little things that annoy the shit out of you

[sir roger]

3 hours ago, Redder Lurtz said:

The cunts on Mastermind who say stuff like "John Smith" to avoid saying "pass" in the general knowledge round should be cable tied to that fucking chair and be ripped to pieces by angry, specially starved chimpanzees. Fucking cheating wankers. 

 

The biggest cheats are the ones who deliberately pick a really limited subject.

Saw the start of the episode last week and one guy was answering questions on the whole 200 years of the Grand National while another crafty cow was answering on 4 seasons of The Bridge on tv.

[Lurtz]

8 hours ago, sir roger said:

 

The biggest cheats are the ones who deliberately pick a really limited subject.

Saw the start of the episode last week and one guy was answering questions on the whole 200 years of the Grand National while another crafty cow was answering on 4 seasons of The Bridge on tv.

 

Yep saw that one. Shitbag. 

 

Her, not you. 

[sir roger]

Both, to be fair.

[Captain Turdseye]

Five people in our house and apparently I’m the only one that knows how to use the bin in the bathroom. 
 

Empty bog roll, on top of the bin. 
Empty shampoo bottle, on top of the bin. 
Magazine you’ve been reading in the bath, tucked behind the bin.
Empty toothpaste tube, nowhere near the fucking bin. 

 

It’s a little pedal one, for fuck sake. You don’t even need to bend down. 

[VladimirIlyich]

5 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

Five people in our house and apparently I’m the only one that knows how to use the bin in the bathroom. 
 

Empty bog roll, on top of the bin. 
Empty shampoo bottle, on top of the bin. 
Magazine you’ve been reading in the bath, tucked behind the bin.
Empty toothpaste tube, nowhere near the fucking bin. 

 

It’s a little pedal one, for fuck sake. You don’t even need to bend down. 

We have a big bin in our kitchen with black bin liners that line it and nobody else seems capable of removing it when its almost full. You also have to leave space at the top so you can tie it when removing it and putting it out for binmen. Like a game of Ker Plunk with leftover food.

[Creator Supreme]

19 minutes ago, VladimirIlyich said:

We have a big bin in our kitchen with black bin liners that line it and nobody else seems capable of removing it when its almost full. You also have to leave space at the top so you can tie it when removing it and putting it out for binmen. Like a game of Ker Plunk with leftover food.

On this continuing theme:

 

We have two bins in the kitchen - 1 for normal waste, 1 for recycling.

 

The amount of mornings I come downstairs, walk in the kitchen and there are empty jars, bottles, cereal boxes on the worktop.

 

"We don't know which bin they go in" is the cry!

 

They're 18, 17, and 12, and yes two have autism, but for fucks sake how many times do I have to explain it?

[Ezekiel 25:17]

I don't know what's happening with merseyrail at the moment but every train is fucking bedlam, sick of it, stop spending so much money on riot gear for ticket inspectors and put the new bigger train in service.

[stringvest]

2 hours ago, Creator Supreme said:

On this continuing theme:

 

We have two bins in the kitchen - 1 for normal waste, 1 for recycling.

 

The amount of mornings I come downstairs, walk in the kitchen and there are empty jars, bottles, cereal boxes on the worktop.

 

"We don't know which bin they go in" is the cry!

 

They're 18, 17, and 12, and yes two have autism, but for fucks sake how many times do I have to explain it?

absolutely no excuse for your autistic kids here - this is stuff they’re really good at usually.  They’re all playing you here. 

[Captain Turdseye]

3 hours ago, Creator Supreme said:

On this continuing theme:

 

We have two bins in the kitchen - 1 for normal waste, 1 for recycling.

 

The amount of mornings I come downstairs, walk in the kitchen and there are empty jars, bottles, cereal boxes on the worktop.

 

"We don't know which bin they go in" is the cry!

 

They're 18, 17, and 12, and yes two have autism, but for fucks sake how many times do I have to explain it?

 

We’ve got our recycling bin right near the front door and it’s the same situation as the bathroom bin.

 

Empty milk bottles and cardboard boxes left in front of the bin so they’re the first thing you see when you walk into the house. How hard is it to crush up a bottle or rip apart a box before putting it in the FUCKING BIN?

[A Red]

We have removable recycling bins built within our kitchen. When they're full you just lift them up and put the stuff outside in the bespoke recycling shelter we purchased.

 

I thought everyone did that. It's so easy.

[Kevin D]

On 28/08/2023 at 23:22, sir roger said:

 

The biggest cheats are the ones who deliberately pick a really limited subject.

Saw the start of the episode last week and one guy was answering questions on the whole 200 years of the Grand National while another crafty cow was answering on 4 seasons of The Bridge on tv.

What happened to this country?

[Pete]

People that don't indicate until the last minute.  Especially if you're waiting at a roundabout for traffic from the right to clear and some cunt indicates as they turns left.  May as well not indicate.

[Mudface]

11 minutes ago, Pete said:

People that don't indicate until the last minute.  Especially if you're waiting at a roundabout for traffic from the right to clear and some cunt indicates as they turns left.  May as well not indicate.

 

People indicate on roundabouts?? There are 6 or 7 roundabouts on the route I follow to drop my son off to work, most of them quite large so you've got no real idea where people have joined from or where they're going to turn off. About 75% of people don't bother to indicate at all, and maybe 90% don't indicate when they're going off to your right. It's annoying as fuck, and you just know the one time you don't stop, you'll get hit.

[Creator Supreme]

2 hours ago, stringvest said:

absolutely no excuse for your autistic kids here - this is stuff they’re really good at usually.  They’re all playing you here. 

Oh I know mate. I think it's a game of let's see how far we can push dad before he has a stroke.

[Pete]

17 minutes ago, Mudface said:

 

People indicate on roundabouts?? There are 6 or 7 roundabouts on the route I follow to drop my son off to work, most of them quite large so you've got no real idea where people have joined from or where they're going to turn off. About 75% of people don't bother to indicate at all, and maybe 90% don't indicate when they're going off to your right. It's annoying as fuck, and you just know the one time you don't stop, you'll get hit.

Now that is annoying!

[Captain Turdseye]

Any time someone’s talking about roundabouts I chuckle to myself about this. 
 

On 14/01/2019 at 08:17, Captain Turdseye said:

I’ve just remembered an incident that happened before I learned to drive. Mrs Turdseye was driving and I was sat in the passenger seat. There’s a roundabout near ours that’s notorious for people not indicating because people barely use one of the three exits.

 

Well this day we were using that one exit and an old lady, must have been 80 at least, pulled right out in front of us and both her and Mrs Turdseye quickly slammed on. Mrs Turdseye leaned on the horn and gave it “The fuck are you doing?” type thing and then up slowly came this old dear’s long wrinkly middle finger and she zoomed off. 

 

Having never experienced road rage myself before, I thought it was one of the funniest things I’d ever seen and burst out laughing. My bird wasn’t quite as amused though and angrily went all the way round the roundabout and set off in hot pursuit. What followed was a couple of minutes of us driving behind her, my bird with a face like thunder and me laughing hysterically, asking what she had planned when we got back to the Granny’s house. 

 

She eventually calmed down, stopped tailing her and we went on with our day but even now, years later, the memory of that middle finger salute still cracks me up.  

 

[Bjornebye]

4 hours ago, Captain Turdseye said:

Any time someone’s talking about roundabouts I chuckle to myself about this. 
 

 

 

You looked terrified to be fair

 

 

 

[Fugitive]

When your toddler decides to have a nap at 4pm. Gonna be a long fucking night.

[Creator Supreme]

Putting the two full recycling bins out for the binmen in the morning, only to have the wife moan at you for not trying to squeeze even more in!

 

Can't fucking do right for doing wrong!

[Bjornebye]

58 minutes ago, Creator Supreme said:

Putting the two full recycling bins out for the binmen in the morning, only to have the wife moan at you for not trying to squeeze even more in!

 

Can't fucking do right for doing wrong!

 

Two recycling bins? You jammy twat 

[Captain Willard]

On 29/09/2023 at 16:49, Fugitive said:

When your toddler decides to have a nap at 4pm. Gonna be a long fucking night.

Don’t let the little fuckers sleep after 4 ! Rookie mistake. We wouldn’t go on car journeys after 3 becuase the twins would fall asleep then stay awake until the small hours.  

[Creator Supreme]

1 hour ago, Bjornebye said:

 

Two recycling bins? You jammy twat 

Only because the arl girl who's son we bought the house off only had one of those skinny recycling bins, no good for a family of 5.

 

We asked the council for a full sized one, and they told us to keep the other one too.

 

Wish we could get another non-recyclables bin off them as well but they're not having it.

[manwiththestick]

I have two big blue bins and feel like king of our road.

[TheSire]

Anti animal intimacy laws. Wokeness gone mad!

[Bobby Hundreds]

Crickets. Seriously how fucking loud are these little bastards! The little pricks are awake all night like nature's fucking car alarm that can't be turned off. The sound penetrates time and space so it's like the fuckers have moved in next to your head.