can bring you down, if you're constantly dealing with negativity and other people's problems it's bound to have an affect on you.