Lying to strippers...

[Bob]

I just wanted to gauge opinion, and as this relates to male behaviour and strippers there is probably no place more suitable than here.

 

I recently went to a strip club with a work colleague and was astounded by his behaviour.

 

He acted as if he'd never talked to a woman before and was odd the whole time. There was only the two of us, and we were both very pissed by the time we got there, as a bit of context.

 

Anyway, we enter the place and there's about 10 stunning girls for every bloke in the place, which to me means a bit of chat and free touching before having to part with any cash. I got into that and was busy chatting to a couple of girls from one of the Baltic states when I realised the lad I was with was just stood behind me ignoring the girls other than to say one or two words before they headed off. I caught his attention and suggested we grab a drink at the bar, where I asked if he was uncomfortable in here and would prefer we went back to the hotel.

 

"no, no" he replied. "I'm just telling them I'm your security. They think you're a millionaire and are eating it all up"

 

Now what the fucks that all about?

 

Firstly, they're not eating it all up at all, they think you're a bellend and think I'm a scruffy 30 something lad with a weird mate, but secondly and most importantly, why do you feel the need to lie to a stripper?

 

If there is one place you can be entirely honest about yourself (unless you're an mp) its a strip club. They don't care at all as long as you're willing to part with some cash and maybe be polite and have a good chat too.

 

I've been with other lads who when they walk in pretend they're footballers or in one instance an engineer said he was an accountant?! Do you think these girls care enough to come after you and spoil your real life that you have to invent a alter ego?

[Bjornebye]

i lie all the time to them. i once told one my name was geoff.

[Bob]

i lie all the time to them. i once told one my name was geoff.

 

Why?

[Guest San Don]

you think these girls care enough to come after you and spoil your real life that you have to invent a alter ego?

 

Dunno. Seems to me lots of gold members here have alter ego names which they use on the FF \ GF for some reason. What the fucks that about?

[mattyq]

Maybe he was nervous and felt the need to lie to big himself up

[Bob]

Maybe he was nervous and felt the need to lie to big himself up

 

I can maybe understand that, but he lied to big me up. Maybe he felt nervous on my behalf?

[Bjornebye]

I can maybe understand that, but he lied to big me up. Maybe he felt nervous on my behalf?

 

i assume the booze had an impact. maybe he wanted you both to get better treatment. fuck knows. i cant recall ever acting normal after going into a strip club pissed. i'm either intentionally ignoring them, acting like im spying or trying to stick my thumb up there arses.

 

dont worry about it.

[mattyq]

I can maybe understand that, but he lied to big me up. Maybe he felt nervous on my behalf?

 

Who knows? A combination of alcohol, sexy birds/strippers and gay lust can do strange things to people

[TheHowieLama]

Did you let them know that you were not in fact a millionaire Dr. Spunkmouse?

[Captain Turdseye]

Did you let them know that you were not in fact a millionaire Dr. Spunkmouse?

 

Did he fuck. He was in there lighting cigars with £20 notes.

[manwiththestick]

I remember going to Angels and seeing an ex working in there, after a few weird pleasantries I told her id call her and arrange to go out for a drink but I never. Does that count?

[FrenchEyeGlass]

Going to strip clubs = stupidest shit ever.

[Red Banjo]

Strippers love money. The more you have, the more they will be all over you. I guess that would be his reasoning.

 

The fact you probably didn't splash it about, probably made him look a wally. I imagine they've heard every story under the sun, and probably sniffed him out as a blagger long before he even told you his half baked plan.

 

Mmmmmmm, strippers.

[Red Banjo]

[Jairzinho]

Going to strip clubs = stupidest shit ever.

 

Yes, this. I can't think of anything more depressing.

[dennis tooth]

fuck strip clubs

[Pureblood]

Going to strip clubs = stupidest shit ever.

 

Yes, this. I can't think of anything more depressing.

 

Thirded. It's like having a juicy steak in front of you and not being able to eat it. Rubbish.

[The Flâneur]

Yes, this. I can't think of anything more depressing.

 

I can: men who go to strip clubs, they are more depressing than the places themselves.

[Bob]

Did you let them know that you were not in fact a millionaire Dr. Spunkmouse?

 

Of course not. I don't lie to strippers ;-)

[Red Banjo]

I remember being in Spearmint Rhino's one night and my mate disappeared for ages with this dynamite blonde. He came back to the group a few mins later to beg for extra cash. Being a good mate, and wanting to egg him on i quizzed him on his bird - turns out she had just split up from some local celebrity called Milan Baros or something. Anyway he reckoned he was well in, and was on the verge of getting her number, so being the good friend i am - i packed him off with a few 20's in his hand and he was gone for the next hour. We'd bombed out well before he was finished but he caught us up in the next bar and amazingly he didn't get her phone number as she can't date customers. Funny that. The next day when we brought the night up he started going a bit crimson. Turns out once he'd gone through his notes, he could pay the rest on his credit card. Silly cunt. The daft meff only went and spent £450 on her. What did he get? A snog and a little grope of her tits. Dozy twat.

[Jairzinho]

I can: men who go to strip clubs, they are more depressing than the places themselves.

 

The social interaction between them and a stripper has to be one of the bleakest in the history of mankind.

 

Also, why do people think going to a strip club is a good idea on a stag do? Yeah, lets empty our wallets and guarantee we're not going to fucking pull.

[Pureblood]

I remember being in Spearmint Rhino's one night and my mate disappeared for ages with this dynamite blonde. He came back to the group a few mins later to beg for extra cash. Being a good mate, and wanting to egg him on i quizzed him on his bird - turns out she had just split up from some local celebrity called Milan Baros or something. Anyway he reckoned he was well in, and was on the verge of getting her number, so being the good friend i am - i packed him off with a few 20's in his hand and he was gone for the next hour. We'd bombed out well before he was finished but he caught us up in the next bar and amazingly he didn't get her phone number as she can't date customers. Funny that. The next day when we brought the night up he started going a bit crimson. Turns out once he'd gone through his notes, he could pay the rest on his credit card. Silly cunt. The daft meff only went and spent £450 on her. What did he get? A snog and a little grope of her tits. Dozy twat.

 

A mate did exactly the same thing in the London Spearmint Rhinos. £500, all on his credit card. "I thought she liked me".

[Section_31]

Strippers would see through that shit a mile away, you'd have to be pretty streetwise to work in that kind of environment. I doubt they'd be impressed by money either seeing as they're pretty well paid. It's all business to them, the dancing is business and any 'extras' they put out is business. I'd be amazed if the vast majority don't hate men by the time they've been working there for a while, can you imagine some of the absolute scum you get turning up for a dance in the ones in town? Little coked up 17-year-old rat boys and estate agents on a works night out who think flashing a money clip is going to impress anyone. You're just money to them, that's why I can't be doing with the places - I'll go for a laugh if it's someone's birthday or something, but I fail to see how anyone could possibly feel aroused seeing some predatory motherfucker who thinks you're scum dancing the jig. Yay, tits.

[Harry Squatter]

Just get a brass, I'm sure you'd get something decent for £450-£500

[lifetime fan]

I know someone who paid for himself and three mates in a whore house in Spain on their joint bank account card.