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Jasper Cillessen


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38 replies to this topic

#1 Captain Turdseye

Captain Turdseye

Posted 11 July 2018 - 01:18 PM

Welcome to Liverpool.
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#2 Herp McDerp

Herp McDerp

Posted 11 July 2018 - 01:27 PM

Is a pea headed scrawny little runt. When was the last time you saw a great keeper with a tiny head, all the greats have heads that would embarrass John Terry. Fuck him. There's also the small matter of him looking like Aspas's gay eastern european uncle, I've got broader shoulders and bigger arms than him and I'm a lazy twat, looks like he'd be blown over by a strong gust of wind.

 

 

Would still take him over our two clowns mind.


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#3 Bjornebye

Bjornebye

Posted 11 July 2018 - 01:29 PM

40 caps for the dutch side, 101 for ajax, Barca saw fit to sign him. what could go wrong? 


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"I know lying is wrong, but if the elephant man came in now in a blouse with some make up on, and said "how do I look?" Would you say, bearing in mind he's depressed and has respiratory problems, would you say "go and take that blusher off you mis-shapened elephant tranny"? No. You'd say 'You look nice... John'"

 

 

 

 

 


#4 Trumo

Trumo

Posted 11 July 2018 - 01:35 PM

100 Carrot Dutch cunt.


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#5 Brownie

Brownie

Posted 11 July 2018 - 01:37 PM

Not happening.
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"We view these athletes in different lights"

#6 AngryofTuebrook

AngryofTuebrook

Posted 11 July 2018 - 01:44 PM

Never heard of the cunt.
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Resistance is never futile.


#7 setreal

setreal

Posted 11 July 2018 - 01:55 PM

250px-That%27s_a_paddlin%27.png


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The ones you light your fires to keep away.


#8 Shooter in the Motor

Shooter in the Motor

Posted 11 July 2018 - 02:03 PM

If there is one thing to ensure Liverpool don't sign a player, it's when the Cap'n starts a thread to welcome him.
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I'll read the words you wrote. "Hello fellow American. This you should vote me. I leave power. Good. Thank you, thank you. If you vote me, I'm hot. What? Taxes, they'll be lower... son. The Democratic vote is the right thing to do Philadelphia, so do." This doesn't make any sense!


#9 Mr T

Mr T

Posted 11 July 2018 - 02:04 PM

What's he like at ping pong?


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#10 Captain Turdseye

Captain Turdseye

Posted 11 July 2018 - 02:08 PM

If there is one thing to ensure Liverpool don't sign a player, it's when the Cap'n starts a thread to welcome him.


Erm... Xherdan Shaqiri says hi.


Although I think he meant pie. He’s not grasped the language yet.
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#11 Strontium Dog

Strontium Dog

Posted 11 July 2018 - 02:17 PM

Jasper can be the rock in our defence.
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Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!


#12 Strontium Dog

Strontium Dog

Posted 11 July 2018 - 02:37 PM

He's a gem of a footballer.
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Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!


#13 RobbieOR

RobbieOR

Posted 11 July 2018 - 02:40 PM

Not happening. And he's shite. 


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Viceroy, early in the morning.


#14 Mr T

Mr T

Posted 11 July 2018 - 02:46 PM

Know fuck all about him. But make it happen ffs.
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#15 Thoth

Thoth

Posted 11 July 2018 - 03:03 PM

We need a Jasper in the squad.. I’m in
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#16 Captain Turdseye

Captain Turdseye

Posted 11 July 2018 - 03:06 PM

He wants to be inside us. It’s on the OneFootball site. If that’s not an indication of an imminent transfer then I don’t know what is.

Barcelona goalkeeper Jasper Cillessen has reportedly told Liverpool he will hand in transfer request should they make a formal offer.

The Netherlands shot-stopper has been at Camp Nou for the past two seasons but has consistently played understudy to Marc-Andre ter Stegen.

The 29-year-old played just 10 times in all competitions last term and is believed to be keen on leaving the Blaugrana in a bid to earn first team minutes.

And according to Catalan daily Sport, the shot-stopper, via his representatives, has told Jürgen Klopp’s men that he will ask to be sold should they make a genuine offer.

The Anfield outfit are believed to be on the hunt for a new goalkeeper following Loris Karius’ well-publicised blunders last season.

Barça value Cillessen at €60m, but the Reds are unlikely to want to go that high for a man who hasn’t played consistent first team football since 2016.


https://en.onefootba...ansfer-request/
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#17 Captain Turdseye

Captain Turdseye

Posted 11 July 2018 - 03:10 PM

I lifted this from the always reliable SportWitness.

Then Cillessen himself turned up at Barcelona’s offices when he should have been on holiday, and there were natural assumptions made of him wanting to talk about his future.


Too much smoke for there to be no fire.

#JC1
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#18 moof

moof

Posted 11 July 2018 - 03:13 PM

60 million for a reserve keeper? Fuckin Barca
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Non-Established Since 1910

#19 Captain Turdseye

Captain Turdseye

Posted 11 July 2018 - 03:15 PM

Teamtalk.com, 101GreatGoals, The Daily Star. The list of credible sources linking us to this lad is too long ignore.

Just waiting for JOE.co.uk to confirm it and then we can crack open the champagne.
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#20 Captain Turdseye

Captain Turdseye

Posted 11 July 2018 - 03:18 PM

60 million for a reserve keeper? Fuckin Barca


The asking price has been SLASHED to under £30m according to the Express, goal.com and LADbible.
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