The world of a woman.

[A Red]

Apparently everything is fair with my mrs if i scratch my back and she scratches hers.

[Elite]

That's technically Toast on Cheese.

[Mark M]

15 minutes ago, Elite said:

That's technically Toast on Cheese.

its pushing the boundaries on what’s acceptable for toast 

[VladimirIlyich]

19 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

She’s either a Blue or a Nazi

What's the difference?

[easytoslip]

I mentioned yesterday about her calling me about Liverpool v Everton 77, cheers I said, didn't know it was on, so started watching but she was still on the phone, saying about haircuts etc they had then, next, as she was still on the phone, I said watch this when Mcdermot scored a cracker, oh yeah but the ball didn't go fast into the net though did it she said, no he chipped it I said thinking for fuck sake 

Then as they walked off for half time, still on the phone, she asked me who the most famous is out of them, what? Keegan I suppose I said, to you, Keegan for the likes of you I thought. 

[Trumo]

2 hours ago, easytoslip said:

I mentioned yesterday about her calling me about Liverpool v Everton 77, cheers I said, didn't know it was on, so started watching but she was still on the phone, saying about haircuts etc they had then, next, as she was still on the phone, I said watch this when Mcdermot scored a cracker, oh yeah but the ball didn't go fast into the net though did it she said, no he chipped it I said thinking for fuck sake 

Then as they walked off for half time, still on the phone, she asked me who the most famous is out of them, what? Keegan I suppose I said, to you, Keegan for the likes of you I thought. 

 

Do you two always sound like two biddies getting a blue rinse down at the salon?

[easytoslip]

Just now, Trumo said:

 

Do you two always sound like two biddies getting a blue rinse down at the salon?

Haha yeah, anyway anyway i said this and then she said that and I thought well I've heard it all now. 

It did come out like that didn't it. 

[Remmie]

"I've turned round and said this right"

 

The turned round part always confused me, why is this relevant, in fact you haven't turned around completely without reason halfway through a conversation, so why lie about something so bizarre and that sounds no better?

 

This country

[easytoslip]

10 minutes ago, Remmie said:

"I've turned round and said this right"

 

The turned round part always confused me, why is this relevant, in fact you haven't turned around completely without reason halfway through a conversation, so why lie about something so bizarre and that sounds no better?

 

This country

Haha, why say that? Think I'll give it a go the next time I talk to someone standing beside me,  that could be some time though. 

Mind you when I said I'm watching the boxing she asked me who's playing. 

[VladimirIlyich]

12 hours ago, easytoslip said:

Haha, why say that? Think I'll give it a go the next time I talk to someone standing beside me,  that could be some time though. 

Mind you when I said I'm watching the boxing she asked me who's playing. 

Playing? Haha! 

'Its the fella with the squashed nose and blood seeping from his eye sockets love.'

[sir roger]

12 hours ago, easytoslip said:

Haha, why say that? Think I'll give it a go the next time I talk to someone standing beside me,  that could be some time though. 

Mind you when I said I'm watching the boxing she asked me who's playing. 

The wife actually thought ' Celtic Rangers' was one team. , when I pissed myself she said ' everybody just says Celtic Rangers so I just thought it was their name '. 

[easytoslip]

1 hour ago, VladimirIlyich said:

Playing? Haha! 

'Its the fella with the squashed nose and blood seeping from his eye sockets love.'

Unbelievable. 

[easytoslip]

1 hour ago, sir roger said:

The wife actually thought ' Celtic Rangers' was one team. , when I pissed myself she said ' everybody just says Celtic Rangers so I just thought it was their name '. 

Haha. 

[littletedwest]

1 hour ago, sir roger said:

The wife actually thought ' Celtic Rangers' was one team. , when I pissed myself she said ' everybody just says Celtic Rangers so I just thought it was their name '. 

Was watching Sheffield United v arsenal years ago in a pub.

She asked who was playing so I told her " Sheffield United and arsenal " 

" what all three of them, like tag team?"

[sh#t waffle]

19 hours ago, easytoslip said:

I mentioned yesterday about her calling me about Liverpool v Everton 77, cheers I said, didn't know it was on, so started watching but she was still on the phone, saying about haircuts etc they had then, next, as she was still on the phone, I said watch this when Mcdermot scored a cracker, oh yeah but the ball didn't go fast into the net though did it she said, no he chipped it I said thinking for fuck sake 

Then as they walked off for half time, still on the phone, she asked me who the most famous is out of them, what? Keegan I suppose I said, to you, Keegan for the likes of you I thought. 

 

[easytoslip]

1 hour ago, sh#t waffle said:

 

Exactly, but how else could I put it? Anyway anyway did you see the state of her last night? Well I said, I always thought she was a Strumpet, and would anyone listen? 

[Sugar Ape]

She’s got a proper cob on with me but I’ll hold my hands up and accept this one...

 

My daughter is obsessed with castles lately, talks about them all the time so I said to her I’ll order a little castle to put in the kitchen for her to play with. 
 

Anyway, turns out it’s not so little...

 

 

[Nunavut Patrick]

On 11/04/2020 at 05:10, A Red said:

I must have a form of tourettes

 

My mrs says to me last night "god when this is over i'll be pushing 11 stone" To which I replied (i dont know what came over me) "nah, god! You havent lost that much weight"

 

Shes a size 10/12, has put no noticeable weight on at all and now isnt talking to me

 

 

 

[alles ist gut]

1 hour ago, Sugar Ape said:

 

 

 

That is top, top parenting.

[Bjornebye]

8 hours ago, sir roger said:

The wife actually thought ' Celtic Rangers' was one team. , when I pissed myself she said ' everybody just says Celtic Rangers so I just thought it was their name '. 

Holy Jesus Christ 

[sir roger]

14 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Holy Jesus Christ 

I get the distinct impression she may not be as invested in it as you , Stig.

[Bruce Spanner]

1 hour ago, Sugar Ape said:

She’s got a proper cob on with me but I’ll hold my hands up and accept this one...

 

My daughter is obsessed with castles lately, talks about them all the time so I said to her I’ll order a little castle to put in the kitchen for her to play with. 
 

Anyway, turns out it’s not so little...

 

 

We’ve got the exact same one and the kids love it!

 

Quite therapeutic colouring it in.

[Sugar Ape]

10 minutes ago, Bruce Spanner said:

We’ve got the exact same one and the kids love it!

 

Quite therapeutic colouring it in.

I’m going to leave the colouring in for her and the kid to do. Give me a little bit of peace hopefully. 

[Bjornebye]

41 minutes ago, sir roger said:

I get the distinct impression she may not be as invested in it as you , Stig.

I think the same mate 

[easytoslip]

2 hours ago, Sugar Ape said:

She’s got a proper cob on with me but I’ll hold my hands up and accept this one...

 

My daughter is obsessed with castles lately, talks about them all the time so I said to her I’ll order a little castle to put in the kitchen for her to play with. 
 

Anyway, turns out it’s not so little...

 

 

Haha, no drawbridge?