The Official 2013 Ashes Thread

[Guest LFD]

Smith is bowling very well.

 

No doubt about it.

 

Credit where it is due.

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

Smith has a face you would never tire of punching.

[George Costanza]

Not watched any of the cricket today. How the fuck has Steve fuckface Smith got 3 wickets. Calling him crap bowler is actually being kind to him. Thank fuck for Bell. Sounds like we've not learnt anything from the previous test. Maybe it will take us losing a test for it to sink in to our thick batsmen heads.

[Yozzer]

Smith is bowling very well.

 

No doubt about it.

 

Credit where it is due.

 

The Bell delivery I'll give you; Bairstow and Prior should have played far better shots to the balls that got them out. Shite gets wickets, ask Ashley Giles 143 victims.

[Manny]

Steve Smith. Steve. Cunting. Smith.

[Dan Vito Corleone]

Personally I am fucking livid. We should be 350-4 at the absolute minimum. Instead we have proceeded to throw away a catalogue of wickets. Trott, Bairstow, Prior have all let themselves down and more importantly, England down very badly.

 

We are going to be lucky to get 320 unless the tail wags again.

[Son of L8]

The Bell delivery was a good one. Bairstow should still be hitting himself in the face with his bat and saying "Stupid, stupid, stupid" right now.

[Vincent Vega]

I said this morning that Ryan Harris was a sensible pick for Australia as he had done well against England before, and he showed today that he can be a handful. What I didn't expect was Royston Vasey resident and the offspring of Tubbs and Edward to get three wickets and change the momentum of the match.

 

As for England's batting:

 

Cook will be pissed to be out to a decent but not great bowler in Watson. You can't keep a good man down though, and surely there will be a century around the corner knowing Cook's previous form.

 

Root was possibly a touch unlucky with his dismissal as hotspot wasn't totally clear. I still think it was a crazy move to ask him to start opening for England in an Ashes series and he's had two low scores in three innings.

 

Trott is the least of England's batting problems, Mr Reliable but a poor shot to get out today, very un-Trott like.

 

Pietersen is just his usual self, it seems to be either feast or famine. You can't keep a good man down though, and hopefully there will be a match winning big score just around the corner.

 

Bell has been just magnificent, I believe that's three Ashes centuries in three matches. Looking very confident, which is fantastic for England with so many others failing to make big scores. To be fair to Smith it was a very good delivery that got Bell out.

 

Bairstow is not looking like a test batsman at the moment, very fortunate with the Siddle no ball, went on to a decent knock but then gives away his wicket at a crucial time when Bell had just gone and a new batsman was in, and when a century was there for the taking.

 

Prior is another looking out of sorts, but he was England's best batsman on the New Zealand tour so hopefully this is just a blip.

 

I'm not too sure there's anyone out there really knocking on the England door and demanding to be picked despite our batsmen's current troubles. If we had a class opener in the wings I could see us picking them and moving Root back to six but there isn't anyone I can think of. Oh for a discovery like Trescothick, he was a great pick by Duncan Fletcher and immediately looked like a test class opener, he also moved the scoring along very nicely. Trott was another plucked from county cricket who shone straight away.

[Vincent Vega]

Does anyone reckon part of the reason for dropping Starc is because Clarke doesn't want a left handed bowler leaving foot marks and rough for Swann to bowl to the left handers in the Aussie team?

[Jairzinho]

 

As for England's batting:

 

 

 

Pietersen is just his usual self, it seems to be either feast or famine. You can't keep a good man down though, and hopefully there will be a match winning big score just around the corner.

 

Bairstow is not looking like a test batsman at the moment, very fortunate with the Siddle no ball, went on to a decent knock but then gives away his wicket at a crucial time when Bell had just gone and a new batsman was in, and when a century was there for the taking.

 

 

 

Johnny Bairstow is 23, has played 9 tests, and scored 67 today. Pietersen, the supposed superstar, played yet another nothing shot and got himself out for 2. Yet the former cops more flack from you. You're not alone with this by any means, but I just don't get it.

[Dan Vito Corleone]

Does anyone reckon part of the reason for dropping Starc is because Clarke doesn't want a left handed bowler leaving foot marks and rough for Swann to bowl to the left handers in the Aussie team?

 

I'm hoping Swann will get some good turn tomorrow. If a part timer like Smith is causing havoc fingers crossed that Swann will do the same. However I am convinced the Australians won't follow our example and bat like morons.

[Vincent Vega]

Johnny Bairstow is 23, has played 9 tests, and scored 67 today. Pietersen, the supposed superstar, played yet another nothing shot and got himself out for 2. Yet the former cops more flack from you. You're not alone with this by any means, but I just don't get it.

 

I'm not really giving him flack, just unconvinced on his quality at the moment. Let's be fair, Pietersen has an average of almost 49, 22 test centuries to his name and 31 half centuries so it's little surprise he gets off with his low scores, though he annoys me just as much when he gives away his wicket cheaply. Hopefully Bairstow can overcome the current flaws that the Aussies are obviously trying to exploit, I've nothing against the lad and am always happy to see more northerners in the side provided they are quality. Boycott and Tim Moody have both spotted a flaw in the the positioning of his left arm which is why he is being bowled so often at the moment, but I'm sure the England coaching staff are aware of it too and are working with him to iron it out.

[Manny]

I'm still in shock. Why do we make shit bowlers with shitter faces look like world beaters? It's bad for my blood pressure.

[Spy Bee]

I love how dramatic Agt Provocateur gets.

[Dan Vito Corleone]

I don't!

 

I'm with Manny. My blood pressure has gone past Jupiter today on a couple of occasions. I'm fairly confident that 350 will be ok but still low end. If we bowl well we should be fine.

[Jose Jones]

This has the hallmarks of England 300, Australia 500, England in trouble second innings then Prior bats for ages and we just about scrape a draw.

[Dan Vito Corleone]

We've got Bresnan, Broad and Swann to come. I would be very disappointed if we didn't have a good crack at 350. All three are very capable of test match fifties.

 

I can see a high Australian score though, unless the pitch is deceptive.

[lifetime fan]

Englang top 6 very poor again.

[Ian Sea]

What a frustrating day. It's impossible to tell if this is a good score yet though. If we get 300/350 and then get the Aussies out for 150/200 then it'll look good. If they go on and score 600 then we'll be in trouble (I can't see that happening though). Our batsmen certainly need to pull their fingers out, not good enough overall so far.

[Pureblood]

I fancy Swann to cause them problems on the sloping and turning pitch.

[Dan Vito Corleone]

Judging by the way Smith bowled today I would hope that Swann could cause a bit of aggravation.

[lifetime fan]

What a frustrating day. It's impossible to tell if this is a good score yet though. If we get 300/350 and then get the Aussies out for 150/200 then it'll look good. If they go on and score 600 then we'll be in trouble (I can't see that happening though). Our batsmen certainly need to pull their fingers out, not good enough overall so far.

 

 

I get what you're saying mate but really disagree.

 

Because we may outscore a shite Aussie side doesn't make a poor England batting performance any better.

 

I desperately don't want to see it but I reckon a few batsman need a defeat to give them a kick up the arse.

[A_S]

Damn, those 3 wickets in the last hour were crucial! The ball that got Bell was a cracker, Bairstow played a poor shot and will be kicking himself- conditions were ideal for him to kick on to a ton. As for Prior, I'd be surprised if there wasn't an element of knowing he can be enticed into playing big shots, ie giving a chance or two, to which he duly obliged...for the third time this series.

 

Credit to Bell though, the second time in as many innings that he has pulled England out of the shit. I've been so impressed seeing him grow from the intimidated little boy in 2005 into the mature player he is today. It was so important to get him out before stumps.

 

I love Pattinson, but he was poor today. I think the selectors had a feeling of not being able to carry both Starc and Pattinson right now, as they both leak runs more than would be ideal right now. VV made mention earlier of perhaps trying to deny Swann extra footmarks from the lefty to work with, which may have been a factor, but not the factor. As it stands, bringing Harris in has been justified either way.

 

A new ball, into the tail, bowlers rested, bowling out England for under 320 would be great, under 350 acceptable. Then once again, the batsmen have to make the most of the generally good work by the bowlers and get as close to England's score as possible while the batting conditions are at their best. Unfortunately, it has been squandered far too often in recent times.

[Ian Sea]

I get what you're saying mate but really disagree.

 

Because we may outscore a shite Aussie side doesn't make a poor England batting performance any better.

 

I desperately don't want to see it but I reckon a few batsman need a defeat to give them a kick up the arse.

 

I didn't mean that a low Aussie score would make our innings any better, I was thinking purely in terms of this match and whether we'll win or not. Hopefully a(nother) poor innings is enough for us to win the game.

 

I agree with the kick up the arse theory. I think a few batsmen have subconciously relaxed as everyone had us down for winning both Ashes series comfortably before they even started. Cook, Trott, Pietersen and Prior all fall into this category for me. I'll let Root and Bairstow off as they are new and Bell has been our best batsman so far.

[Rex Banner]

Our batsmen need to stand up in this first innings, we have good bowlers but the batsmen haven't backed them up. In fact a lot of the bowlers have been batting better than the batsman. Clarke needs a big score.