Would you be alive...

[Dr Nowt]

I knew someone with cystic fibrosis.

 

I have no idea if they are still alive, however I can confirm that much like yourself they too were a seething little cunt.

I like the sound of this person.

[Anubis]

Cracked skull at 8. Would that have killed me?

[Moctezuma]

When was penicillin invented? If not I would of died appendicitis/scarlet fever, my brother would have died due to breathing complications when he was first born. My mother would have died of pneumonia/appendicitis and my dad would be unable to walk due to knee injuries. Thankfully for me none of those things have happened to my family and I due to the advent of modern medicine and the NHS.

[Chairman Meow]

Cracked skull at 8. Would that have killed me?

 

Only if someone caught you killing them.

[Paulie Dangerously]

Broke a leg so I'd be at best s cripple and at worst died of infection at 25

[Vincent Vega]

I had appendicitis which ruptured at 31, the Romanian surgeon said it was the most difficult appendics op he'd ever had to perform. I was in complete agony when I came round from the anaesthetic, I must have used my methadone in record time. I was nil by mouth for about three days, picked up an infection that caused me to projectile vomit some kind of black shit. The worst thing was a nurse force feeding a tube up my nose and in to my stomach to get rid of the black shit, that and having to wear the white surgical tights. I then went home and thought I was on the mend only to get cellulitis in my stomach around the area where my scar was and had to go back to hospital for another 5 days as I had to be given an antibiotic intravenously. Most people who've had their appendics out have a scar about an inch long, mine is six inches and there is a second scar where the cathatar was fitted. Not sure I'd have survived all that 100 years ago.

[RoboRiise]

I'd have been dead at about 8.  Peritonitis - the consultant at the hospital reckoned I was about 48 hours away from jossing it by the time they got me in and removed the various bits of my exploded appendix (I went from the house to the operating table in under 2 hours, full blues and twos ambulance dash, the works) and that was in 1979.  The scar looks like I've been stabbed in the guts with a lance.

[stringvest]

I am

[RedKnight]

I have spectacular genes. The most deadly thing I've ever faced is when I got impaled on some spiked railings. Otherwise my hair, teeth and constitution is absolute gangbusters.

 

This would be me.

 

[Stu Monty]

I'd have gone at a very early age. Chronic asthma nearly did for me even with the best that 1980s medicine could provide.

[stringvest]

I am going under the knife on Thursday. General anaesthetic, the lot - to repair my hearing. For the last 4 weeks I've not been able to hear a fucking thing due to 'glue ear' in both ears. A century ago, they would just have amputated my head and that would be that. Due to space age advantages in medicine, technology and genetic engineering, my life will be spared. I'm having grommets put in. Apparently I may become addicted to cheese.

[mattyq]

I am going under the knife on Thursday. General anaesthetic, the lot - to repair my hearing. For the last 4 weeks I've not been able to hear a fucking thing due to 'glue ear' in both ears. A century ago, they would just have amputated my head and that would be that. Due to space age advantages in medicine, technology and genetic engineering, my life will be spared. I'm having grommets put in. Apparently I may become addicted to cheese.

Jesus, pray for Stringy

You do know what they'll be doing to your head whilst you're out?

Wear your best undies

[stringvest]

I'm wearing two pairs. I'm particularly looking forward to the paper gown.

[Remmie]

Born premature in 1971. So much so I was given the last rites by the priest. It was a caesarean, which would have taken my mum out as well.   

Beat that, 100 years ago I would have been dead five weeks before I born.

I can beat that actually, my mum is from Australia, so wouldn't have met my dad as there wasn't commercial flight then. 

 

But obviously that's cheating, we're talking medical situation here. I might have died at birth as I was unconscious coming out and they had to use some kind of machine to clear my throat. Not sure if they could have sorted that 100 years ago, might have tried smelling salts r something!

[Nunavut Patrick]

I can beat that actually, my mum is from Australia, so wouldn't have met my dad as there wasn't commercial flight then. 

 

But obviously that's cheating, we're talking medical situation here. I might have died at birth as I was unconscious coming out and they had to use some kind of machine to clear my throat. Not sure if they could have sorted that 100 years ago, might have tried smelling salts r something!

You should not have eaten your twin mate.

[A_S]

...if you'd been born 100 years ago? And if so, what state would you be in?

 

I had cellulitis last year, a skin infection which is reasonably easy to treat with anti biotics, but before that was pretty much nailed on to be fatal, so I would have been dead at 34. Had I not, I'd have been in a pretty painful state anyway, as I had an impacted wisdom tooth which was basically upside down under my gum and getting constantly infected. I doubt very much they'd have been able to get it out back then, so at the very least I wouldn't have  been much fun at parties (not that I am any way). 

 

My mum would have been dead at 28 as she had gall stones. My Mrs's dad would have been dead in his early 50s from a heart attack, one of my best mates dead from appendicitis at 26. 

 

Makes you think doesn't it? How lucky we are at times. 

 

 

I'd have probably died about 20 years ago and I'm guessing I would be rather decomposed by now. 

[Champ]

I'm wearing two pairs. I'm particularly looking forward to the paper gown.

Paper gown by Paul Smith

[melons]

Bit iatrogenic, overdosed on some medicine when i was around 3, ended up in hospital having my stomach pumped. Measles at 7, broken limbs in my teens, ruptured ovarian cyst requiring surgery, pneumonia. Urgh, thank goodness for the NHS!

[Chairman Meow]

Medically I think so. 

 

Apart from breaks and back/knee problems I've been relatively disease free, That said I've had a couple of doses of full blown can't get out of bed flu which maybe in days gone by I wouldn't have come through.

[Dr Nowt]

Imagine the GUM clinic in 1915.

 

Nothing they can stick down your japs eye now and no amount of awkwardness experienced from "...I'll just check your balls..." could ever compare.

[Barzini]

Doubt it. A back problem that required modern surgery a few years ago would have done me in. I'd either have had a few weeks in an opium den trying to kill the pain before overdosing or I'd have jumped off a cliff.

 

Edit: although thinking about it, I'd never have been at the party that I decided to climb out onto the roof, then a modern window wouldn't have closed behind me so I wouldn't have drunkenly jumped off the roof and fractured a vertebrae that went unnoticed for 20 years by everyone except me.

 

In conclusion: fuck knows.

[littletedwest]

I once had a touch of basil brush.

 

I may have pulled off my own cock through itching so god bless canestan

[VladimirIlyich]

No. Had inflammatory bowel disease in 92 and couldnt stop shitting no matter what. Lost over a stone and a half within 48 hours so would have been goner through dehydration and stuff if 100 years ago.

[Hooch]

Made me think this thread.

 

I too would have been dead within a year of being alive. I had pyrelistinotis as a newborn which is a severe blockage of the food pipe or some shit - I could projectile vomit up to 15 feet, was the damnest thing, my ma said I could hit the walls with milk which was a hell of a sight from a 3 month old baby.

 

Pretty sure 100 years ago there'd have been an exorcism and the last rites for me. 

[Section_31]

No. Had inflammatory bowel disease in 92 and couldnt stop shitting no matter what. Lost over a stone and a half within 48 hours so would have been goner through dehydration and stuff if 100 years ago.

Surprised nobody's tried to market that as a diet, maybe Sonia from EastEnders.